again, jenn, i hope that you have found some peace since writing this post. i would disagree with the folks who have told you here that god is not in control, cuz he is in control according to the blueprint that i remember reading. but like i said earlier, you might be able to come to terms with the pain and suffering and still be able to understand your subject's god!?!

1 Samuel 2 (New International Version)

6 "The LORD brings death and makes alive;
he brings down to the grave [c] and raises up.

7 The LORD sends poverty and wealth;
he humbles and he exalts.

8 He raises the poor from the dust
and lifts the needy from the ash heap;
he seats them with princes
and has them inherit a throne of honor.
"For the foundations of the earth are the LORD's;
upon them he has set the world.

9 He will guard the feet of his saints,
but the wicked will be silenced in darkness.
"It is not by strength that one prevails;

10 those who oppose the LORD will be shattered.
He will thunder against them from heaven;
the LORD will judge the ends of the earth.
"He will give strength to his king
and exalt the horn of his anointed."

2 Chronicles 7 (New International Version)

11 When Solomon had finished the temple of the LORD and the royal palace, and had succeeded in carrying out all he had in mind to do in the temple of the LORD and in his own palace, 12 the LORD appeared to him at night and said:
"I have heard your prayer and have chosen this place for myself as a temple for sacrifices.

13 "When I shut up the heavens so that there is no rain, or command locusts to devour the land or send a plague among my people, 14 if my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land. 15 Now my eyes will be open and my ears attentive to the prayers offered in this place. 16 I have chosen and consecrated this temple so that my Name may be there forever. My eyes and my heart will always be there.

Psalm 75 (New International Version)

1 We give thanks to you, O God,
we give thanks, for your Name is near;
men tell of your wonderful deeds.

2 You say, "I choose the appointed time;
it is I who judge uprightly.

3 When the earth and all its people quake,
it is I who hold its pillars firm.
Selah

4 To the arrogant I say, 'Boast no more,'
and to the wicked, 'Do not lift up your horns.

5 Do not lift your horns against heaven;
do not speak with outstretched neck.' "

6 No one from the east or the west
or from the desert can exalt a man.

7 But it is God who judges:
He brings one down, he exalts another.

My heart bleeds over the pain you are going through hon. My sister passed away and like you...I was confused as to Gods plan. Trust me...she is just going to another home. Suffering is not Gods plan for us. Please do not lose faith.

I don't know what to say. I believe in God. He is a Great Power and I do believe that there is a reason for everything that happens. I am so sorry for the pain you are going through.

I'm sorry to hear about the suffering of your loved one, but isn't it contradictory to blame a God you don't believe in? If He doesn't exist, then He isn't to blame for the suffering. As someone who has had my fair share of suffering, I have learned that God allows us to suffer because He will use it to bring about greater good. I know this is hard to comprehend when you are in the midst of the suffering, but when it is over it will be clearer. As a Christian I believe that God allowed even His only Son to suffer immensely and die because of the greater good He brought from it - our salvation.

I've been angry at God before, isn't it wonderful he allows us the ability to do it.

No wonder people get mad at us Christian. Now is the time for compassion, not preaching.

I feel your pain, and I am so sorry that you and your friend are going through so much. I hope she get's better and survives this terrible ordeal.

I have been where you are now. I can remember sitting in the bathtube talking to God begging him to let my Mom's test come back negative. I told him I would do anything for him. I cried and begged him that night.

My prayers were not answered. My Mom suffered chemo and radiation for one year before she finally gave up. She didn't want to leave us children. We clung to her and wouldn't let her go. The day she died the nurse told us we had to say goodbye to Mom and let her go. It was the hardest thing I have ever done.

I got angry with God and quit church for years. I was so angry. He allowed bad people to live and hurt others and he took my Mom and she was such a beautiful person inside and out.

It's now years later and God has forgiven me for my anger. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your friend. Peggy

First and foremost I want to say thank you to: Strange, Baz, Shattered, Vixy, Morose, Pepperman, Unreachable, Hurting, and Boobookitty. You guys took this to heart and understood exactly what it is that I was screaming and hurting and pissed off about. to you guys, thank you so much. Now, I scream at "God" because all "he" is, is a fucking JOKE! A goddamn improveable THING that people chose to believe in. I'm Wiccan, been around for 10 times as long as Christianity, and so.. to answer everyone else... thanks, but :-P

Im glad my understanding helped but there is no evidence to prove Wicca has been around longer than Christianity.

Wicca (IPA: /?w?k?/) is a neopagan, nature-based[1] religion popularised in 1954 by Gerald Gardner, a retired British civil servant, who at the time called it Witchcraft and its adherents "the Wica".[2] He said that the religion, of which he was an initiate, was a modern survival of the witch cult, an old mystery religion that had existed in secret for hundreds of years, originating in the pre-Christian paganism of Europe.[2] The veracity of Gardner's statements cannot be independently proven, however, and it is possible that Wiccan theology began to be compiled no earlier than the 1920s.[3] It has been described as "the only religion that England has ever given the world"

I am so sorry for the pain you are feeling and the pain that your loved one is experiencing. I wish there was more that one could do in a time like this. It is good that you let your feelings out. Feelings as intense as those will eat you up if you keep them inside. I am sending you hopes of peace and acceptance.

The rain falls on the just and on the unjust. No one is exempt from suffering. God takes no 'joy' in seeing his creation suffer, but that is the result of living in our fallen world. We must remember that all of this earth stuff is temporal and that we CAN walk through it in His strength. ALL things work together for good to them that love God. Even all of the suffering.

p.s.: He knows your heart cry...He knows your frustration and your blame you have for Him...He loves you Jennheimrich.
Just be careful for he will not always strive with man.

i had to join this group to say this
if there is a god he must have one sick sense of humour

God doesn't 'allow' things to happen. God does not 'cause' things to happen. By my belief, we are given 'free choice'. With 'free choice' also comes the consequences of the sum of all our choices. If our choices have been foolish, we will inevitably suffer. We are also unfortunately, affected by the choices of other people, as they can be by our own choices.
These things happen because of humanity's weakness or poor choices. Not because of God.

Thank you Inked. You get it.

The term Wiccan/Wicca may have only been around a few decades but the Basis of the Religion predates Christianity by Thousands of years.

If there is a big powerful God, then he can take a little rant from you. I beleive that he doesn't. So no harm done. Vent away. (((hugs)))