I see both sides to this. Sex DOES lead to babies, the condom might break, so it IS important to be thinking of the person you're with in future terms. However, there isn't going to BE a future unless you enjoy the here and now. I'd say relax and enjoy the here and now. The only religion that should be thought of on a date is the religious use of strong, sturdy condoms like Trojan Magnums.

I'm Just a christian and me being single in the dating world, let me rephrase that I haven't put myself out there. I'm not a holy roller but I do have christian values. I have respect and morals for myself. I am human and mess up daily, If you meet someone that you are interested in get to know her if its to uncomfortable for you than it's not for you. Just take a leap you never know you might find something so amazing that you didn't even know you needed. Just don't let religion stop you. I just want more people in my life that are compassionate and have faith.

"It gets lonely, and frustrating, being so moral but it's difficult to change beliefs you've had all your life."

WHOA! It deleted the rest of my comment! Anyway the quote I put is the epitome of religion. If you follow what I do and say they you are moral and if you don't then you are immoral. lol I also have to say I grew up hardcore Christian. I was very involved in the church. I don't think it is hard to change the views you have had your entire life when you open your eyes and wake up. More like coming out of a dream, out of a fog. This isn't as long as I wrote last time, but long story short, to each his own and we have to learn to own our own!!! :D

The purpose of dating is to relax, get comfortable and get to know someone. Religion in general tends to be a very inflammatory topic, which is anything but relaxing and tends to kill that relaxed vibe on a date. If you're both fully relaxed and cuddling somewhere, and you feel like you can broach the subject of how they feel about religion without them squirming, becoming uncomfortable or getting dedensive, especially right before you both feel stimulated enough to get into an intimate encounter, do it. You probably won't have sex, because religion and sex outside of marriage don't mix, and the topic of religion kills any sexy vibe, but you will at least be able to see where each other's heads are on the topic.

Kiss first! If there's electricity in the kiss, you can bet there will be the impetus of excitement to move the relationship forward despite possibly differing religious views. Jesus wants us to experience sexual magic and go at it like rabbits, in marital wedlock!

love your post

Oh you bible thumpers....you make me laugh. To each his own! Love Love!

To each thier own, so that means that my morals are how I define them, each and every person has thier own code,

Ok

So when two people are dating do they put their own code put there,

Ahhhhh

Reality is that regardless of from where ones moral code comes from
-often is not put out on the open
- and often "we" hold the person we are dating up to this code but maybe not "ourselves" which is purely not put out there

Being honest about morality is the bigger issue

My first day on here and I'm called a bible thumper. I dont push my faith on anyone. I Love Christ and i"m a sinner who stuggles just like many. Is this a place of strength or place of cut downs?.

Well lets be fair, it's not just a particular religion.that can make one feel they are moral while others are not. Sheesh, ANY BELIEF a person or group holds can and often does make them feel morally superior. Look at politics. I know liberal people and conservative people who all think they are moral, all think they are more righteous than the other.

I think with respect to.what the OP posted, be honest with yourself about what you believe, what you hold sacred, whatever it may be. Get right with yourself first and foremost. Be comfortable and at peace in your own mind, body and spirit. I thonk that may help ease your anxiet and feeling conflicted.

Since when are the only options with dating either hunting for a spouse or hunting for casual sex? There's a whole spectrum in between.that I think doesn't require so much pressure. Maybe it can simpley be getting to know another person, regardless of where it may lead.

I am a Christian and to be one requires that the values you try and live by are bigger than you

I think that a person can have a different basis for a value system but I am leary of people that see themselves as bigger than a fundemenral set of right and wrong

And I don't see how any of southern livings comments warrant being called a bible thumper

Fundamental right and wrong, agree. Like don't kill people, cheat on your spouse, steal, etc. Religion and belief didn't corner the market on basic decency.

Me personally, I don't think two single people having sex with each who do not have immediate plans to spend their lives together other means that they're going to burn in hell.

And yeah I didn't get the bible thumper comment either. I think it has been a pretty well rounded discussion actually.

rmb: I couldn't agree more, don't feel two people coming together and having sex outside of marriage is a sin, in fact I think it's indeed God at work, because He doesn't like His children, us flesh and blood mortals, to be alone. He has designed us to come together fully in sex. Marriage is really designed to provide structure, security and stablity for children conceived from sex. But that structure, security and stability has to come from the mind, heart, motivations, intentions, not from a piece of paper. I think two people can love each other and even love each other's children outside of a piece of paper that says they're married.

In my opinion, religion is your ultimate framework from which you view things and from which you approach the world.

The trick in relationships is to find someone whose worldview matches yours. Because we differ so much in the details, we need to date to get to know the details of the person. Not to mention we are usually going through massive hormone surges that make us overlook the other person's faults...it takes time to get through that and actually understand someone.

Southern, I'm sorry I offended you with my bible thumper comment and I am sorry to anyone else who took that offensively. I really did not mean it in a derogatory way, it is just what I call hardcore Christians who very obviously look only at the bible. I grew up a Christian, so it's just my funny thing that I say. Yall made me laugh because I smiled and thought this was a funny thread. Mainly because people get so defensive and hardcore over something so silly. lol. I agree that it is not just Christianity, but any religion where one person or book states how everyone should live and every individual person looks to another human "in power" to tell them what to do, how to live, and how to interpret what they read. When I said to each his own, I mean that yes, everyone defines their standards for dating themselves. A lot of people look to someone else to define how they should be living or what morals they should be living by. I am speaking in terms of marriage, love and life. What I say by to each his own, is that every person is an individual must decide what is comfortable for themselves in their life. One person may be comfortable sleeping with people while they are just dating, one person may not. One person may sleep with someone on the first date and it may take another person six months of dating before they are comfortable entering into that zone. It is up to each person listen to their intuition and know what works for them in each situation. The whole thing is, who is anyone to tell someone else what is moral (when it comes to dating and sex) and what isn't. Each person is an individual with different comfort levels and living different lives. No one path is right for everyone. Putting everything else aside, we are all human and of the human race. No matter what we believe, the same thing is going to happen to all of us and we are of the same spirit. We were all made the same and will all leave this planet the same. It's like a giant forest with a clearing in the middle. All the while we are on our path, we may look at everyone else and think that they are on the wrong path or going the wrong way when theirs twists and turns, but ultimately each path leads to the clearing in the middle of the forest and it is only then that we realize that everyone else was exactly on the path they needed to be on and it all led to the same place.