I don't think you meant this the way it sounded, you were just trying to help. thank you

well when you post something, especially in the crisis section, you NEED to THINK about what you post. i only see one way for that to be taken and it offends me.

Where are you donna? You put this post up 3 days ago and upset a lot of people, and you haven't been back to respond? Did something happen that prompted you to put this up? If so, at least have the decency to explain yourself so people don't think you're just an unfeeling uncaring person who thought it would be fun to rattle peoples' cages.

I know the feeling of thinking that suicide is the coward's way out, my ex husband committed suicide a few months ago and I'm still struggling with why. But HE never talked to me,or anyone else as far as I know, to say that he felt this way. I was angry, and now my feelings are different. I'm still upset that I didn't know things were so bad with him, but I no longer want to call him a coward.

So what is this about, really? I'd like to understand.

I know you're trying to help DonnaB49, but you said some things that are just wrong. I survived my suicide attempt and am glad that I did. But mine was not the act of a coward (it actually took a lot of courage on my part) nor was I a quitter. My attempt was the culmination of a series of events in my life at that time; I felt that I had no control over events. If I had had more support from my family and friends, I could have faced my problems as I am now. I could have taken control in a positive way instead of a negative way. But that wasn't how things were then. As I said, your intentions may have been good, but your method is very hurtful.

my baby sister was 32 and she took an overdose of pills and died. i watched her for months as she suffered the worst depression in this life. we did all we could and it was still not enough. she tried and tried to make it. she was not a quitter. she struggled like nothing i have ever seen. yes, she left us with pain and unbearable lose of her presence. yet, i know what she endured all those months until she could no longer stand the pain. to me she was the bravest girl i ever knew. i am not saying suicide is the answer. of course it isn't.!! however, sometimes the pain is just to much . i have been on the verge of it several times. i would never believe a person to be a coward in this condition. i see that person as hurting so badly that it is all they can think of to make the pain stop. this was my sister. she was beautiful and the most courageous person i ever knew. she was a fighter. she fought until she could fight no more. i see her as my guardian angel today as i think about her...

ANYONE besides me think that DonnaB MIGHT be talking to herself?!!!!
I agree with Most of you.
I DID notice that this post got more DISCUSSION than a LOT of others: got you to thinking and talking--DIDN'T IT?
I TRY--and I DON'T ALWAYS--but I TRY-- to read someone's profile BEFORE I comment.

Sometimes--what SEEMS-- judgmental--is an act of EXTREME bravery on someone's part. Sometimes--a person may not TALK to anyone--EXCEPT--to yell for help when there is a FIRE!
AND--WE NEED TO REMEMBER ON HERE: SOME OF US (Myself included) have a MENTAL ILLNESS--and SOMETIMES (as it does with me) that means that we have LOUSY social skills.
Being KIND when we are hurting--isn't easy.
I have had MANY MOMENTS when I thot that an automatic weapon would "solve" my pain and problems-- and I have had SOME moments when enuff explosive to blow up FOR KNOX would be too little--
IT TOOK TIME to get past that and THROUGH that!
YOU DO ALL REALIZE THAT I AM TRYING TO SEDATE YOU WITH ALL THIS CHATTER DON'T YOU?

You may have a point, dzinfizz. However, Donna's profile states that she's living alone since her mother passed on - why then would she talk about upsetting family?
As I said in my previous post on this thread, I think Donna's intentions are good, but the message came through as less than helpful.

Donna, you have my sympathy for your loss. You are right, suicide is not the answer, but suicide is not the act of a quitter or a coward. That part of the equation you got wrong.

donna i really can't believe what i just read from you in this post.and you call yourself a christian.how dare you call anyone a coward or the other names that you called us.my mom killed herself last year and you have just called her a coward!!she was a fighter,a survivor and she was in so much pain that she made her decision to take her life.yes you have tried to destroy and dishonor anyone and everyone here.you need to stand back and regroup yourself.don't use the bible to attack people here,do you realize that it causes alot more damage and completely turns people away from God.i sure as hell don't want anyones blood on my hands and you shouldn't either.but you do.

