Healthy Relationships Support Group
No relationship is perfect. A long-term relationship requires constant effort to understand each other, fix misunderstandings, solve problems and continue to grow as both individuals change and evolve. How we deal with our misunderstandings is the focus of this community. Join us to find support, get advice, and share your experience with your relationship.
Hi Friends~
I joined Match.com last week and I have been talking to a man, Let's call him Alan.
I met him Thursday night in person and it seemed kind of ackward at first, he seemed uncomfortable, maybe nervous, didn't talk much.
But eventually he seemed to loosen up and talk more, Cool!
Since then he has sent me several messages saying that his is "thinking of me" and "misses me" etc....... I don't mind the "thinking of you" but the "I miss you" seems odd since we only spent a few hours together one time.
When we talk on the phone it seems a bit strained. So tonight we are on the phone and he tells me that he is having a hard time "reading" me, and that I make him feel like he is being interviewed.
(I guess he thinks I ask too many questions) but I alway ask question when I am getting to know someone (Ie....How many kids do you have?, How many marriages? etc?) Isn't that what you do on a first date?
I have always been told that I am very fun and outgoing and converse well, this is the first time that someone has told me that I make them feel "weird".
He even made some kind of comment about me being "dry".
LOL!!!
I don't get it?
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Here is my new brother, copper :) He's so tiny! Moo and Tuck were ok with him on first meeting. Rocket due to his severe aggression will never meet Cooper.
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https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTDeA9Wxg/
Yes, he went from one extreme to the other, more than likely to gage you and your reaction .
He's a chameleon.
He did tell me that he is going to a wedding Saturday night with someone else (an old ex GF) and that he only asked her because he wanted someone to go with and that if he had known me sooner he would have asked me. I let him know that it was totally cool and we didn't owe each other any reports or explanations at this point.
So all in all it was a pretty good night!
Now back to Alan… I think what we have learnt over the years is that we should trust our instincts. Your instinct is telling you this is weird so…what do we do when we think somethings weird? We move on. You are such a lovely and insightful woman you don't need to second guess yourself, you know the answer. This is not a natural fit for you. Don't waste anymore time.
I wish I hadn't x !!!
Good lord! I've know this man for a week! How do I respond to that???
How does it make you feel though?
You have to tune into yourself and your own intuition and go with your own feelings.
Someone perfect for you wouldn't be right for me and vice versa.