Bipolar Disorder Support Group

Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.

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BB8484 02/19/2018

I am having a hard time. I try to explain my mental illness to my boyfriend he doesnt get it. Im not suicidal right now but I just feel like theres no point. I wish I would just die. I have been sober for over 18 months and thats definitely helped but hasnt fixed it. I take Lamictal and Prozac. And still feel this way. I get manic (very breifly) and then I crash down into depression and cant get back up. I feel crazy. My boyfriend tells me its my mindset or maybe I shouldnt be taking these meds. HE DOESNT GET IT. No one does. I feel alone. Im in a 12 step program and am told the answer is in the steps. Its not Ive worked them and still get to feeling low. I dont know what to do. I cant keep a job. I cant pay my bills. I can barely take care of myself. I just want to grow up. I keep moving out of my parents house and moving back home like a failure because I just cant do it. Any advice or experience would be helpful. I honestly feel alone. I feel like an alien when I try to explain what Im going through to my boyfriend. And my one good friend who did understand took his life in September. I have no one left to talk to I feel like. I just want to get under my covers and never get back out.

MoobbusT 02/19/2018

Hey there. Smarter people than me will no doubt have some more helpful opinion... but the best move you can do that I am aware of is become part of a support group, either irl or this one for example --so you are on the right track. Wishing you the best. tc

Moob

acuriousfish 02/20/2018

I'd get my meds sorted - they obviously aren't working as they should - you've got two meds there that can cause mania, particularly the prozac. Challenge your doctor to find a combo that works for you.

Then trade in your boyfriend for one with a bit of intelligence.

arfie 02/20/2018

40 years of trying to explain my mental illness to the love of my life has convinced me of how little I understand it myself. Accepting that ignorance as a simple fact has added a profound depth to the bond between us. We get to figure it out together. Not an easy sort, but as our 38th anniversary we sometimes wonder if we are in danger of getting good at it. Might need another 38 years of practice, but we're up for it, Life willing.

The fact that I was already in therapy when we met made me "The Identified Patient" from day one. In the past 2 or 3 decades, hubs has started admitting that he has mental illnesses of his own which have nothing to do with me. What goes around comes around.

Don't know if that relates to what you are going through, but. . . Gentle support while you sort your own.

beckyp 02/20/2018

I sobered up in AA and haven't had a drink 39 years. Working the steps helps us get and stay sober, it doesn't cure bipolar. It took me several years to find the right med cocktail for me, but with working with my pdoc(psychiatrist) we found the right combo. You have a brain chemistry illness and that causes the highs and lows, it has nothing to do with growing up. Work with your Dr. and maybe get into therapy with a tdoc who works with bipolar patients. Read up on bipolar and educate yourself. It will help. These things helped me. You are not crazy.

SunCloudJD 02/20/2018

Welcome BB...... This is a good place to come for support..... I'm glad that you're here but sorry for what's brought you here

I agree with Fish.... I don't think your meds are working as they should..... Both of those meds can make you high and when there's a high there's a crash

I also agree that I'd talk to your doctor about the Prozac..... Many people with bipolar disorder can't take anti depressants for the reason you're describing

Your boyfriend isn't going to 'get' being bipolar as it's not within his experience....

I would tell him to look up signs and symptoms of bipolar disorder online.... There is a ton of info on it

I would ask him for empathy but maybe don't make him your 'go to' person to discuss it as he really won't understand what it's like..... Places like DS are a good places to come for like minded people..... and very supportive people

Big squishy hug.....xo

BB8484 02/20/2018

Thank you all so much. It really helps to know I am not alone. Met with my doctor today. He added two medications along with those hope it works. Im just trying to keep the faith. Sending love to all of you I am so grateful I joined this group i am going to search and see if I can find n in person bipolar support group as well.

OlderCPer 02/21/2018

Yeah if possible, and it will be tough but try to keep your alcohol issues separate from the BiPolar ones. The BiPolar ones don't belong in an AA meeting and can't be fixed there. I realize people mean well in those meetings, but it's a whole different ball game.

Are you in Therapy for the BiPolar, because that would probably be a big help for dealing with those issues. You have a complicated case, as your trying to stabilize 2 really heavy issues at one time. That takes a lot of courage and determination and a healthy dose of hootzpah! So, don't by any means be down on yourself, your kicking ass.

It may just be easier it you work on your BiPolar with a Therapist and the Alcohol issues with AA. And your Therapist can help you separate them and learn coping skills to apply to daily living.

Take care,
kat

Sunshinegirl0228 02/21/2018

That’s all the sepresssion talking. As for the boyfriend, he may never understand what you are going through. I just want to hug you and say I know just how you feel and it sucks. I hope you will get through this period of your life. I’m still working through depression myself and it sucks

BB8484 02/21/2018

I have made it another day and honestly that is a blessing. Trying to stay positive its been so up and down lately im really grateful to have this place to come and talk. Also I start a new job tomorrow. Im realizing its okay to keep failing as long as i keep trying. Sending love to all of you this evening.

oldredheart 02/21/2018

I just recently changed psychiatrists. The old one just would not work with me on changing meds. I knew I was not on the right ones. I am so lucky to have finally found a good doctor. After a few weeks on my new meds, I feel great. I think one has to gain a great knowledge of what the disease can do. When all is understood on how it affects you, it is much easier to cope with. I'm 65 now and I have been struggling with my bipolar depression since I was 17.

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