CrimsonTears's Posts | DailyStrength

Status: things are looking up

Mood: Horrible

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24 days

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i havent cut for 24 days i cant believe ive actually made it this long... yesterday my flashbacks were really really bad and i was to the point i was holding a knife to my wrist but i didnt do it and im glad i didnt... i got my medicine yesterday...
idk

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i wanna do something if i stay here any longer im gonna freak out and cut but i have nowhere to go
last min miracle

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he was called into work so he couldnt go to grandmas party so i didnt have to see him
idk anymore... im done

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my doctor called and cancelled our appt so i dont have meds til the 30th and its only been 2 days and im already wanting to die but i cant let anyone know cuz i hate hospitals and im scared theyd lock me up if i tell... ive been trying so hard to...
idk anymore... im done

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my doctor called and cancelled our appt so i dont have meds til the 30th and its only been 2 days and im already wanting to die but i cant let anyone know cuz i hate hospitals and im scared theyd lock me up if i tell... ive been trying so hard to...
what if its not

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my memories have been coming to me slowly the past couple years as dreams or flashbacks but he denies it ever happened and what if it didnt? How can I be sure? I know something happened but what if it was consentual just like mom told me?
overwhelmed

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idk what to do anymore with all the emotional stress from my past and noe the financial problems im to the point that nothing truly makes me happy. i even blew off ryan cuz i wasnt in the mood to be loved on. seperately my issues are manageable but...
GOOD NEWS

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due to rain our easter get together was canceled so i dont have to see him until april 6th!!!!!!! hopefully ill be better prepared by then and ill have my new meds and possibly someone to go with me for protection and my own sanity
flashbacks

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last night i had the worst one ive ahd in a LONG time i woke up feeling him all over me and feeling dirty and i just wanted to get him off of me any way i could but no matter what i couldnt cuz hes in my head. He wont leave. I cant make him go away....
love? i just wrote this 2 min. ago

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Will you still love me if i dont always look this wayWill you still love me when my hair turns greyWill you still love me when there are wrinkles on my faceWill you still love me when age slows my paceWill you love me when my moods switchWill you...
love? i just wrote this 2 min. ago

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Will you still love me if i dont always look this wayWill you still love me when my hair turns greyWill you still love me when there are wrinkles on my faceWill you still love me when age slows my paceWill you love me when my moods switchWill you...
love? i just wrote this 2 min. ago

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Will you still love me if i dont always look this wayWill you still love me when my hair turns greyWill you still love me when there are wrinkles on my faceWill you still love me when age slows my paceWill you love me when my moods switchWill you...
suicide

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Sweet sweet freedom From a life of pain Gone forever Not to be hurt again They search for their baby girl But they will never find her Shes gone, left this place Shes never coming back If they look hard enough They might find traces But shes gone...
poetry and stuff

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i have alot of poems and stuff i wrote i just added alot of em to my journal if you all want to read them theres only 1 marked only friends and that is my whole story... its very detailed anyway so i doubt any1 wants to see it
poetry and stuff

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i have alot of poems and stuff i wrote i just added alot of em to my journal if you all want to read them theres only 1 marked only friends and that is my whole story... its very detailed anyway so i doubt any1 wants to see it

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