Anxiety Support Group
Anxiety is a physical condition marked by intense and persistent feelings of distress, fear, angst or dread. General anxiety caused by routine day-to-day stresses usually passes quickly and is experienced by almost everyone at one time or another. However, such feelings that linger over time and are very difficult to cope with, and which lack a clear cause, may indicate...
Geez today has taken a turn for the worst. Just making this post because I know I am gonna need some kind of support tonight. Just a little bit ago someone wrecked right beside my house AGAIN. This has happened like 4 times this year and multiple times every single year. We think the person might've passed away because the ambulance drove away slowly in the direction of the hospital. Not the first time we think someone passed in a wreck around here. It's so scary knowing that someone just like left the earth right by my house I don't like to think about death it scares me. And people are constantly wrecking their cars around here they drive way too fast over the hill or they take the turn too quick. I'm just reslly on edge I don't even want to take lake out because I don't want to be around that.
Even scarier I am always seeing people on their phones as they drive by my house. Every single day I see it and so many people on motorcycles without helmets. Last night was hard enough, now having to think about this I know I'm gonna have another difficult one. The beginning of the day went okay ish at least but also not so much.
I'm supposed to have a cake done for my dad's gf's daughter for her birthday by the 15th. Just baked two layers of it and they are too soft I don't know if I'll be able to trim them and that is an important part of it because if it's not level it falls over. Also there are browned/burnt edges that need to be taken off or it'll ruin the taste. So I'm upset about that. I've felt sick/out of it all day but just kept pushing through anyway. Now I don't really have much to show for it. Once the cakes are in the freezer for a while I'll try to trim them but I'm not sure how that's gonna go. I have two more layers to bake (one at a time bc I only have one of the 9x2 pans) and I have to make buttercream and decorate it. I really don't want to disappoint anyone I'm kinda nervous for this. So yeah idk how this is gonna go but I am hoping for the best
Really just scared for tonight because night time has been awfully hard for me lately. I get paranoid and anxious and my thoughts just clog up my head. The only thing that helps me get to sleep is lake being in here with me but he doesn't like sleeping in here some times. I think he gets too hot because he likes to burrow under the blankets. Last night it took me three tries to get him to lay down and go to sleep in here but once he finally did I was able to sleep good. Dreams have been affecting me a lot more than usual. Most of the time they don't bother me a lot but when I'm in a sensitive place mentally they scare me a lot more.
So yeah, like the title thing says, just asking for support before it's needed because I reading people's comments on here when I'm really doing badly has been helpful a lot of the time.
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I don't really know how to label this but I having a rough week and I can't say it's one thing.... I have a lot on my plate which is nothing new and I try to cope in many positive ways and do but I still have my moments.My kids more so my daughters talk to me about everything which I know it's cause of comfort and we are close.... however I really struggle with the venting about their dad which...
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I did the dumbest thing today. I charged my earbuds, unplugged the block and put the block in my little bag instead of the earbuds. I wasn't happy about that when I got to the gym. What a dummy!
Sorry about the wrecks. That is something difficult to take in a area where you live.
Can you rest?
I've always been very skittish about posting in the support groups because I worry about clogging up people's feeds, my problems not being important enough, etc.. instead, I confine myself to that only appear on my profile. When I see your posts popping up week by week with people supporting you, it gives me hope that maybe I can be comfortable asking for help like that too.
Oh and, I bake too, and if it makes you feel better I could tell you about my cake disaster from a couple days ago. It was supposed to be a vanilla spongecake with strawberry jam and banana cream. The first problem was that I'd run out of sugar, so I had to substitute corn syrup. I think you need grain sugar to whip up the eggs in a spongecake, so I had to add baking powder to keep the cake airy. I was seriously rushing with this cake, so I didn't level the tops of the layers, and I popped them in the freezer for 15 minutes before frosting them. It looked fine at first, until the heat inside the cake made the cream slooooowwwly melt... out of the middle of the cake.... down the sides.... all over the counter. The jam came with it. The slope of the unleveled cake also made it worse. It was so pretty too! Argh! I spent a little while 'fixing' it by scooping and smoothing everything back around the cake, it still looks like a nightmare but at least it tastes alright
In my experience browned edges/bottom don't affect the taste all that much? Unless they're legitimately burnt, I personally never bothered to cut those off, I'd say that's more going for a professional bakery look. Levelling can be stressful, I've heard that resting your knife on something about the height you want to trim can get you an even trim.
Keep venting. Vent freely. Vent often.
For what it's worth
My favorite name for the aesthetic disasters from the master bakers in my family tree is, "Lava Cakes." They look like erupted volcanoes but they are all the more nummy for the touch of chaos and the reminder that even Masters are still human.
And I'm so sorry your cake fell apart! I made a cake the other day and didn't level it so it slowly started to slope over and it was so ugly. Never skipping that again. Failing is a part of the process though and it helps you learn. And at least it tasted good! I feel like taste is almost more important than looks. Like what are you supposed to do with a pretty cake that tastes horrible?
And even though I do mess us sometimes, it still always comes out pretty delicious so I guess it's okay. I just get so worked up about everything being perfect sometimes.