Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) Support Group
Find support with others who have gone through a traumatic experience. Whether you have chronic or acute PTSD, we are here for you.
Hi,
This is my very first foray into an online support group like this. I am a veteran from Iraq 2004 with PTSD. My journey towards health and function has been full of ups and downs.
Right now, I am doing well in vital ways: I have stopped drinking for the longest period since my '04 deployment. I am getting stronger and clearer on the wild emotions that drove me all those years. I am also considered pretty successful among family, friends, and peers -- hardworking and dependable, despite taking great lengths to hide my deep struggles with depression, anxiety, and suicide.
This year, though, I made some great decisions. I sought therapy and attended AA. That really helped me understand the underlying causes of the actions and relationships that were hurting me.
I also came to understand how my actions and behaviors hurt other people. I've been working very hard to be a better dad to my two young children. Unfortunately, my marriage of 10 years is coming to an end.
Through these years I have done lots of reading and writing, trying to understand so much about Iraq and my past. I came from an ultra-religious family and experienced many things that I later came to realize were quite damaging to my developing sense of self.
The years prior to 2016 were a very hard road of fighting for mental survival. Yet outwardly I projected an auroa of calm and control to everyone. Now that I am admitting my issues and seeking health, I feel stronger and happier than ever in my life. But the relationships, like my marriage and old ties to the religious community, are crumbling. That really hurts.
It feels bewildering, which is by no means a new feeling. Yet this time, I really want to go about my future in a better and healthier way.
I know enough to know that I cannot do it alone. I cannot keep trying to be the stoic, silent one. Yet I know this will be okay.
I've joined this Daily Strength site in hopes of virtually connecting with some wise people. To find support. To find a place to express myself. To connect with others who maybe understand what I've been through.
I also hope time spent here will serve as an alternative to traditional social media, which often leaves me pretty stressed out.
Thanks.
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I did the dumbest thing today. I charged my earbuds, unplugged the block and put the block in my little bag instead of the earbuds. I wasn't happy about that when I got to the gym. What a dummy!
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Ever since I stopped doing therapy because of insurance, I've been feeling that old tense and irritable sense of anxiety and stress. I hate that. I was making so many strides and changes during therapy, my therapist would acknowledge all of my progress and accomplishments, and I miss that reassurance. Today I thought about it, and I made those changes! She would always tell me that I chose to...
COngrats on doing so much to help yourself heal:-)
Nope, we're all just regular people like you. I do think that as a group, we've got a certain wisdom, or if not that, at least we try. Hands down...the absolutely most caring group I've been around in a long time.
So welcome, come on in, take your shoes off, prop your feet up on the ottoman. Share as much or as little as you want.
Patti
Also it's good to set your Privacy Settings to "DS Members Only" or "Friends Only". With an open setting, it's possible to google your name and have all of your posts on here show up.
I've sought out therapy and other healthy avenues. Yet I could use this release valve... I always seem to have lots on my mind. But I just don't have the stamina for internet debates and stuff... Just want to connect.
One other note on addictions... I always thought being "under the influence" of an addiction meant the periods you were engaged with it. I'm finding out more and more that being "under the influence" also means an entire constellation of thoughts, ideas, and concepts formed in that unhealthy state.
This realization was quite great for me. It's been a relief. But also unsettling. As I continue to review the unhealthy environments that I was raised in, the cultures (like the military) that despite our great dedication also had some very terrible ways of treating people... I wonder if I can ever gain a positive understanding of what health and love really looks like.
Like, how can I get "there", if I rarely saw positive examples. Does that make sense?
That bothers me a little. But I am not giving up. The fact that I made it this far means a lot.
Has anyone ever felt that way?
https://www.dailystrength.org/group/alcoholism
"Wise people got no bodies. . .
"Wise people got no bodies to love.
"The got grubby little fingers and pointy nose.
"You got to pick them up just to say 'Hello."
At least I think that is how the song goes. . . So or no, welcome to the forum, Josef. Is the novel, by chance, "Escape from History?"
I'm sorry you are dealing with so much... bravo for attending AA. I'm sad to hear about your marriage. My youngest brother is about to get out of the USAF and he's going through a bitter divorce. My heart goes out to vets whose marriage took such a hit. I struggle with mine, too. I wish there were support groups / counseling, I don't know, something to help military families.
But I want you to know I'm glad you are here. And Btw, none of us are normal. lol.
Cheese is correct. The attempt *is* victory. Every day my mom did not drink (1989 to present) was a victory of itself. Every day I try to do better is a victory.
Oh, and "normal" is a bullsh*t word. They made it up to make everyone conform to something that no one outside a 1950s TV show could possibly conform to without going flipping nuts. And I quote my psychiatrist on that....