Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
after my break up with my first love just about 2 weeks ago, I feel an emptiness just feeling of being unwanted.
I tried downloading a few dating apps to maybe boost my confidence a little, maybe see if someone found me attractive but I have yet to get any likes or matches on any of these sites.
I know most of you are probably thinking well it’s better to be out and in person but the problem is I’ve never had social confidence and have never been good at it, and after she cheated on me and degraded the person I am and the way I look, I mean I just feel like I’ll never find anyone. Is this a normal feeling? How can I move on from my ex and how can I build some confidence to find the right person.
my ex was my first real girlfriend, and the only person I spent time with in 4 years
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I'm horrified! I knew my insurance would go up due to getting a new car but I didn't expect it to go up over $2,000. I did have an accident with the snow/ice in the winter. I was just telling my brother that I have had my car since March 2, 2026 and have only spent $75 on an oil change. Now this! I called another insurance company and their quote was over $4,000. I guess I have to pay...
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2 weeks is very new. It is going to take a little while to get adjusted to this new way of life, but I promise you will get there, little by little. Yes, you will find someone! You wouldn't want to rush it anyway.... you want to find the *right* one this time around. You can do it, good luck!
Well, you aren't alone. I'm like you. Only spent time with my ex (18 months). Not many friends. Etc.
The breakup for you is new. They say it takes half as long as you were in the relationship. I'm at 4 months and it can be a challenge. What I can tell you is it will get better everyday. Some days you'll cry and feel empty but it will continue to improve.
Your ex sounds horrible. I'll be honest it will take time to forget her words. Post some affirmations in the bathroom like "I am a great person", "I have a great smile"...etc. I know you don't believe it now but if you say it and read it everyday you will in time.
For dating apps, try photofeeler first. That way you can get the best picture. The pictures I thought were good...weren't. I used the ones people liked and got attention. Yes, I'm average or ugly but it helped. Just take your time. You aren't ready to date and it wouldn't be fair to you or a girl. But it's ok to see if you get attention. I use Bumble, CMB, and Eharmony.
I am sorry for what you are going through. I read your other post and GirlinCalif gave excellent advice there. As she said, look at this as an awesome gift because this gf could simply control you and make your life more miserable than what you feel now if you ever ended up together. It is hard and painful because you have grown into a habit, of being with her, thinking about her all the time and doing things together, and so on. Now it is time to grow out of that habit, and into a new reality with hopefully a brighter future. It will take time. Just take it easy and do not stress out on getting into a new relationship. Just enjoy the scenery.
Try not to pin your happiness on someone. Instead, be happy just by being with yourself. We need to learn to be alone once in a while. Learn to enjoy things and activities all by yourself, reading, going to the movies, park or library, taking a long walk. Get a hold of this book, “Have a New You by Friday,” by Dr. Kevin Leman at https://bit.ly/2OLDP2M. It gives suggestions on 1. How to accept yourself, 2. Boost your Confidence, and 3. Change your Life … in 5 days! I enjoyed reading this book. And I hope you will, for the better. When you turn into a more confident (even just a little), happy person, with a very good disposition and outlook in life, people will notice and would start to hang out more. Take it easy my friend.
Give yourself time to heal. There is no timeline of when you need to get back out there. Isolating yourself is not the answer, but be kind to yourself. It is easier said than done, I know that. It also can be scary to be alone after being with someone for so long. However, if you can't be whole by yourself, it'll be harder to be with someone in the long run. I was afraid of being alone for a long time, so I got into a very bad, emotionally, (sometimes, physically) abusive and controlling relationship. I kept trying to leave, but every time I did, until the last time, I went back because I didn't feel wanted. He made me "feel special" by acting as if no one could love me the way he did, but the way he loved me was to mistreat me. I deserve better and so do you. This is the first time in five years that I have not jumped into a rebound or gone back to a bad relationship. I am finally learning to love myself and not to sound cheesy, but you will to. So, to reiterate what I said earlier, just be kind to yourself.
Have a good day!