Depression Support Group

Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.

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Need a pep talk

Justlenmom4
Justlenmom4

Hi everyone,


Most of you know that I had a nervous breakdown and quit a very lucrative job a couple of months ago. It has really shaken me to the core, my confidence is very low. But my husband is also unemployed and I need to pull it together and find a new job to support my family. The problem is that I am a speech therapist so being depressed can really interfere with my ability to do my job well. I am also new to the job so there is a lot to learn and I am not in a good state for a steep learning curve. 


I am doing better in terms of feeling less suicidal but I am still hiding in bed quite a lot, and having a hard time getting motivated to do much of anything but take a shower and do a few things around the house each day. I am really ashamed of the partner and parent that I have been recently. This is not at all the person I want to be and yet I am having a hard time finding a path in the right direction. 


I guess what I really need is some kind of structure to help me get things moving. I know that I need to get up at the same time every day and STAY up, get things done, etc. I have so much shame over my laziness. I realize that even though I have a master's degree, I have always been very lazy. I have never worked full time and have always spent a lot of time in bed. I had always thought that my husband would have figured out something by now and I would not have to go back to work. So I'm having a hard time accepting that. 


I also feel that I'm not very good at my job, or maybe I just don't like it. Some combination of both maybe. I am terrified that if I get another, similar job then I will fail again. It is a lot of work to be a school speech therapist and you have to be really sharp.


Thanks for reading, I guess I just need a pep talk here.


Thanks in advance

BCat1000
BCat1000
First, I just want to say that nervous breakdowns, depression and things like that take a little time to heal. You are experiencing normal feelings but should be showing some improvement with treatment. You might not feel it everyday but you are getting better. The % of working mothers is almost 70%. Don't be afraid to go full-time. There is nothing different about your life, you just have to manage time differently. The weekends become so great! Would you feel different if your husband became unable to work due to sickness or disability? Unfortunately, finding a job at 60 is not easy due to age discrimination. You need to be the one that steps forward. You are not lazy and you are not bad at your job. Your mind tells you that because of the way you feel. Your family needs you. Keeping working on treatment until you feel great. Embrace your new opportunity. It will make you stronger than you know. You are really close. Keep moving forward with confidence. As always, I wish you the best of luck.
annieheart
annieheart
Is it the job that set your breakdown in motion? If not what makes you think your not good at your job? It takes time but Im sure with experience you will be come more confident in your career. Can you start back part time?
billwfriend
billwfriend
I guess it could be like annie said....hugs
Drake6302
Drake6302
After 20 years I still fight. I managed to continue on for 19 years at the job I retired from. I had already worked there 4 years before the diagnosis. What I am trying to say is that I am an average person at best. And things took time to get back to feeling better. It happened though. Each day you wake up and have an opportunity to experience wonders and miracles. Each day is a blessing. And you here and now are victorious. Depression seeks your destruction. And you are fighting it. Everything you accomplish from now on is a victory. It doesn't matter what it is. You are victorious !!!
b_happy
b_happy
Firstly, know that failure is actually a beautiful thing. Failure in something brings a whole world of opportunity. It brings an opportunity of knowledge, new understanding, improvement. Most importantly, failure is the most true fact that we are all ONLY human. It's really a profound experience to wrap your mind around. To fail, honestly... It means to succeed. It means you have tried and it didn't work so now you have a different challenge in front of you. It's like a rewarding puzzle game.

Secondly, I understand struggling with laziness. I'm the same way with procrastination. It's hard to break habits. The only real way to break a habit, though, is to work through it. I make a list of the things I need to do and when I have an excessive amount of time to do those things I make sure I AT LEAST get one of those things on my list done. At least that way I can mark something off my list and it makes me a bit less anxious and overwhelmed.

I'm sure you will come around to finding what job makes you truly happy, whether it is the one you have or an entirely different one. And I am sure the thoughts you are having about not being good enough are placed in your head by one person: you. So, when you find yourself being a bit negative try to find two positive things to think about it as well. And don't let yourself take back positive thoughts. If you can think about the negative and agree on it you should be able to think of the positive and allow yourself to agree on that as well.

Anyways, I hope this helps. Welcome back and I'm sure things will be looking up for you. Time can be a wonderful thing. :)
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