In my strictly personal herstory of deep psychotic isolation, I have wondered often if there is a connection between "boredom" and hysterical fears, aka phobias. When my isolation is stable enough to allow for boredom, the phobias which sent me into isolation in the first place always seem to get the upper hand, driving me into panic attacks, paranoia, etc.

Dunno. . . The big for sure is that my psychotic isolation has always been and solidly remains a tough hurdle to jump. Old habits die hard.

I also dunno if that has anything to do with your current dilemma or not. It's just what farted out my fingertips.

Continued support while you sort your own, Frog. I hope the venting helped.

I was wondering if you have been doing journaling every day? I think that would help you.

I see that at the beginning of the day you are often thinking the worst, "catastrophizing" is what they call it sometimes. If you could write out at the beginning of the day, allll the things that are worrying you and making you anxious.

Then at the end of the day, before you go to bed, to go back to that same journal, and write out what the outcome was for each item... was it as bad as you thought, was it better, or worse, how did you handle it, how did you feel about accomplishing it, etc.

This is a form of therapy where you challenge your anticipatory thoughts and (usually!) see that they turned out being not as bad as you thought they would be.

This will give you confidence in facing these types of days, and fears, again.

Also, try to list 3 things each day that you are grateful for. This will help you to look more at the positives in your life than the negatives.

I think I know a little of what you mean. Those thoughts....those persisting thoughts. I fear things I, logically, know would NEVER happen. I used to constantly think I would be incarcerated. I am a good, decent law abiding citizen, I'm not going to jail, but, with too much thinking time, I could sure convince myself there's a chance I could. That's not something I think about much anymore, but, it's an example of how my mind can work. I have begun practicing setting myself up for positive experiences. As I manage anxiety, I have learned I will go right to setting myself up for the worst case scenario. You know, the one that NEVER happens or isn't even that bad if it does. For example, I have been struggling with finances for awhile and I often think I will not have money. This leads to me down a wretched trail of how I go hungry, and my beloved cat will go hungry and I'll be evicted and the lights will be turned off. Turns out, I HAVE actually ran out of money and I mean, ran out of money, like, less than 24 hours after being paid with two more weeks to wait on more income. It's awful but things work out. I know it's hard to trust that things will work out for people who manage anxiety like us, but, they do, in fact, work out. We have options. We can think the worst or do our best to make things happen in a positive way and, should they not work out all the way in a positive way, be glad and grateful for what has worked out and use what didn't to plan for next time. I'm definitely not trying to be self righteous right now. I am just pleased that I have found a couple of things that have helped me and I wanted to share because they may help someone else. I still have BAD days and nights. In fact, I'm here tonight because I woke up with significant anxiety after three hours of sleep and, now, trying to go back to sleep brings anxiety because I worry about and fear that feeling/sensation of anxiety will wake me again. I'm full of anxiousness right now and rambling. I hope you will forgive that. My initial intent was to just let you know I can relate on some level to what you are saying. We are not alone and people care. We have support through this forum and that is a good thing. I wish for you all the best!

Start "doing" something with your thoughts instead just sitting.

Focus on daily living activities and write. The more you write, you're "doing" something with those thoughts.

Thank you to all of you guys. I don't have the energy to write out individual comments (had another rough sleepless night) but I am greatful that you all care enough to write words of support for me.

I do write things in a journal when I remember to I use the one on here and on my phone. It doesn't do much help to me though. It occasionally feels nice to vent it out but other than that it hasn't worked for me like others say it worked for them.

And I do try my best to challenge some of my anxieties and push through them. Actually every day I have to with going outside and being around the wasps. Sometimes the challenging of anxieties can help but sometimes it does nothing and a different approach is needed.

Thank you all for the helpful words though you guys are awesome I hope you're all doing good today.

Hi...I feel your pain. This anxiety thing sux and there is nothing logical about it. Logical thoughts do not drive it away, at least not for me.

I find things that are diversions and distractions but they are not cures.

I always recommend The Anxiety Guy to fellow anxiety sufferers. If you just google that, you will get tons of info. His youtube videos and podcasts are great and he has hundreds of them. He is the real deal having suffered from anxiety. He's also very active on all social media and has weekly live FB sessions.

Hope things get better for you!