Well anyone living with someone whose mental disorder has only recently become stable, would practically be expected to suffer from depression and self esteem issues.

Odd how you gave yourself how many years to get control over your disorder, now cannot seem to fathom her recent problems!

There's much more to this story than meets the eye!

Man that's pretty brutal. Kicking her out for just smoking some weed.

Gotta be more to this than just that.

sorry, just my opinion.

Courier not everyone updates their profile all the time.. He might be doing good. You dont know.

Odd remark, G, coming from someone whose first reply to this thread started out with "If that was my wife I would kick her a** to the curb. "

Okay, something still doesn't add up here.

From your profile: "married 6 years to high school sweetheart. been divorced 9 years. just recently contacted her through google. she responded and it hurts all over again"

And you still haven't answered the questions.

Is she the mother of your child?

How long have you known about her marijuana use?

How long have you been married?

And I'd like to add one more. Is she the person you wrote about in your profile?

Carry the 1, SFY.

Well, we'd know if he'd answer the questions. That he very much is avoiding. No questions GSCH? Don't hear an answer on whether counselings been tried, whether she has insurance and can seek assistance for her depression, whether an opportunity has been given for sobering up, (which incidentally several we're given to my ex) perhaps a treatment facility explored and no answer as to why he seems to think he is the judge, jury, and executioner when he hasn't even filed anything yet? Turn it around. If this were a women talking about her husband GSCH you'd be screaming foul.

So you met and married her and she was constantly stoned. You had a child and presumably she was home taking care of the baby constantly stoned.

I can understand you having had enough and wanting out.

BUT this isn't going to all be a happy ending. You Will be on the hook to give her alimony. Hey, it can't have escaped your notice that she wasn't working.

I have NO idea how much assets you have, but she will be entitled to half.

And you will get into Deep trouble if you try to mix custody with the financial settlement.

Unless she has some Convictions, or you can Prove the drug abuse, you will have a hard time getting sole custody away from a stay at home mom. She will likely get free counsel and this is going to end up being dragged out for Years.

I feel for you, I do. I'd hate my kid being raised by someone like my ex SIL who was costantly smoking too.

I think that your best bet is to make a More Than Fair split, and 50/50 custody. And yes, there may not be enough money to go around and Both of you may very well end up out of the house. Or you may be able to negotiate with the bank and stay there. Banks really don't want to take over the house.

Again finding a job (even min wage) in MI will be a challange, and the courts won't see her as just being difficult.

Likely she will end up on State Aide...whatever it's called there.

As much as I hate my ex drinking around his kids, he IS the man I chose to have kids with. I won't just take that away, unless there is some Serious incident.

In PA at least, it's very hard to get a parents rights completely taken away...a lot more than just being drunk around them. DUI with the kids in the car can, but doesn't automatically do it. But your STBX doesn't even drive.

If you want her out, I'd go through the courts....forcing her out may backfire on you big time. Would you like it if She got complete custody dispite the drug use?

And neither you or her can completely waive child support in most states. And if the person moves to another state, then That state can require it.

It sounds like you are in an awful situation.

If you want my best advice. Start finding someone who will watch your child when you're not there. If the courts see you paying someone to watch the child even when your ex is Home, they will take your opinion about her mom's drug use more seriously.

That's the way I'd spend that $1000 if I was married to an addict.

My son is from my second marriage of ten years she is the mother of our son. Like I mentioned eairler her life style this past year and a half is the issue I have and its negitive effects on my son. her attitude toward both of us and life in general she refuses any help even as simple as a dr appt.

She has hermited and secluded herself from life in every way anger is her mood of choice most days.

LOL. Another good point Patti. I doubt not being able to find a job is going to be a big problem in the court system considering 45% of the State is unemployed and another 65% of the state is below poverty.

And be careful. If you just kick her out, it may be within her rights and move with the child to another state.

And it's got to be her child if visitation is even an issue.

I am going on what he put on the disscusion. I am not going on what is in his profile or doing a back round check on this guy. I do know first hand this same thing. My first wife smoked every once in a while and when we moved to GA. Where her brother lived she got worse. Almost everyday. She never did it around the kids. Her kids. She would not stop so I kicked her ass to the curb. That day I found out the guy she was getting it from she was sleeping with. I was not going to lose my apt because she did not want to stop.

All I'm saying G is that my coke addicted ex lived in the house that I owned and contributed less than half to the bills because he was mostly unemployed due to his addiction and I physically had to leave my home with my child because in this state he is required a sixty day notice. Even if he didn't pay a dime. And he lived in my house for sixty days. There was no miraculous loop hole around it and we weren't even married! I would imagine she's going to be afforded even more than that.

See this is actually a bit funny to me now.

Just yesterday we had a woman throw her husband out because of a phone call from another woman and we heard chearing and support for the action.

Now we have people doing the opposite.


I will say though I agree with people, I do not understand the lawyers decision to advise him to not give her money and throwing her out on the street with no support.

As far as people asking why he would wait now as far as her drugs with his kid around? Why do abused people stay so long as they do, love and marriage do not always help people make the best decisions.


So from here I would say talk with another lawyer, something sounds fishy. Find shelters and or a drug rehab facility for her and go from there.

LOL. Mopri, I gotta say, I don't think I was supportive of that one either. I was however, supportive of the women who smacked her estranged husband that groped her.