Hi everyone, I just came across this group by accident (though sometimes I think there are no accidents in life) and immediately thought it felt like a good place for me to be. I experienced physical, emotional and sexual abuse as a young child. I then suffered severe abuse from my peer group in my teenage years... I was bullied, victimised, ostracised and sexually abused over a six year period. I have been blessed with a wonderfully patient therapist who has been taking care of me for almost half my life now. A lot of the pain has been healed because of her... however, the damage can still be seen in my issues with trust and self esteem. I am 47 years old, single, though I have two adult children, and do not work because of a pain problem which has left me disabled... though I do some volunteer work that helps me to still feel I have a purpose in life. I am looking forward to getting to know you all... Gaye

hi, hi. well, danih already knows me well enough (lolz, setting ur kitchen on fire....and ur hand..... *eep!*), but for the rest of the group:

i'm a survivor. i refuse to use the word "victim" in reference to myself, because i've decided to take control of the situation. i will not be his or anyone else's victim ever again. i'm 22, graduated with a double bachelor's degree last may, and now work full time. i like karate, oriental culture (i want to go to japan some day), geocaching, drawing, blowing bubbles, and doing random stuff with my friends, brothers and sisters.

Hi. I'm 30. My mother had munchausen-by-proxy and was emotionally abusive. I didn't realize until 2 years ago that she had been making me sick. I have totally turned my life around since then. In the winter, after I decided to move back to the state I grew up in, I started getting bad flashbacks of memories I'd totally blocked out from childhood. I started feeling better in December, but the post-traumatic stuff has gotten progressively worse the last few months. But I'm taking it 1 day at a time.

hi my name is Carol i'm 45 and am from australia, mother of 2 young adults now, both are at uni, i'm single and not interested, i'm just starting to work through past.

Hi,
I am a 44 year old mother of two, who was sexually abused by my uncle from the ages five until the age fifteen. I work part time, I enjoy reading, camping, and being outdoors especially at the beach. My name is Deb

HI I AM 43 MARRIED FOR 17 YEARS NOW HAVE SON 16 THAT I BIRTHED AND 2 AGES 17 AND 16 THAT ARE MINE ALSO THEY STAY HERE MORE THEN THIER OWN HOMES LOL.
I WAS SEXUALLY ABUSED BY MY BIOLOGICAL FATHER WHO WAS ABUSED BY HIS AND SO ON. MY TRUTH IS " THE ABUSE STOPPED WITH ME" NO ONE AND I MEAN NO ONE HAS THE RIGHT TO PUT ANOTHER PERSON THROUGH WHAT I AND YOU WENT THROUGH AND STILL GO THROUGH DAILY. SO I AM HERE TO LEARN TO LET GO OF THE ANGER ISSUES, CAN YOU TELL I HAVE ONE, LOL. ONLY BEEN ON THIS SITE FOR 3 DAYS NOW AND IT SEEMS TO BE HELPING I AM HERE OFF AND ON ALL DAY AND MOST OF THE NIGHT TOO AS IT SEEMS I NO LONGER SLEEP EITHER. MY SON AND HIS FRIENDS SAY I AM CRAZY BUT THEN THEY STAY HERE ALL THE TIME SO I GUESS CRAZY IS GOOD.

I'm new to this site but wow what a lot of helpful stuff here. I am an adult survivor or sexual abuse, as someone else mentioned I refuse to be a victim any more. I think I have worked through a lot of the anger, I have always remembered the abuse, but it seems to me that everytime something in my life goes wrong this comes back to haunt me. I came to this site because I was looking for help coping with my husbands affair and have found so much more.

Hi. Im Jessie.
Im a 20 something professional. Im going thru a divorce right now from an emotionally abusive man. I was abused as a child starting at the age of 4. Im still trying to cope with things. I look forward to meeting all of you.
Jessie.

hi im a 36 doh its after midnight make that 37 yr old father of 2 boys 18 and 12.I was sexually abused as a young kid by my mother cant really pin-point the exact age id say between 5-8.Then a new step father was brought in and it turned to physically abuse his big goto punishment was kneeling on a tray of beans holding weights above my head and if i let the weight come down he would spank me with a wooden board untill i lifted it up again.I havent really felt anything for 12 or so years even towards my abusers i dont hate them or im not angry not sure if thats just the whole bury your feelings thing or what.Im here because i want to learn how to love and how to trust and recently when i see these things(love,trust,openess) either in life or tv or whatever ive been having these deep emotional waves it seems and its getting harder and harder to hold these emotions in(mostly cryin and sadness)
i want to be able to live a life

Hello my name is erik and i just was left alone , all alone most of the time. I'm dealing with a lot of abandonment stuff. I blocked out much of my childhood and have found out too much i think from others in the family about just being left alone. I'm making it work. When I lose a relationship though I get really sad for far too long.

hi i am serenity and i am married going on 30 years, i was sexually abused as a child by a relative, i only remember bits and pieces this person also physically and verbally abused me, i've been working a 12 step program and lately these memories are becomeing more clear. i also like to take long walks and ride my bike. i feel lucky to have such a wonderful family

hi, i'm calyn and i'm 18. when i was 8, my younger female cousin (probably) replayed a sexual abuse situation onto me and left quite a scar. i guess i feel like an idiot though because i now have a mariad of problems that will not go away. and she had kind of asked me and i said no, but then she said she would leave, so i agreed. i guess i have just always been weak, always afraid of people leaving me alone, something i just can't do. so now i have major depression, GAD, OCD, BPD, possibly DPD, an eating disorder as well as self harming. it just bothers me that i have all this stuff now, and compared to others who have the amount of psychological problems i have usually have been raped or abused for years and years. i don't understand how this happened. i don't know. i'm sorry, i'll stop wasting your time now, sorry...

My name is Liz, I'm 48 and a survivor of childhood sexual abuse. Am interested in healing the inner child. Kind of got the cart before the horse. Posted something before introducing myself. Have been in and out of the hospital for the past 30 years. Currently struggling to keep myself out of the hospital as I have no insurance and I'm not sure what good it would do anyway.
Have failed numerous prescription medications and had ECT but don't remember much about that, lol.
Not sure anymore what to do. Want to feel better.

Welcome all! And in response to Calyn, please don't ever think that your words are a waste of anyone's time. You are always welcome to vent and regardless of how significant or severe you feel that your abuse was, it was still abuse. You have just as much a right to weep, to be wounded, and to heal from your wounds as does anyone else on this site.

Hi I'm Laurie,45,single mom of 4 adult kids now & a 4 year old grandson. Was abused for years,sexual,physical,emotional & verbal,lived most of my pre=teen & teen-age years on the city streets because it was better than home. Went through alot on the streets too,but stayed stoned so I didn't care. Stopped all drugs when I found out I was pregnant & started truly living from that moment on....with setbacks of course in & out of hospitals ect.... Anyway I'm a survivor,was a great mom,not perfect,but great & my kids & I are extremely close & very good friends. My healing passion in my life is animals,still not comfortable with very many humans,but the humans I have in my life are treasures to me & I would protect them with my own life. Other than them,I've "given" myself to animals,even work in a small non-profit shelter,so ummm thats me condensed. I'm glad I've found all of you,thank-you.