Families of SOs Community Group
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Why does no one care?
The registry is unfair, there is no question about it. It is supposedly a civil regulatory scheme to protect the public. To those of us who live or have lived it know in reality it is actually additional punishment, ostracizing us even further from society that we wish would embrace us again. To allow us to return to our lives--we know we made horrendous choices that impacted our victims, our families and ourselves but when will it ever be enough? What if the thing you hated most about yourself was constantly being brought up to you? What if the government and other people made it your identity? An identity that you could never escape, a punishment that never ended, punishing not only you but also everyone else who cares about you?
Why does no one care?
Why does the Supreme Court of the United States not step in and shut down these ex post facto punishments?
Why do politicians keep on enacting more and more draconian laws?
Why do people look at us like monsters?
You have to understand, that in comparison to the plight victims have our plight looks negligible. We look silly for complaining about what is happening to us when 1 in 4 girls is being abused by the time they are 18. Whether the punishment is fair or not, we still committed the crime. When they compare us against victims we will lose every single time! Even though two wrongs do not make a right, one wrong was unquestionably worse and that was our own wrong, whatever crime that landed us on the registry in the first place.
What position could we possibly take to change the public perception about us?
Now I am not saying this will be easy, or will happen any time in the next 30 years, but we must do this. We must be willing to care more about others well being than our own if we are ever to have any hope of fixing this mess. Our message to the public cannot be that the registry is unfair, no one wants to hear about our hardships. No one cares. Let me say that again, no one cares.
Our message must be that the registry actually creates more victims. People must know that our policy as a society does not allow or makes it very difficult for RSOs to reintegrate back into society. Research shows that reintegration is a key factor in keeping RSOs from reoffending.
So why does no one care? Because by saying how bad it is for sex offenders it allows everyone else to compare how bad it is for sexual abuse victims and we lose every time. Our mantra cannot be poor sex offenders, our mantra must be NO MORE VICTIMS! Only by placing others above ourselves will we ever have any hope of intelligence winning out over emotion.
The registry is unfair, there is no question about it. It is supposedly a civil regulatory scheme to protect the public. To those of us who live or have lived it know in reality it is actually additional punishment, ostracizing us even further from society that we wish would embrace us again. To allow us to return to our lives--we know we made horrendous choices that impacted our victims, our families and ourselves but when will it ever be enough? What if the thing you hated most about yourself was constantly being brought up to you? What if the government and other people made it your identity? An identity that you could never escape, a punishment that never ended, punishing not only you but also everyone else who cares about you?
Why does no one care?
Why does the Supreme Court of the United States not step in and shut down these ex post facto punishments?
Why do politicians keep on enacting more and more draconian laws?
Why do people look at us like monsters?
You have to understand, that in comparison to the plight victims have our plight looks negligible. We look silly for complaining about what is happening to us when 1 in 4 girls is being abused by the time they are 18. Whether the punishment is fair or not, we still committed the crime. When they compare us against victims we will lose every single time! Even though two wrongs do not make a right, one wrong was unquestionably worse and that was our own wrong, whatever crime that landed us on the registry in the first place.
What position could we possibly take to change the public perception about us?
Now I am not saying this will be easy, or will happen any time in the next 30 years, but we must do this. We must be willing to care more about others well being than our own if we are ever to have any hope of fixing this mess. Our message to the public cannot be that the registry is unfair, no one wants to hear about our hardships. No one cares. Let me say that again, no one cares.
Our message must be that the registry actually creates more victims. People must know that our policy as a society does not allow or makes it very difficult for RSOs to reintegrate back into society. Research shows that reintegration is a key factor in keeping RSOs from reoffending.
So why does no one care? Because by saying how bad it is for sex offenders it allows everyone else to compare how bad it is for sexual abuse victims and we lose every time. Our mantra cannot be poor sex offenders, our mantra must be NO MORE VICTIMS! Only by placing others above ourselves will we ever have any hope of intelligence winning out over emotion.
need to fund their budgets and they do that by keeping people afraid of what will happen if they don't have 'protection' That we should spend out time attacking the high cost (to the taxpayer) of misguided legislation and all the bloated budgets supporting thousands of "public' employees, and the waste of tax dollars.
For example NV had developed a pretty effective (and in my opinion sufficiently onerous) Registry all on it's own. But now Nevadans are on the hook for millions of dollars to fully implement the 'new' but not improved AWA/SORNA Registry. Maybe sending letters to the editor etc pointing out the the "Old' NV Registry was not brokenso why spend millions to implement the Fed version which (and compared to the 'old NV Rgistry Developed by NV for NV ) this costly FED version not only has serious defects but robs $$$$ from education and infrastructure (roads and bridges) and new job development while the salaries of all these 'professional 'protectors' reach astronomical heights (for example in Or the prison guard's union is the largest and highest paid entity e=while ordinary people pray for a minuscule increase in the minimum wage.
Any one of us who lives in of the 35 States ( not fully in compliance with the AWA Registry) should write letters in support of continued NON-compliance with new and not improved AWA Registry.
Any one living in one of the 23 states that do not have Civil Commitment for felons should fight to defeat civil commitment becoming an extension of the prison system. And fight these things by pointing out that what they already have is working and if it 'ain't broke' do not install the hugely expensive and un-necessary "fix'
There are people in every state who are against bloated and wasteful government budgets that sack up tax money and do nothing more than pay bureaucrats and steal money from programs and services that we all agree need money. We need to join our letters to theirs pointing out that we all are being frightened into paying out tax dollars to fix what isn't broken just for the sake of "fashions' in protection that make other rich but don't protect any better that the old tried and true.
The Pharisees many have taken over the temple (of justice) but we should not be too discouraged, depressed or frightened to at least point out the fallacy of buying them new fancy robes and whips Registries every year shouldn't we?
The lawmakers, our leaders, and the general public could not care less about sex offenders or registrants or how they are treated. They do not care if we have any constitutional rights; if they had their way, we would all be locked up in prison. This is how many citizens perceive us.
The politicians will not some day in the future say, "Gee whiz. We have been so unfair with these laws, while stripping these sex offender registrants of their rights. We need to let up and give them a break with more sensible laws." That will never happen.
But one thing that is universally understood is money. One way that advocacy can possibly be effective is if we can show the politicians---and the taxpayers---that their money is being wasted on the registry and all these restrictive laws. Remind them that the wasted money is robbing their children of the funds for education and that the money can better be spend elsewhere.
Attacking the laws from an economic standpoint rather than a humanitarian standpoint might be more successful.
rewdiazepam
The point is not to get 'them' to 'care,' or shed alligator tears. The point is that they are wasting tax-payer dollars, feathering their own nests in the 'justice system-prison industrial complex" and in the process, robbing ALL the children they claim to protect, of education and support services families desperately need to help all children grow up into sound, caring adults.
The only way we get the general public to see their taxpayer dollars are not wasted on the registry is if they believe sexual abuse doesn't increase (with or without a registry) which it actually doesn't. If we see it increases as a result of the registry, it gives them more to fear and they'll be willing to shell out as many taxpayer dollars as they think is needed.
But not a bad thought, Janet. That does make sense