Don't be so hard on yourself. Each of us react differently when breakups come. Some, put on a good front as if the breakup doesn't bother them. In some cases, this is just a disguise to hide the hurt inside.

Some women are more emotional than others as well. Women are emotional beings. They want to know the whys and wherefores of things whereas a man, in many cases, will just go on and try to hide his true feelings by acting macho. It makes it easier for him to deal with a breakup.

You stated that you are obsessing over how you "failed another relationship". How do you know it was you who failed? There are 2 sides to every story in life. In some relationships, there is a communication breakdown. In some, emotional detachments follow this breakdown. In other cases, there may be infidelity of some sort which can contain a sexual affair, an emotional affair or some other outside temptation, fantasy or whatever.

"It's not fair" is a true statement. In many cases, life is not fair. Life at times is hard to deal with.
I don't know your age but, as you get older, you will better understand some of the things I have mentioned. In any relationship, there is a breakdown somewhere along the line. Breakups usually do not happen overnight. Hang in there and I am here if you need to converse further with me.

You feel this way because you loved DEEPLY. When you are so in love, that's going to take time to recover from. Like oldbiker said, some people seem to move on fast, put on a front, even move onto someone else but chances are they're not over it., they think it's the answer to recovering from the break up.. My ex did this and it felt so disrespectful to what we'd had. You'll recover in your own time. There's no timetable. Be kind to yourself.

i feel the same way. i feel life is over when i break up. i use to be healthy and have friends. all of a sudden i have no one. my family is all married with families. my friends are all in relationships in which i dont see them anymore... i have nothing.. and i dont want to move onto another guy.

Wow I really needed to hear I want the only one who felt this way. I'm 45 and lost, what I still believe is my soulmate. My therapist says he was my first TRUE LOVE At my age, I find that concept hard to swallow but I have come to accept that revelation. When you find someone who accepts you for who you are and there are no secrets or hidden agendas and he's everything you ever wanted (minus the addiction to sexting) it's so hard to LET GO. I'm only in my third month after I left him and I still struggle everyday. If you wanna chat let me know, but understand you're not alone.

I understand this feeling very well. I dated a guy for 5 years, graduated, then we broke up. It's now 3.5 years later and I still get so sad thinking about him. There's a part of me that knows it wasn't a good fit and and we were in different places. But since I've had no success with another serious relationship and have some pretty serious abandonment and trust issues it's hard to not want that back. My therapist said that it's natural to hurt more having anxiety and depression after a break up. She said it takes as long as it takes. At this point I fear I'll never get over it. Which is exactly what I said when we broke up. I'm sorry you're going through this. Hang in there!

Nothing in life last's forever. That's not the way it was designed. We suffer from the deaths of many people and things including relationships. I really believe that we must always cherish what we had but we must also look forward to what will come because I find that good things always come out of bad situations. The old saying, "God never closes one door without opening a better one" is very true and I have seen it happen many many times in my life. I think the worse thing we can do try to continue to live in the past.

My wife divorced me about 4 years ago, after a 24 year marriage and I told her, I just wanted her to be happy! If her new guy could make her happier then me then I was happy for her! I never lead her on that my insides were tearing me apart at the time. Long story short, about six months after the divorce, she wanted me back! Apparently, sex and life on the other side of the fence, wasn't what she thought it was. I had found happiness being single and getting to know myself better so I respectfully declined. Last I knew, she is still with him but not sure how happy they are.

So what I am saying is, Never shut the door on the future, Never shut the door on the unknown because you will probably like what you see when you open it and regret not doing so sooner!

God Bless

Trust me....you are not the only one. Maybe u just really put your heart into it! That will be awesome when you are with the right person. Someone that does the same!

I've been hurt so many times in love but I'd still like to believe that someday I can have something real. Please tell me it's not just a game :-O

You can be anything that you want to be. Seek help whether it be talking to someone like me on here (i have depression and seeking help to) or whether it be professional help. Focus on you and what makes you whole and what makes you strong. Find your inner strength and survive each day, each day is a battle but you can overcome your struggles.