ty Jessica for your post and i know that DS would not ban a member inless he/she has violated the Rules of the Road i know what your saying and DS only bans the ones that have broken the rules ty again

AND I SECOND WHAT "TIPPER' aka Millie said!!! There is ALWAYS another side that you haven't looked at.

Leslie Baker
AKA Leeall
Michigan

I agree, this is not a satisfying resolution to the situation.

A better view of the big picture can be seen when looking at a full history of all posts by a member across all the boards on this site. We members have access to this history and it gives a good view to anyone who takes the time. I think it would be a good use of time to see what's really causing the problems.

We have some people here who post threads just to start trouble then go about their merry way laughing that they got you to believe they are the victim. We have people who call someone super d_ck, you know where to put the i, this is a victim???? We have people who have proclaimed here that they are a drug abuser who seems to have been misinformed about a med they are taking but when another member points out the facs that the med is indeed an opiate she is the enemy???? Most would expect that this would be valuable information to someone in recovery. Anyone who stands up and says this person is not your enemy, just trying to help, is an abuser????

I don't understand why it seems to be the case that one person's illnesses trumps everyone elses. We are supposed to be understanding and look the other way, ignoring our own pain and stresses while we are not afforded the same understanding when most of us come here for informative, positive discourse.

I was happy to talk about this problem behind the scenes but you brought it out into the open.I am telling you and anyone else reading this that I am openly angry at the uneven handling of this recurring problem. As I am sure many have told you, we have just lost an excellent resource in this community in the banning of Erika. I would like to see an overall look into where the real trouble lies before more good members are lost because one too many buttons were pushed for them to keep their own good civility. We are all in pain here, not just a couple of people.

I third that. .Tipper and leeall are right. Which one of is going to get kicked off next?

I agree to everything you just wrote tipper.

For what I am about to write, I know will get reported and I probably will get banned, so for my friends on here, Thank you for everything.

Everything that the admin of DS just wrote was a line of BS to try and keep us happy because so many of us have complained. They do not take every report serious enough, if that was the case, the 3 trouble makers would not still be around causing trouble and be aloud to call people out of their names, turn every post into a negative post, or just plan cause trouble. They do not look at the big picture.

The 3 people who are at the center of all these troubles have violated the so called "rules of the road" more times than I can count and they are still here. I have never, not once seen Erika do anything but be caring, straight forward, give wonderful advice, supportive, and full of knowledge that has helped everyone and one point in time.

The DS admin says they do not like to ban members but have a responsibility to enfore the rules to keep the site a positive place for support, well guess what, they are not doing a very good job of it. They are giving "warnings" and banning people who are doing nothing but telling the truth to people who cant handle the truth.

This message board has turned into a place full of negative. Not the place it should be, and its all because of a certain few people and nothing is done about it. 2 of the people of been banned for multiple sites for the same exact thing. Its not like we are saying they have to leave, we just want justice done to the right people.

We had to leave this borad because we couldnt take it anymore, it was best for us just to get away, and the new place we go to is just so nice and calm and we all love each other.

If DS cant get it together maybe we all need to take a stand, make our own support group on another website that we can control.

As Chronic pain patients non of us need this extra stress, Im not saying that I let this run my life, but I like coming and talking to people who understand what I am going through when people in my everyday life dont understand, and it kinda upsets me when a few people ruin it for everybody.

So Thank you DS for not standing by your own rules!!!!

Destiny ( I am not putting my last name b/c I do not want a stalker)

I will pray for all involved that a resolution in favor of the ones in need is met.
David.

Jessica and TeamDS,

I understand that your response is protocol just as the Rules of the Road are protocol. However, as every reasonable person knows, rules are not black and white. While I respect your discretion, I urge you to further investigate the issue of Chronic's expulsion and the issue of inappropriate posts on tihs board. I trust by the number of responses you have received, you are aware that this problem will continue to arise unless the true offenders are stopped. It would be a shame not only to lose a valuable member such as Chronic but it would also be a shame to allow this group to further deteriorate.

Respectfully,

Tink
aka Zingara

Jessica,

I can only conclude that since you wrote a post on here that you have received countless messages from us about the banning of ChronicIL. I thank you for taking the time out to try and explain what and why things happen.

As Tipper said, we have members who bait and wait to see who responds and then they push the abuse button, and if I know ChronicIL she is classy she send one of these members maybe all three I dont know a Private message and let them know that they are being unkind. Then these people turned around and sent them to you and said see this is against the ROR and we demand justice.

I see that at times your hands are tied and you think we should of just ignored these people and this would not of happened, well easier said then done. We take pride and we have made relationships and we want to defend the integrity of the group. Sure we scold at times that we should not but I am sure you can understand this is human nature to do this.

I just wanted to add my thoughts and I wish you can reconsider the banning and even if you do hopefully she will come back. You can do that and just give her a end date of the ban and let her come back if and when she chooses.

I was just telling her and Tipper not more then a month ago we needed a CL and I thought they would be perfect for the position and wanted to see how we could get one in our group so it would run more smoothly. I think a lot of us think the same thing and I dont think we all can be wrong about this person that she is a A PLUS person.

I also in my former work life had over 100 employees under me and had to conduct countless workshops on how different generations act and how to get along through teamwork to get the job done, and the way I see it she was a leader taking charge and making the group better and it may have gotten misunderstood on DS side through only seeing part of the situation.

Thank you

Hi Jessica,

Thank You.

