marytcontrary
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- Two hillbillies walk into a restaurant. While having a bite to eat, they talk about their moonshine operation. Suddenly, a woman at a nearby table, who is eating a sandwich, begins to cough.After a minute or so, it becomes apparent that she is in...
- How to Stuff and Bake a Thanksgiving TurkeyI thought I'd try this with my turkey this year!This turkey recipe that also includes the use of popcorn as a stuffing ingredient -- imagine that. When I found this recipe, I thought it was perfect for...
- He came at night, explored my body, got on top of me, touched me, he bit, sucked, swalowd, when he was satisfyed, he left, i was hurt, BLOODY… MOSQUITO !!!!
- I took a good look at my body this morning and I can't say I like what I saw. The part that really bugs me are my boobs. They aren't small or too big but they droop. I hate the thought of showing my body to a guy and having him gag.It has been...
- It takes your food seven seconds to get from your mouth to your stomach One human hair can support 3 kg (6 lb.) The average man's penis is three times the length of his thumb. Human thighbones are stronger than concrete. A woman's heart beats faster...
- Diary Of Man Who Moved To South Dakota -- long story but worth reading!!I love snow!Man digs out of snowDecember 1 It started to snow. The first snow of the season and the wife and I took our cocktails and sat for hours by the window watching the...
- I just read something I need to share!!!! Milk of Magnesia non flavored is good to help easy the rash, itching, and pain of shingles. I hope this helps someone!!!I was looking for home remedies for heat rash and found someone who had done this...
- I was standing at the bar one night, minding my own business. This FAT ugly chick came up behind me, grabbed my back side and said, "You're kind of cute. You gotta phone number?" I said, "Yea, you gotta pen?" She said, "Yea, I got a pen". I...
- Police arrested Malcolm Davidson, a 27 year old white male, resident of White Plains, NY, in a pumpkin patch at 11:38pm Friday. Davidson will be charged with lewd and lascivious behavior, public indecency,and public intoxication at the County...
- A true story from an Irish Sunday School Teacher.. I was testing children in my Dublin Sunday school class to see if they understood the concept of getting to heaven. I asked them,' If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all...
- 1. So...What'd you get in the sack? 2. Once you get under the sheet, start moaning and groaning!!! 3. Just hop on that broomstick and ride it! 4. Those small suckers are gone in a few licks! 5. I got the best piece from that house. 6. Quit screwing...
- Has anybody seen a movie called "The First Nudie Musical"?
- The best things in life either make you drunk, fat, or pregnant!
- Do any of you who have experienced shingles have trouble sleeping after the condition is past?Mom says she doesn't sleep much at night due to bathroom trips. She has pretty good kidneys but the work mostly at night. Day time she sleeps sometimes...
- I contacted a man who lost his wife a good 2 years ago. He was on a dating site. No, I wasn't but I did get wind that he was so I contacted him on facebook. Well, we were talking over a year ago but suddenly he was dating a woman and happy with...