1) If anyone calls me fuck'n HUBBY again I will knock the shit out of them. I hate that derogatory term. The one guy would always ask if it was ok with hubby. God, I hate that word! I'm that scared that if someone called me that all of this hate would be unleashed at once.
2) This damn computer. I can't stand to see her type on it. It's like reliving it! Gross!
3) She dosen't call me any pet names. I hear babe all the time tv, movies and I cringe.
4) I also spell everthing out. no short cuts
5) also special days while this was going on.

*If I see anyone that looks like her. Or has her mannerism...
*My memories (she used to be a friend)
*When my H is on the computer (myspace thing...)

I had thought I was mostly over it and we're getting along well then I was at the park with my son and a girl there was totally like her. I was so upset. It all came flooding back. I was able to get over it SO much quicker than before. It feels good to not let it get the best of me for too long.

1. October through January 17th during the affair
2. January 24th...the last email that was sent her begging him to leave me...
3. My birthday January 27th the weekend after the last email...and it wasn't that great of a birthday...
4. Valentine's Day...the day the whore called me
5. Texting...the only way she could be in his life before and after work and weekends.
6. Pictures of my h's penis by text...he only sent her one but way gross...luckily he used to send me a bunch so it wasn't new I guess.
7. Our new house where I spent my nights painting and getting it ready for the holidays while he had his private email.
8. My backyard that I helped landscape with him while he ran to home depot by himself to see her.
9. The color blue their code word by text for I'm thinking of you.
10. All holidays between October 1 and Valentine's Day...especially Thanksgiving since he fucked her for the first time the following week.
11. California where he went on a business trip with her and they spent three nights in a cheesy hotel fucking.
12. My husbands Truck...where she sat her fat ass...oh ya he sold it since I would no longer ride in it...no longer a problem.
13. My husbands nickname he's been called since he was a child...I have chosen to no longer say it and I chose to tattoo his full first and middle name which I gave him before we got married.
14. My husbands desk that he fucked the whore against...he's working on getting a new one...luckily there is a new office location now even though it is near the old one.
15.A million other things...but one last one...my husband and his penis...he put my name on him which helps...now I want it on his penis :)

hugs - Tweedsie :)

1.her name 2.The song "low" They love to dance to it 3. The fucking bar 4.her damn face every time it flashes in my head 5.cheating glorified on TV,SONGS,COUTRY MUSIC ETC ETC.... 6.His friends and family that cheered him on 7.Him drinking Boy I messed this up but I think you guys can still read it. theres more but I guess thats enough.

Good one Linda I forgot her name...but I hate her fucking name so much so that I don't think I can watch survivor this time around since they have a jackie...however, she spells it differently so maybe I will.

So here's a funny...tman's whore was jackie and my ons was daniel and tman has a shirt I got him from Vegas without even thinking of it that is a jack daniels shirt...so it's covered with jack and daniels...lol. We both looked at the shirt and noticed at the same time and thought that's so fitting...break out the alcohol...lol.

Hugs - Tweedsie :)

1. Valentine's Day - I found out 4 days before and then he left me a card using my full name on that day.
2. our anniversary - Next Friday
3. South Philly - where she lives and took him to her house
4. His school - where they met
5. Wdddings, weddings, weddings. i hate them now. I can't have a good time
6. porn becuase during this time another woman was emailing him some graphic stuff. he never really looked at it before.

1.The ymca where he met his whore
2. The restaurant where they went for coffee and the parking lot where they went parking
All three places which are right downtown 5 minutes away and can't be avoided, ughhhh
3. Valentines coz he bought two cards, how f***ing sweet
4. January through June and all the things we did during that time which was his affair
5.New Years the day he told me he wasn't in love with me anymore
6.Her name- thank god I never met her and don't have to see her face in my mind
Of course who knows I could be seeing her and not even know it- I'm sure he wouldn't tell me
7.Blondes- sorry but I'm a brunette and he always said he preferred brunettes so a f***ing blonde? I can't stand blond hair!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
8.The Pussycat Dolls and the song "Loosen Up My Buttons", It came out during that time and he was always singing it , doesn't mean anything I just can't stand hearing it

Lots more can't think of right now

One trigger down! Maybe even one and a half -

I asked H today not to use those text shortcuts anymore like u instead of you

And he said "Absolutely. I will not do that anymore. I am sorry and I don't want to do anything that will make you sad".

I was sort of shocked at how nice he was being about it.

And I also forced myself to stand in front of a victorias secret today and just STARE at the underwear photos - I'm trying to take away the power of that trigger --

LOL
I managed to not let it trigger me about the affair -- but it DID make me want to rush to the gym -- and never eat anything ever again!

What is it about Valentines Day? I left it out,Just because I didn't want to say it I guess. But H started his affair Valentines Day. Damn

Valentines Day!!! That is my worst one. Does anyone have any ideas for that one? I can't bear the thought of it. I was thinking maybe I should plan to do some charity work that day - gather some friends to help - Start a "Share the Love" drive and bring cards or chocolates or other silly VDay stuff to people who are sick or shut in or...?

If anybody has any ideas -- please add! I am a "planner" and I want to empower myself to have a good plan for VDay before it comes.

I hate thinking that I have so much to NOT look forward to this next year - too many "anniversaries" of the A. Sad...

I agree with morgan any ideas to get through Valentine's Day would be so helpful...I don't know maybe tman has some ideas...he's pretty good at making up...however...I have to share my Valentine's Day with you all.

I went to my office that morning and my office had more gifts in it than Xmas not just from tman but my parents as well who I work with...I had an orchid and balloons as well...at 11am I left my office and driving through the parking lot a huge black cat crossed my path and I thought it was odd...then I went to paradise cafe to big up tman's giant Vday cookie for him and his office and while waiting an 80 year old man passed out hit the floor with blood everywhere and ended up dying...I left once the fireman showed up...shaken I went to tman's office had lunch with him as the whore acted weird like always (now I know why)...then left back for work...I got to work my mom (my secretary) took the call and the whore asked for my name...my mom was in my office when I got it and the whore said are you ________ wife? I said yes who's this? and she said "you should know your husband has been having an affair" and hung up...well you all know the rest...how the hell do I move past that...my dad who is my boss already insisted I change offices so I no longer have the same view of the pretty tree they would shape like a heart for me in front of my window...but I have a better view of the flowers and not going in that office does help...sorry now I'm babbling...hugs!

We really should come up with a plan. Something we could do that would make it something special for someone who really needs it. I like Morgan's idea. I couldn't handle anything from H I just couldn't. This is a good one think over girls. Too bad we all don't live closer lol We'd have us a V-day blow out party!!!!!!! lol I don't think they could handle us all in one place anyway,lol

1. Any Polish woman.
2. Anyone with breast EE.
3. January 16th (daughter's birthday they slept together...nice!
4. November 9th - other daughter's birthday party he said he had to work so he could be with her. Missed the whole party.
5. August 16th - her birthday, they slept together.
6. June 11 - first time they slept together
7. Vegas - her and I went away together there during the A (bitch).
8. October 16th - they screwed in my house while I was away.
9. Tomatoes.
10. WH's blackberry.
11. When WH goes to work (they still work together).

Many many more....like someone else said, gets you angry just thinking about them all.

I'm too drunk to think straight. sorry

Ha - good one Tweeds. I would love to get property of Ami (not real name) tatooed on my Hs dick. Your mention of the blue thing reminded me of another.

12. Saying "I sent you flowers" which was there cutesy way of saying I was thinking of you (gag). She would always say thanks for the flowers meaning thoughts.