Welcome! You will find plenty of support here. I struggle with horrible anxiety and the panic attacks. It feels awful, I know. I don't have *great* advice but I do know that we are strong and brave ...just when it feels like we have reached out end, we survive! Take as much time as you need to get yourself on track...sleep, drink water, watch television, take vitamins, talk with a therapist perhaps. Anxiety doesn't define us, we are brave warriors!

Hi and I'm glad you're here! So sorry you've been having such a rough time. I would ask you to think about what happened 3 weeks ago that started the panic attacks. Was it a thought, something happened, hearing about bad news, etc.... thinking of what caused it to start 3 weeks ago and trying to address what that incident or thought is. Might help you to get control over the anxious thought that started this. Sometimes drugs such as Buspar could take 4-6 weeks to kick in. Do you have a psychiatrist and a therapist? If not, I would encourage you to get those two. Panic attacks are so scary but they can't hurt you physically, and they won't kill you. Take it one day at a time, sometimes one hour at a time.

I've struggled with mental illness my whole life and anxiety was always an issue but never this bad, a few weeks ago when this all started it was completely unprovoked, I was just sitting in my kitchen and BAM!!.. I've felt myself slip deeper and deeper into misery over the past year or two though when I realised that my husband started repeating history with infidelity and lying.. I've forgiven him for years and gave him chance after chance and after we got married I thought that was all behind us, he really was a different man, a good man and the best husband until out of nowhere shortly after I gave birth to our second child I learned that he'd been up to the same old crap, I've confronted him, even forgave him again all I asked is that he fully admit his mistakes and show remorse!, but like always he just denied the extent of the situation although I had the proof and this wasn't just one female I discovered him chatting with, this was at least 3 and I had proof that he went to see them, sent nude photos back and forth, I know he slept with and he even made a secret email to contact a woman from his past.. Devastating just devastating!!!...

Oh no, that is horrible what he is doing. Can just you, or him, or you and him, get into any type of couples counseling? In the meanwhile, tell him to Knock It Off, if at least for the sake of your kids. Do not let him off the hook. Say you are his wife and you will be checking up on him to see if his stories add up. I have been there hun, and it is not fun. I feel your pain. Stay strong.

I have mentioned the idea of counseling multiple times, but I don't think I'm taken seriously , and the more I check up on him and compile more proof, the better he gets at hiding stuff..

So sorry you are dealing with this. I think I know how you feel, I have been through something like that before. You could always get counseling for YOU. After all, you should care the most about YOU! Unfortunately we can't control what other people do. If you want to private message me, we could talk further, I have some ideas you could try with his infidelity. Take care and things will get better for you, they just will! :)

Maybe you are confronting a similar issue I have with situations that seem indefinite. Like, you can't see the end of the road with him. You have two children together and he is being disloyal. Perhaps you are overwhelmed with the idea that you cannot get out and you are stuck. Does your mind go over a topic constantly? If so, what is that topic?

My mind feels clogged sometimes, I repeatedly throughout the day think about things like, is my husband still up to this or that? Or are his feelings and devotion to our marriage as the way he claims? Is there something about me that can change to be a better wife so my husband doesn't do things that destroy me?.. And finally it gets to the point where my thoughts become foggy and jumbled and I just emotionally shut down and stop caring....

C_Krohl, that is a lot that understandabily would make you anxious (what you mentioned above with your husband).
I also want to say congratulations on three years of sobriety! So proud of you. With you! I am recovered also. I have found with my s.o also being recovered and on sub that close to anniversaries of certain events my s.o gets panic attacks, night terrors, etc. Then it begins to calm down. I know everyone is different. I am on meds for anxiety and ptsd. Sometimes they stop working and I have to talk to my psychiatrist about if that is causing my panic attacks. Such as recently one of my meds my doctors thought it stopped working so they tapered me off. Come to find out it was and I had panic attacks heavily for a month. Still having major anxiety. I used to have panic attacks every 5 minutes and self medicated. Been sober 2 years now. Therapy, changing meds, having a support system really has helped me. Sending you positivity, love, and many blessings. We are all here for you

Hopealways,
It's comforting to know the back to back panic attacks aren't just happening to me (I wish you didn't have to go through that either!), but I was beginning to think there's something seriously wrong with me!, like I don't even feel like a person these days!, it's such a surreal experience.

I was diagnosed 25 yrs ago with panic attacks and I have a history of choosing what one Dr called unavailable men... Not married just emotionally unavailable, so I can relate to your issues. I can tell you that 2 things that have helped me a lot - finding a job I could throw myself into (or any activity to provide something to focus on) and a group of good friends to form relationships with outside of your husband and children. Within a year of having both these things in my life, I was able to feel strong and confident enough to know I could survive without this man and the anxiety reduced significantly. I'm still in a relationship with him but once he realized I was no longer addicted to him and could live my own life, the BS stopped. He no longer chases other women and he treats me with respect.
As far as medication, Zoloft was the miracle drug for me. I had become agoraphobic and could not function. 2 months later I was travelling around the world. I still have occasional attacks but can recover quickly with a very small dose of Xanax when needed.
Good luck!

First let me say welcome and congrats on your sobriety. That in itself has to be a daily struggle for you. When you add panic attacks into the mix, I know how hopeless you can get.
While medication is your first step, I would recommend getting in touch with a therapist and also a psychiatrist (for the meds specific to panic attacks). I also recommend finding something that occupies your mind, like puzzles, coloring, computer games, reading, music, exercise or something of that sort. Maybe a combination of those things.
I have dealt with panic attacks since I was 6 years old and I am 36 now. There is not a magic answer (wish there was) but honestly, I hit rock bottom when I was 24 and decided then to seek out therapy and medication and I learned a lot of self soothing techniques. In the last 2 years, I have grown a lot spiritually and I think that has been the most helpful thing to date.
I have Ativan that I only take if I am absolutely miserable, but I also do not have any issues with sobriety so that may not be an option for you. But Trazadone was prescribed to me as a sleep aid and it definitely helps and it's not a narcotic. I actually only take that as needed, but I used to take it every night.
Good luck sweetie!