Infidelity Support Group
Any relationship in which one partner engages willfully in sexual relations with another outside of the partnership is considered to have experienced infidelity. This breach of trust is often traumatizing for the faithful partner as well as the relationship, and support is often needed to heal emotionally and to decide whether or not the relationship should continue after...
So I cheated. Not intentionally, black out drunk, caught in the act. No memory. Worst night of my life. Partner who I adore is disgusted with me.
expressed deep remorse. Been as open as possible. Joined drinking support group. She has access to all my social media and phone. ALways has. Left around unlocked. Never had any secrets.
she says she doesn’t hate me, she hates what I did. Says we can get through it. Can’t look at me, won’t permit me to touch her. Not sexually, just in comfort.
i am not having an affair. Had no desire to be with anyone else. Never have. She is my world. I am disgusted at what happened. Didn’t eat for a week afterwards. Was assaulted by my priest ast age of 11. Feels the same.
i have deeply wounded the person I care about the most. We have our issues like everyone else. But in nearly losing her, I know I can’t lose her.
please tell me, how can I help her heal?
should I be manly and force her to hug me? She is very independent and think she would punch me. I have moved to another room, should I just stay in there for a few days and let her process?
i would rather die that cause her any more pain. But I think staying is hurting her and cruel.
I would be grateful for any advice
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I'm horrified! I knew my insurance would go up due to getting a new car but I didn't expect it to go up over $2,000. I did have an accident with the snow/ice in the winter. I was just telling my brother that I have had my car since March 2, 2026 and have only spent $75 on an oil change. Now this! I called another insurance company and their quote was over $4,000. I guess I have to pay...
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It's a difficult time for both of you.
Have you looked into any counseling, therapy, talking to a pastor (that's free).
I do think she will need her own individual counseling. That is often the case in infidelity. Both people need counseling when someone cheats.
Have you checked out any therapists? You can look them up online. They can do video or phone sessions (due to Coronavirus).
My partner does have access through work. We have had non related challenges in the past and are kind of jaded about how useful therapy is. Well not therapy, but if you get a bad therapist it can make things worse.
I’m using this group and my alcohol support group primarily. It seems to Ben helping and clarifying my thoughts.
I have realised I was pushing the blame onto others for what happened. Truth is, it was my decisions that caused this rift. No one forced me to drink and lose control of the situation.
I did this hurtful thing. I have accepted that. All I want now is to help my beloved heal.
I have cut friends out of my life that are heavy drinkers, this being our commonality. I have cut friends out of my life who disprove of her. Our relationship is my top priority. I can always get new friends. I can’t get another her.
I have joined a secular sobriety group and started daily meetings. I tell her, probably too frequently that I love her, that for me there is no choice but to be with her. That even after 20 years she still takes my breath away. Luckily I have always told her things like this, so part of her knows it’s true.
But I don’t want her to forgive because she feels harassed or worn down. I want us to move past this because we love each other. That she knows it was a one time error. That I never would done this as the person I am.
I genuinely look forward to a life of sobriety. I look forward to making her feel so secure that she never has to mistrust or doubt me again.
But only if that is what she wants
It's just that, what happened with you two is so big... between what happened when you passed out drunk, and her emotional affairs... that it is going to be really tough to fix all of this without some kind of professional counseling.
I wish you the best.