I had a pretty bad scare the other day when my boyfriend made love to me but finished inside me. I was frozen in fear and confusion. I had to hold back tears and raising my voice as I asked him why he did it. He just started vacantly at me and said he thought I was on birth control.
I haven't been on birth control for the past year due to me switching meds for my depression twice and I didnt want my hormones to be anymore chaotic.
After I sat stone still and cried a little we both got up and got the Plan B pill. The next day I got a second period and at first I was relieved.....and then I broke down and felt sick while I cried. My biological clock wants a child but I am not ready for one.
All day long I keep thinking about if I had let it grow. My mind is so torn and I feel like an irresponsible monster.
I feel like all I do is work (I'm juggling an unpaid internship and an evening restaurant kitchen job to keep the bills paid), I don't have any friends who I can talk to (I moved to my current state a few years ago and never succeeded in making non-romantic acquaintances, and my old friends have moved on), my boyfriend has compassion fatigue to the point of anger, and every avenue I've tried to...
I arrived at college like 5 weeks ago or so. But I still have 0 friends and whenever I go to the cafeteria and my hiding place is taken I can only think about how much they’re all judging me, whether they are or not. My brain just tells me I’m a jerk, I’m fat for eating so much (even today when it was likely my only meal for the day... so that seems silly but other people don’t know...