A woman that is attracted to a married man that she knows is married is
hardly my definition of a grounded healthy minded woman,

Men run away from being attracted to a married woman because they dont want to get punched by the married womans husband.

The Separation dilemma has a bundle of crap that comes along with it..
What happened that you are separated?

Sometimes it is easier just to deal with coming to terms with what is
inevitable.

Instead of focusing on what he is doing- focus on what is the root of why
this is happening and what is your strategic plan for the both of you to
amend or close this chapter in your lives.

Wishing you clarity and positive energy as you process through. Hugs ; )

So sorry you are going through this. I kind of doubt he is out having "all this fun". And, like Osheana said, what kind of woman would even be interested in a (still) married man? Not any quality type of woman, probably, so please don't dwell on that part of it. Yes, you are indeed entitled to have some fun, too, absolutely! Does he take the kids part of the week? That's when you go do your thing! You need some fun nights out, too. Call your girlfriends and go out and have a night out. Dinner, dancing, maybe drinks if you do that, movie, shopping, etc. Go for it! :)

There are two people in every relationships or affair. Just because a woman is attracted to a married guy it doesn't make her a villain, because guess what if the guy doesn't take part in that attraction nothing will happen. People tend to forget that. There are never any guarantees in life. You need to take care of yourself. Do the things you like and love. Enjoy life. Men don't necessarily care if you are separated, it's just that most are not looking for serious relationships if they are single. The right person for you will find you when you are ready. Focus on yourself. And I am saying this because I am in the exact same situation. My husband is out there having fun (oh yes they are) and I am taking care of the house and the kids and everything else. Sadness and depression are normal, but don't let them win. Keep pushing forward and believe that it will get better.

I love you for being honest with this topic. I didn't know the seriousness of my behavior and the reasons why I behaved that way. I also had some friends that did what I was doing. I also realized later that we were not really authentic friends because there was no accountability and no wisdom among us. We were just "living life and having fun." That's not living life, that's making a mess of it with consequences to follow. If only my momma would have given me some wisdom all those years ago. But guess what, "she did the same thing" back in her day. At some point, having fun, enjoying life and doing what makes "us" happy has to give way to reality and wisdom! I hope and pray that you will decide to evaluate what you're worth and how this relationship "deep down inside" brings you more pain than joy. You are so deserving and worthy of having a beautiful and trustworthy relationship all your own. I've learned in the past from all of my affairs that I never communicated well. Because of my abandonment issues, I kinda went along with whatever... depending on who I was dating at the time. It was not until my divorce that I realized that I was giving ALL the time and no one was truly pouring into me. I decided to be still and see how I was contributing to that way of living and what was it that I really desired? Being single right now, in this season of life is the absolute best life I've ever experienced. I would not be here right now had I not decided to stop dating and look at the woman I truly desired to be...healthy, whole, worthy and able to say NO because it was the right thing to do. It's hard to say (no) to one's self and others but it gets easier over time. I hope you can say no to the pain and began exploring the woman you were meant to be. Start an ADVENTURE today on self-discovery! You are a TREASURE to behold! I hope you break up with being "lonely and depressed" and embrace COURAGEOUS and FEARLESS!

I was there Only thing is my husband helped his ailing cousin with his ranch He could no longer walk. His wife puts him in a home, Mind you this is my husband cousin. She then provoked my husband While he was down. Meaning high on meth. She's had three husband s. We've been married for 37 years. He would tell me She's walking around with a see threw top. Call him for everything. Broken pipe. Trees are being picked. He needs to come talk to workers. N so on. She is one that I would like to punch her in the face. She has him now. We are having our first grandchild. N he will not be apart of. She now is tired of him. N I don't wAnt him back.

lnlywifelost, being separated from someone that has been a huge part of your life is always hard. It's hard for anyone. Everyone grieves a relationship different. He's trying to bury his pain a different way.

First, I give you kudos for being responsible - taking care of house, kids, pets. That's great honestly and you should feel proud. You will when you look back in time.

Second, who cares what he is doing. You need to get him out of your head and focus on you. There is nothing wrong with you wanting to have fun. You have to decide the person you are there. Be happy with you. Focus on your happiness and who cares what he is doing.

As for women..or men attracted to someone married or separated. Separated is slightly different but it comes down to they feel there aren't strings. They don't have to make a commitment or anything. It's pretty shallow and will make that person unhappier in the long run.

You don't want that. You want a good healthy relationships. It will get better in time. Focus on you.

You're on my heart today! Be encouraged that you have the freedom to choose a different life. Hoping that you can seek counseling to see what can be done differently and how to make a healthy start forward.