Breakups & Divorce Support Group
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Does anyone else feel this way? If you do, I would really love to hear about it because I feel as though I am being picky or too judgemental before a relationship even starts....
So after leaving my ex, I said to myself I need to have a man with a few criteria for my next partner - those criteria were based on the downfalls in my past relationship - they are:
needs to be independent
needs to be able to drive
needs to have career ambition
And, I always have this criteria:
needs to be at least as tall as I am.
Now that the dating field has opened up, there is a really nice sounding guy, and I am confused, he meets the first set of criterias, but not the second - I don't know why I am hesitant, but I am - maybe it's just nerves.
Does anyone else have criteria like this for a new mate, if so, I would love to hear about it.
THanks
So after leaving my ex, I said to myself I need to have a man with a few criteria for my next partner - those criteria were based on the downfalls in my past relationship - they are:
needs to be independent
needs to be able to drive
needs to have career ambition
And, I always have this criteria:
needs to be at least as tall as I am.
Now that the dating field has opened up, there is a really nice sounding guy, and I am confused, he meets the first set of criterias, but not the second - I don't know why I am hesitant, but I am - maybe it's just nerves.
Does anyone else have criteria like this for a new mate, if so, I would love to hear about it.
THanks
2. Has a career
3. Drug free
4. Family oriented
5. Drug free
6. Kind hearted
7. Drug free
8. Honest
9. Drug free
10. Loyal
11. Drug free
12. Good sense of humor
Oh and did I mention DRUG FREE!
NO need to "Party" all the time
no history of cheating
does not have 25 numbers in her phone that are all "just guy freinds"
anything else is is up for discussion.
- honesty
- loyal
- healthy life style
- commited to relationship, which is "us", and family
- able to communicate with me on all levels from intimacy to hobbies
- is their own person
- values me as a person
- values my independence
- but more than anything give our relationship time for growth, compatibility, love, and expectations of more
- the very most important, is he is my best friend, my partner, and unconditionally supports me
- knows the importance of finding value in family and friends
Take responsibility
Want to be with me
Answer the phone when I call
Not tell me to call roadside assistance
Not fat
Not a drunk
Not into drugs
I know what I don't want that is for sure!!
- Understands what committment is and believes in it
- Independent and confident/not too needy/able to make decisions
- Easy going and down to earth/able to enjoy the simple things
- Boringly normal is fine with me - No major baggage
- No addictions
- Similar values
- Able to communicate other than with sarcasm
- Great sense of humor - I love to laugh
- Not an absolute cynic
- Has to be able to look me in the eye - windows to the soul
Trustworthy
Honest
Strong (mentally)
Smart
I spent 6 1/2 years being the smart, strong, financially indepentant one.
NO more! In the future, they must be as independant as I am, and respect me for it! Not get resentful and get back at me by having an affair!
2. no freakin dragsters or car obsessions
3. loves hugs, welcomes cuddles
4. wants Me
5. has a heart
6. has time for me
7. shares dreams and goals
8. doesn't yell
From the male perspective, I think my criteria would be someone not;
Crazy
On Drugs
Crazy while on drugs
Has some spec of insight to financial responsibility
Not Argumentative
Not Jealous, and that means no little comments about the busty girls on T.V. that believe it or not, I am not having an affair with!!!!!
-great integrity (honest, monogamous, etc.)
-sense of humor/doesn't take himself too
seriously
-NO DRUGS, NO ADDICTIONS, DOESN'T DRINK OR
DRINKS RARELY (hey...I'm in recovery!)
-respects women
-goal oriented/established career
(not a workaholic though!)
-has a triple digit IQ/words with more
than two syllables don't confuse him--
LOL!
-likes children (especially my own!)
-attractive "to me"--inside and out
-affectionate (intellectually, emotionally,
spiritually, and PHYSICALLY!!)
-Not jealous, controlling or cynical
-has social graces/manners
-takes care of himself; dresses nicely,
grooms appropriately, and has a healthy
and active lifestyle.
-Egomaniacs with an inferiority complex
need not apply :)
-Family is important to him (my family too)
-My bestfriend
-Not threatened by my independence (not
clingy).
-No anger issues
-Has my best interest (not just out for
himself).
Okay....this is getting a bit long, but I'd
say that this was a good BASELINE!
1. someone who can make me laugh
2. conversationalist
3. humble
4. goal oriented
5. team player
6. fights fair(can admit when he is wrong)
7. loves to travel
8. wise
9. loves to hike/outdoorsy
10. believes in God
11. has guy friends(does guy nights out)
12. family man
13. manly man
14. can laugh at himself
15. plans anniversaries and my birthdays
16. surprises me
17. lets me drive the new car
18. someone I can toe wrestle with