I joined this group the end of Dec. What surprised me was the number of post where members were telling everyone to report abuse with the purpose of trying to ban another member while attacking this member at the same time and constantly disrupting this members discussions. With no regard for the "rules of the road".

It amases me that these same members now have a problem because they have been reported for abuse.

Thank You,
Mary

Hi Jessica,

Really thing you folks at DS really need to take another look at ChronicIL. This is one of the most helpful, informative, knowledgeable, and pleasant folks I've had the pleasure of meeting on here.

This used to be a great board, up until about 3-4 months ago. We seem to have some folks that joined during that time that seem to have only one thing on their agenda, to cause trouble. I really do not understand how you can ban someone that has done nothing but be a help.

Because of some of the drama and childish behavior that I've witnessed in the last few months I rarely come here anymore. That's a real shame because there are some great people out here that are willing to share their experiences and knowledge with the rest of us. I really think you need to go back over the last few months and really read what's been going on here.

Elf1

DS,

You banned the wrong person.

Superduck has many proper thoughts here!

I too am very offended by the behavior of some members. I don't understand how we are to help one another if we have to be afraid to post anything other than rosy and wonderful things.

Someone told me something that I could have taken the "wrong way". I thought they wanted to help, considered their words, changed my attitude! Now I actually feel better.

To me THAT IS SUPPORT as much as all the wonderful people who can acknowledge and understand how I feel. I need both kinds of support. That is the wonder of this site. If this goes away, where do we go?

Thanks for taking time to listen. Thanks to each and everyone of you who has taken the time to write to my posts! I am moved beyond words that strangers would take the time to help me when I had no way to express the pain and frustration of my situation living like this. Each response made me improve in some way. Everyone was helpful. yet, each person saw something different. No one person expressed the very same thing. No one saw me the same way. That makes this place great.

If we all see a problem somewhere, how can we all be wrong?

I don't want to lose this group that I just found. But if it becomes a place where we are not allowed to help by offering constructive criticism, it will lose a lot that has helped me already.

I am praying that we can continue to help with all our skills.
God will provide
Sunny Mornings everyone

Sad...........very sad.

I agree w/ all the comments supporting lifting the bann on ChronicIL or at the very least, conducting further investigation and sharing the investigation w/ the group. How can this many people bet totally wrong?

If one person tells you that you've grown a tail, you may want to ignore, if 2 or 3 people tell you= you may give it some thought, if dozens of people tell you you've grown a tail, you may want to turn around and take a look.

As a former Social Worker and as an Executive Director of a Domestic Violence, Rape & Sexual Assault Program/Shelter for over 7 yrs., I am quick to recognize both overt and covert abuse. There are 2 or 3 abusers in this Group. ChronicIL is most certainly not one of them!! I'm also familiar w/ conflict of interest and fraternazation and that any supervisor or administrator must take care to avoid those situations. Should those entrusted w/ the power of oversight and administration of this Site be friends w/ individuals they are overseeing? Not meant to be disrespectful, just something to consider.
I appreciate that your responsibility is great and appreciate the time and care you obviously dedicate to this Site.
With respect and love for this Group, I (along w/ many other members) again request that you re-instate ChronicIL.
Sincerely, Deborah

If you came in at the end of December...
Then you wouldnt know how things were before- years- with out problems! IF anyone had a disagreement which was RARE (again disagreements- normal stuff) then it would be ironed out as adults and 98% of the time a sincere... *sorry* would be given AND accepted and the CP group would go on...like nothing happened.

( ** Now the following is just in GENERAL terms... I DO NOT intend to attack" anyone)

It would be between them --- NOT--- affecting the whole entire board.There was NEVER EVER ... "who will get who banned" back and forth stupid ridiculous disrespectful circus that it has turned into today. I cannot even believe what I read every day. Its gone completely BoNkers ! :(

How did it get this way? What made things change so drastically? Did a pattern start to develop at a certain point? Yes, it did. If we take a look at this as a whole, its very easy to see how this all happened. Put it all together step by step... and it would EASILY show how it got so messed up and crazy - like it is now.

We are going to have to go WAY WAY>>> back >>>> to return to the way it... WAS... BEFORE all of this NEW garbage. It was a great place- MANY people take it very seriously and means everything to many people.

I am so furious. I am not attacking ... I am saying my peace ( I am an adult - I have the right to speak my mind- its NOT being mean - its the way I see it. Which is an opinion, NOT ABUSE, Not attacking ... not being mean... not abusive...

My "peace" ...will most likely never be heard by DS because I dont think they read the threads here ( they SHOULDNT HAVE TO - they have WORK TO DO rather than responding to abuse buttons constantly.) I will not press the abuse button...why cant people discuss and say "Ok you think this... I think that....no big deal and who cares?" We are all different ~ We are ONLINE~ how can someone be ABUSED by something said online? Ignore button is the (DS) motto here and it makes PERFECT sense! if you IGNORED what you feel is abuse...then you wouldn't think you were being ABUSED and ATTACKED! You would have NO reason to hit that "abuse" button in the first place. Its YOUR RESPONSIBILITY ... its all on YOU>
DS gives the advise to hit the IGNORE. You decide NOT to listen.
Why didnt you LISTEN then?

Did someone send a threatening PM to you? Yes, you would have opened and read that and that might be something to call "abuse." That would be starting or making problems ... not right at all. You cant really put that message on ignore like DS says to do. So that is wrong. Not acceptable.

Again... this post is meant in general...
Peace