I've been reading and rereading Donna's post. Part of me does wonder now if she is sort of reasoning "out loud." I don't think it's fair to say that those who consider or attempt suicide are cowards, quitters or selfish people. There have been times when I've contemplated it because I thought everyone else would be better off without me...that I would no longer be a burden. Currently, I still consider it once in a while, but not seriously--it's almost like a record that starts playing in my head even when I'm doing ok. I'm not planning anything so don't worry; I just wanted to add a comment. If Donna was not reasoning out loud, then the comment is not very nice. Perhaps someone in her life did commit suicide and as a result she is alone. I do think that it was a poor choice to post it in the crisis center and that such a post could trigger someone to act. There are many of us in the community who have considered\attempted suicide or have someone close to us\we know. I think that sometimes it is hard to get through each day or even each hour when it's a really low time. I think that it takes great strength to do this and I think that if someone chooses to take her or his own life it is a choice--even if you might not agree with it. As for all of the biblical stuff, I will paraphrase the following:

let ye who is without sin cast the first stone

judge not lest ye be judged

I'm not a religious fanatic (but I do remember some things from sunday school :) ; however, I do think that we should try to consider how our words\actions could influence someone...though I think everyone needs to vent sometimes. I hope this issue gets resolved so that everything is ok.

If you have ever been to the point of suicide, you would understand what it feels like. You believe that you are doing everyone a big favor if you kill yourself. You need help, but don't know where to turn. Don't judge people until you have lived in their shoes.

And, I forgot to add. Yes, I have tried to end my life.

i agree with neverwillgiveup. the way you worded it could cause someone to try suicide. you may not have control over your mind is thinking about suicide. i fight the thoughts of suicide every day. Just alittle judgemental there. have you ever thought of or tried suicide? then you should not condemn the ones that have.

I just wanted to add that since I responded to this yesterday, on and off this thread has been on my mind. It deeply bothers me. I wondered if someone has read the original post and been severely triggered -- well, I do know for a fact in one case that is true b/c I have been told that by someone. So, thank you for that. (sarcasm). You triggered someone who was already suicidal and they came to the crisis board and read this and you basically in an indirect way called them "a quitter, a coward, who can't face life." I will not state any details as not to expose this person, but I will only say it is due to fortunate circumstances this person is still alive right now. (Actually, including myself, you triggered at least 2 people)

I wanted to add this, as well. A few months ago, I walked into two different doctor's offices on the same day and told two different doctors I was suicidal and needed help and that I would kill myself. I had tears running down my face, hyperventilating, gave details of why I felt that way and how I would do it. Know what happened? Nothing. Know why? Money. I had no money needed for treatment so no one would help me. I was told to try to contact the health dept if it worsened "Next Monday" to TRY to set an appt with a counselor when one becomes available. The other doctor didn't even give a fuck.

When I reached out to my mom, I was told "there are days I wanna kill myself, too." My boyfriend mocked me basically. So, you know what, I don't feel I fell into any of those categories. But I'll be sure to tell my aunt whose son committed suicide years ago that her son is "a quitter, a coward, who" couldn't "face life."

"(Actually, including myself, you triggered at least 2 people)"

3.

I keep thinking about this thread too... I wish I could understand why you started it.

As a person with depression and MPD not only have I tried but have had parts try suicide. I'm glad we have failed, but there are times that we feel overwhelmingly that there is never going to be an end to the pain and suffering we experience on a daily basis. Medication does not work when it is a depression that is based on the things that have happened to us, that we can't forget, or the pain that remembering brings, as well as the shame and the horror of the things that went on. I don't want to hurt my family, but there are times that suicide does seem to be the only option I have to get away from these feelings.

My psychiatrist does know about it and we actually have a date in the future, after a certain event in our lives, that if things are not better, we will no longer agree to stay safe.

You do have the right to your opinion of course, I'm pretty certain you are thinking quite poorly of me at this point, but you have obviously never been to the point that suicide is your only way out of the the pain, so you shouldn't really comment on others feelings that you don't know about.
Karens10