Thank you for sharing. It is better to know that the guy is a jerk, before you two got serious. Loneliness is a powerful thing, but when it is the main reason to be in a relationship, then it can prove disastrous. Starting a family means finding a good husband to help you raise together your children. That is worth the time to get right. Never something to be forced or rushed. They also get time to know the wonderful person who is you. Thank you. God Bless.

You're under a lot of pressure right now. I'm guessing you're meeting people on an online dating app. I was trying online dating some time ago and it was HARD!!!! I've had to take a break and work on myself a bit, but it really was hard to meet decent men. I'm 44, and let me tell you, there's no rush to have kids and get married. I got married when I was 30 and in my gut I knew it wasn't right. It didn't work out.

I guess I'm trying to tell you that I so understand your frustration with dating, and that there really is no rush no matter what your family says. Take your time and invest your time in people who are worthy of your company.

It took me all my life to find someone and thought I was lucky meeting the man of my dreams. Only turning out the exact opposite.

Lol love your title.
First let me point out a couple things you may have missed since you were blinded by rage.
1. He expected to meet you at 9 pm because that's what people do who just want to hookup.
2. The fact that you ended a "relationship" the night before you had a date with someone else is sick. You need help to understand why that is sick and not ok at all.
3. Who the fuck gets "all dolled up" to meet someone at 9am, when most people are half asleep and going to work?
Girl you're obviously desperate, which is why you can't find anyone. You're coming off as some desperate sex fiend, and if that ain't you, then you need to chill out.
It takes time to get over someone. And I know what it is like to not have kids or be married and nosey people always asking if you're gay and why you can't get a man. It makes you feel bad. I know. Fuck those people. Relationships are hard to find if you don't have a large circle of friends or active in a community like church or volunteer groups. Also I think dating co-workers is gross and should be forbidden. So if you don't do all that stuff it's gonna be hard. You're left with cruising bars or signing up for a match service.
Or you can just not worry about it because people who have kids hate them and are miserable anyway. You should just have fun and be more positive, then maybe you will attract nicer friends who can introduce you to someone once you're ready.

"I am SO ANGRY and hurt and DONE with all this."

Yes, and this anger is destroying damn near everything in your life. You can NOT be happy and angry at the same time.

You are not angry at being stood up. That was a simple misunderstanding. You are angry about something else and it is not doing you any good.

Google ANGER MANAGEMENT and learn what you can.

9am? I can see the easy mistake? I would never think 9 am for a date.

You are hurting over the lost relationship, was it serious? Just wondering because If your relationship just ended last night, how did you have time to make a date for 9am next morning?
For many people (I am one) hurt can become anger.
But, we here don’t know the circumstances of how it ended, could be you have every right to some anger. Just don’t let it eat you up.
Take some time now to heal. I understand that pressure when life hasn’t turned out the way you (or others family members) thought it would. But this is YOUR life. Dont be in a rush. You could end up like me. I tried to rush a relationship that wasn’t the real thing. Now I’m a single parent.
I hope you’ll feel better after a rant and some commiseration.
At least your vibrator is reliable. Always there at the right time. Just keep spare batteries to hand lol

Hey, being single is nothing to be ashamed of. Being single is not being less fortunate than being married. I've known many who got married young, who thought that person was the "right one" and it turned out to be a disaster. I married my "high school" sweetheart" or that's what I considered her to be. After about 2 yrs. she became Dr. Jekyll/Mr Hyde. She tried to stab me on 3 different occasions, got me once, She knocked me down in the street and tried to run over me with her car, She had an ex-lover threaten to kill me but, he wasn't man enough to get it done and the final straw was when she got a gun and tried to shoot me. When the gun didn't fire, she looked at the gun and when she did that, I took it from her. Being single sometimes is a lot safer in being in a bad relationship I've had friend's exes, kill them. Be glad you still have hopes of finding someone who will love you for who you are inside rather than physical beauty or just a sexual attraction.

I'm taking a break from online dating. I think it's necessary at this point. Just a heads up.

My daughter is 34 and single.
My son married at 40, neither want children.
Live your life for yourself, not your parents or best friend or anyone.
I had a friend say...if I dont get married by the time I’m 60, I wont marry.
What a difference a year makes!
She met a man, a widower and within a year, right before she turned 50, they were married.

I’m sorry dating isnt all it seems to be these days.
But it wasnt in my days either.
You have a great plan to take a break.

I wish you well.

I am 30 and a grad student in mental health, I could have been married at 16 but wanted more. I went off the college and dated outside of my race. Some guys were ashamed of bringing home an educated black girl at times or times it was to test the waters and see if an "easy lay" would occur and epic fail on their end. All of my college girlfriends are married with children or working on their second marriages. They have been pushing online dating on me for years, I refused, Then one day, I got tired and desperate and wanted to see what the hoopla was about, I created an E-harmony account and instantly took it down because I wasn't that beat for cyber-world for romance. It works for others and others not. Then my father died, and everything changed, We didn't have a close relationship and realized a lot my issues with men were because I was attracting the wrong guys based on never know what genuine affection, compassion, intimacy (really) with and without the physical. Therefore, sometimes you have to work on yourself before love happens only then you will appreciate it rather than embracing rebound dates and relationships whether they are good or bad or indifferent.

If I were you, I would just take my time and enjoy the little things in life that make you happy. I wouldn’t worry about pursuing a serious relationship or finding the “perfect life” so to speak. There’s no such thing. Just live spontaneously and do whatever the hell you want. You have to let a lot of your anger go because it’s eating you up, and it’s not worth it.

First, why do you feel pressure to fulfill your father's expectations. I have a woman family members, lived a wonderful exciting life but married at 50. If you meet someone nice fine, otherwise, there are various websites that discuss the stress of divorce. Live your life for yourself, decide what's important to you.

I have to pay for some company. And I have a lot of bad expericens even though I am paying them.

There a lot of things I could say and clarify from my initial post that would make me look like less of a crazy skank. But I'm tired of the whole thing at this point. It's done. Thanks for the input everyone, good night.