Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
What kinds of reactions do you have to people who try and control you?
Do you have the same feelings when you are your own tyrant?
My inner tyrant is always trying to tell me it's because she cares and for my own good.
How come when other people are sounding like a tyrant they don't sound like they care or have our best interests at heart?
Do you have the same feelings when you are your own tyrant?
My inner tyrant is always trying to tell me it's because she cares and for my own good.
How come when other people are sounding like a tyrant they don't sound like they care or have our best interests at heart?
and What Jakey just said. No one can control you if you don't allow it.
They think that if you give them control in one arena, they assume that you don't want it back, and that they now can have it in all aspects without being respectful, or return it.
so I think to say no one controls you is a misnomer, it's too broad a statement.
It's why we don't drive through stop signs when we're in a hurry. In my understanding, that's super ego, not conscience. Your definition may differ.
But really I'm talking more about how we're so much more tolerant of our inner tyrant, the one who chastises and demands. For me at least, that's not conscience either. It's a demanding parent, or inner censor, or critic.
We don't tolerate that kind of behaviour from tyrants outside of ourselves very well, even if they are our boss, the traffic cop, the IRS agent, our doctor, or spouse. How many of those have our best interests at heart, even if we're too annoyed or defensive to listen to them?
Traffic Cop - You break the law, you suffer the consequences.
IRS Agent - You don't follow the tax laws, you pay penalty.
Doctor - They have practices, and you have a choice.
Spouse - Only if you let them.
The only one you "should" be able to trust in having your best interest at heart, is your spouse. The others, have agendas.
I am confused.
Then I can see precisely why you were controlled by #45's T-Shirt.
Carry on.