shendelzare
Status: Insanity: doing the same stupid shit over n over expecting different outcomes
Mood:
Good
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- Shendelzare here Im a heroin addictIve been sober for over six months now since my last relapse and I get that feeling like its that time of year again where I slip up. I am going back home after a while now and I cant stop thinking about getting...
- Oh god I feel so miserable I feel like crying and yelling at God I had only just gotten out of my depression and my mood was soo good these last few weeks but now I'm going down I can feel it no matter how hard I try to stay afloat its like a big...
- Yippie Kie yayy mother fuckers My moods swung again ive gone into full blown mania. It happened late last night, the crying the cutting I cried my eyes out and slashed myself like I was jack the ripper but its done its over.Weepy bitchy moany Shendy...
- I'm having one of my hissy fits. I feel like screaming myself hoarse I might quit my job and leave the business for good. I feel like the disease has won and Ive lost its just sapped everything out of me all the joy, my boyish charm my larger than...
- Sigh its been nearly four months now and my mood still hasnt shifted, this is the longest a spell of depression has last. Makes me think of game of thrones how the seasons there last for years, its winter in my life these days. Everything feels...
- So this friend of mine got married recently and I gave him some money. When I gave him the money I joked that "dont spend it on heroin please, I want your wife to like me, so that ten years from now you guys will take my kids and my widow to the zoo...
- I wanna live in a fantasy word and have big fights of good versus evil and and I wanna be on evils side but with good inside me. Like deep down inside and then I wanna be turned over to goods side and help good win.Oh god I need to stop watching...
- Its 5 40 AM, its been a very rough couple of weeks or months I cant be sure I lost track a long time ago. My room has a lingering smell of stale air and cat piss, a smell that seems to bother everyone else yet I cannot even discern anymore. I havent...
- Okay so I finally got off my ass and took a shower and went out with my dad for a little while yesterday. We went for a walk and talked and laughed and shot the shit but i still kept feeling weary the whole time but when I came home i was absolutely...
- I havent left my room in over a week, I dont eat I sleep over 14 hours a day I do no work, I last few days i havent even gotten up to feed my cats. I cant keep going on like this I need to get up shower do something anything but i just cant i cant...
- Ohhh my god I feel so weepy and bitchy moany and i dont feel like getting out of bed. Last night I watched chronicles of narnia and i started crying like with tears when the witch killed aslan. And if you know me im not a very weepy kind of guy i...
- Iv never written in this group before and im not sure if i even fit in here but thats just me being an addict in denial. I need to stop the fuck cutting myself I tried to kill myself last night one of many attempts and i made a huge scene friends...
- ohh my god ya'll that movie is off the hook its soooo methe pills, the being bloated and foggy the mood swings its freaky
- I dont mean to brag well not really I do mean to brag amongst other things.I just bought a 1000 dollar laptop brand new, and not just a laptop I bought a gaming mouse, a USB, an external hard drive, a laptop bag everything whole nine yards. I also...
- okay so not sure if this is relevant here but I HAD HAD HAD TO TELL YOU GUYS :Dits been almost a year since im sober, over one year since i last tried to kill myself and was institutionalized havent obsessed about the ex girlfriend in over a...