Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
I feel like a complete failure. And there's so much wrong in my life. I don't even know if there's any good left.
I'm almost 20. I can't drive. Never really worked. Don't have a car. No license. I just go to school. Majoring in a major that I kind of hate but I'm staying in it bc if I go through with it and actually study I could make a bit of money later in life. But I hate this major. I hate studying, I don't even know if I can really do what I'm "studying" bc I cheat. And I always say I will study after the test or semester but never do.
I really want to sew clothes (I don't know how to but I feel I could learn). It genuinely intrigues me.
Anyway, I'm supposed to move into an apartment w/o my own transportation or job. And I know I could do it with student loans, but should I? And I feel I like shouldn't, but if I don't I feel like I would be betraying my friend. And I feel she, nor her ppl, would understand. Even after an explanation. Bc they have done so much for me. And I'm not their blood. But I feel like if I took a gap year from school right now, and I started working, in about a year most problems would go away. But people around me say no.
I want a job. So desperately. And I see my younger cousins thriving. Living life. I see ppl my age thrivingggg. And I'm just here. Feeling like a child. Not only at I struggling financially, I'm also struggling mentally and just with life period. I need more of a support system.
I also have had close family members to die. One being my gpa and the other being my g-gma. And Idk if I actually grieved. And now that my g-gma is gone, my family(immediate + cousins and uncles and everyone) is growing apart and I hate it.
As for the apartment situation, I want advice if you have any.
all of this genuinely taking a toll on me. And there's no way out. Talking abt it only does so much.
And I've been thinking about other ways (nothing illegal, just abnormal) to get necessaties but all the rumors and getting talked about is not something I can handle.
This didn't even touch on relationships and that area of life.
I feel so hopeless and I don't know what to do.
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I'm horrified! I knew my insurance would go up due to getting a new car but I didn't expect it to go up over $2,000. I did have an accident with the snow/ice in the winter. I was just telling my brother that I have had my car since March 2, 2026 and have only spent $75 on an oil change. Now this! I called another insurance company and their quote was over $4,000. I guess I have to pay...
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About the friend with the apartment, if you cannot afford to stay in a share arrangement with your friend, or that you cannot afford to pay for your own apartment, then deal with that reality and tell your friend so. Don't worry about embarrassment or loss of reputation with your friend, once you graduate and earn a good income, you can buy her lots of presents to make up for your insufficiency now. Don't pay attention to idle gossips. You have a plan, you don't have to explain yourself. Do what you feel need to be done.
Put an ad on the student bulletin board or look to see if any students are offering shared accommodation that you can afford, and move in with her/him. If you cannot afford to move out from home, by all means, stay at home with Mom and Dad. That will save a lot of money to buy textbooks. About commuting for 1 hour from home each way to go to College, that is nothing my dear. I traveled 2 hours from home to the University (and vice versa) either by car or by public transport each day. It was exhausting for me to commute to College each day because I was/am not a well person, but you are a young lady so this kind of exercise is nothing to you.
If you think such beginnings are too tough for you to surmount, wait till you study medicine or law, the obstacles in your way would be magnanimous. Other students before you can do it, and so you can too. Treat these difficulties as a test for the future ahead, I believe in you, so go out there tiger and grab those opportunities for your future. Good luck !
Not sure what your city is like, but you could put up flyers on telephone poles to contact you for one of these types of jobs. Or get the word out to family, friends, on social media... that you are available to do part time work. Having your own money will give you freedom.
Or is there somewhere near you, that you could walk to, to apply for a part time job? Such as a Starbucks, grocery store, fast food, retail job. None of these really require any previous experience.
Good luck! You can do it!
I don't know about the living situation or getting a job. Can you do work study or can you do something like clean homes or tutor. I did home cleaning a tutoring when I was in college as well as working as a maid in a motel. The maid just is pretty good because they usually are like 7 to 2pm. It's usually pretty easy to get that job. at least it was.
If you are interested in sewing why not give it a try. Can you afford a sewing machine? A class? If not, a youtube video or two. Might cheer you up to do something you actually like.
I'm sorry you are struggling now. Life is a struggle the whole way through and you are at a stage when you can try to build a foundation for a better life. If may feel awful now but it's only a few years of your life.
If you can't afford an apartment could you live in a coop or dorm or something. I wouldn't worry too much about what other people are doing, just go day by day. If you could talk to a counsellor it might help.
Write me if you want to. Good luck.