what? It was good..lmao

In our twenty years together he had sex alot more than I did....ummm yeah. Nice.

Steven, Soon, Bernie - all the guys.... you are absolutely correct - begin tired is a flimsy excuse when time is made for other less important things - and yes, it's downright hurtful. It's rejection in a very passive aggressive way and I'm sorry to hear so many men have had to endure that.

Along JacJac's point - I was also once in a long term relationship where our libidos were completely mismatched. Sex didn't happen unless I initiated and that situation makes a woman feel the same way it makes a man feel that always has to initiate. Resentful, not desired, not sexy, etc. It made me question MYSELF - I blamed myself for not being enough or sexy enough or whatever. It really does a number on your self esteem. I also wondered if said person *HAD* a sex drive or had some sexual issue. Then I discovered that he had been looking at porn pretty regularly on the internet. My God how that hurt. He obviously had a sex drive, he just wasn't having sex with me. It's a hard pill to swallow (as many of us know) to discover your partner prefers pictures to the real thing - someone that loves them - flesh and blood - in front of their face. The passive aggresive rejection of that is equal to a woman always being "tired". So men, we DO understand.

I agree with whomever said that problems in the bedroom are indicative of larger problems elsewhere that aren't being addressed.

I'm glad now, though, that I've had these experiences AND I've reached a point in my own life that I'm more comfortable in my own skin and with my sexuality. I know what I need in that department and what my libido is and I make no excuses for it. I know that going forward into any other relationship, being on the same page sexually is very important to me and a deal breaker.

Sex what is this sex you speak of. A rare thing in my so called marriage. Twice a week wow what were you some kind of sex machines, only kidding but twice a week was unheard of. Closer to the end she was only interested if she was drunk and that did nothing for me. I used to dream about twice a week, twice a year was actually closer to it and one time went a whole year with out getting any and she slept next to me every night. Ah well thats what happens when you marry some one with intimacy issues, but the funny thing is that did not kick in until after we were married.

In the year before we were married it was often. The year we were married it still was, maybe 3-4 times a week. Maybe 3 or 4 times in the year of 2002. Never again in 2003-2006. I spent 4 years living in the spare bedroom, until I finally left in Dec. 2006. 7 years of nothing, since 2002. I wish I could remember what even a hug feels like.

It was hard to communicate with the person I should have been able to say anything to. He actually sad if I needed anything sexually other than what he was giving me I would have to go somewhere else for it. We had sex twice a month at 5 minutes a pop. No, that was enough for me. On top of it all he couldn't pass the orals. Wow when you love someone you will makes some pretty bonehead decisions. Never ever in a million years would I even date a person who as not skilled in the orals or could only satisfy me because I loved him.

After we separated I met someone who gave me he best sex of my life .only he would never in a million years love me...actually i don't think he liked me but having grea sex without love just isn't worth it right now. Maybe later.

24-28 days/month for 24 years, except for 4 10 wk stretches due to preg or issues. that wasn't the problem, that was all we did Together towards the end.

and now it's 977 days since...

We were once a day or more, before we were married. Then we moved to four or more times a week after, after we got married. Then not at all.

I know I want it once a day, when I am in a relationship... at least. I may be an addict... hhhmmm.

We were once a day or more, before we were married. Then we moved to four or more times a week after, after we got married. Then not at all.

I know I want it once a day, when I am in a relationship... at least. I may be an addict... hhhmmm.

In the first few years, quite a bit; probably once or twice a week. But as the years progressed, it became less frequent. We never had sex at night EVER (his choice, not mine). He would complain that I didn't initiate it, but when I tried he would push me away (literally and figuratively). After one affair and years of verbal abuse, I just gave up. Toss in a hysterectomy and early menopause, and you're talking frustration. But he knew how to hurt me the most; he had the second affair.

He never cared about me or my needs; it was always all about him. Makes me sad.

why weren't all these women who want sex frequently interested in me before I was married? That's what I want to know...

Enough to not miss it yet enough to not crave it either. The handcuffs and spatula did improve things though.

Apparently not enough...

Babe, I've never had enough sex and I've heard I'm on my way to my sexual peak. So, anyone who steps to me has to step correctly. I hate sebaticals (sp?). This one is serving it's purpose though.