Hello shaunac,

Several years ago I was in a similar place to where you are now. I did not consider myself to be an alcoholic at the time but that was only because of failure to see the reality of where I was. Drinking went from twice a week to every day and finally more or less all day, every day. It got so bad that I knew I had to quit but yet I wanted to keep drinking. When I finally tried to stop, I found it impossible to stay sober for more than a few days. I also wrongly believed that I could not function or survive without alcohol. I had lost all hope for the future.

Today, life could not be any more different. I have not taken a drink for many years and have not even been tempted to drink for a long time. The reason I am telling you this is to show that no matter how bad things may be, you can turn it around completely. In my case, I had to do something that I swore I would never do and go to a meeting of Alcoholics Anonymous. Maybe AA would help you too.

If you don't want to quit, and don't see sobriety here -- why post? I am guessing you'd actually *like* to get sober -- but probably like most of us, don't think that's possible so are resolved to a life of feeling sick and tired.
Get some help. AA, therapy, smart recovery -- anything but the same old same old which clearly is NOT working.

Because there is such a thing as harm reduction. I feel like your post was unnecessarily judgmental.

Nothing ever changes if nothing never changes!

I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers!

God Bless

im so sorry for you. If you're still in the binge this harm reduction sounds like it's not working. Is harm reduction smoking pot?
1-2

I don't believe in God. I mean quite simply drinking less. I haven't had anything since Tuesday. This page is full of judgment or religious types.

Hello shaunac,

The judgement of other people, real or imagined, is not nearly as important as what you think of yourself. However, when you post on a forum like this you can expect others to relate what has worked for them in the hope that their experience would help you too.

I would urge you to learn more about alcoholism as it is a serious condition that actually kills many people at a young age. If you are an alcoholic, you have two simple options to choose from and there is no ‘in between’ or grey area. Your first option is to continue as you are doing now in trying to control your drinking. This approach almost always ends in failure for an alcoholic and there are well defined reasons for that failure. Put simply, an alcoholic cannot control his or her drinking for a prolonged period of time. Alcoholism is also a progressive condition so the amount that you drink will increase and the sober periods will become shorter. The other option is to quit drinking.

You don’t see a sober life in your future but your thinking is distorted by drinking. Until you have really tried it, how can you know what a sober life is like? I understand where you are at as I have been there. If people had advised me about alcoholism at that time, I would have told them to get lost and mind their own business. It took a lot more drinking and the ensuing mayhem before I accepted the reality that I could not drink. I hope your journey is an easier one.

Actually you are incorrect. You assume I don't know anything about alcoholism. I have a Masters degree in Social Work and there is a thing called harm reduction that works for some people.

No. this is not a place for judgment and I'm not stupid enough to not know the difference between supportive comments and holier than thou, sometimes literally, comments. You presume that I'm ignorant of your facts above.

I would place money on you being a guy. Look up mansplaining on the internet or urban dictionary. You're incredibly condescending.

If you know all the answers and harm reduction "works for some people", why are you here?

Masters degrees, doctorates, millions of dollars.

None of those things, and all of the knowledge in the world won't help you if you don't want to help yourself.

You certainly don't need God to stop drinking. There are successful people that quit with sheer willpower. There are others who have used Smart Recovery or AA. There are some that used meditation to eliminate their desire.

Chances are, you very well understand that in many heavy drinkers, there's no way back to normalcy.

If harm reduction is your choice for a solution, good luck.

Congratulations on having it all worked out.

Big change from your original post where you stated “I'm an alcoholic. And I don't even want to quit. It's affected every part of my life. I spend most days hungover and very depressed. I am living off savings that will be gone soon. I binge drink wine about twice a week. I don't see a sober life in my future.”

I am just an uneducated alcoholic and I have no wish to argue with a smart dude like yourself.

I was smart too, in fact most alcoholics are well above average intelligence. The fact that I was smart and had things all figured out was a large reason that alcohol and getting plastered on a fermented liquid was so appealing! I was so self reliant that when I realized that I wasn't in control I was terrified. That was one of the big lures of alcohol. The ease and comfort. That Aaahhhh moment is like Big H to an addict. I was also not smart enough to realize that Big Al is a drug. A very addictive drug. Oh and I would get that Aaaahhhh moment when I knew the booze was coming. It's a drug and I had to have my fix. Actually smart is a big roadblock to many of the alcoholics I have known. The smartest ones always know there is nothing out there and that's a scary reason they climb in a bottle.

It's powerful and it had me bowing before it and I didn't ever think anything could have me whipped but Al did. But I never tried Harm Reduction. Is that like just taking a little bit of the drug?

1-2

I could ask all of you the same question. If you have all of the answers then why are you here? To be heard, to get positive support, and to write out your thoughts. Some of you are so reductionist in your thinking. Yes, you'll have to look that up. By the way, I haven't had a drink since Tuesday and did 3 hours of yoga today, so screw your judgment and go watch tv.

none of us here have judged you at all....you are being very defensive and rude....all the others have done is try to help you....and you come across as rather arrogant...if you truly have a problem with the bottle it would humble you....it's called 'rock bottom'....I don't see you binge drinking a couple of bottles of wine a week as severe a problem as a lot of us here have without drinking to oblivion every night....I see you saying you are so intelligent and using your intelligence here to berate and belittle the rest of us....if you're that bloody great then why isn't your life working as it should?....just my 2 pennies worth...but I won't sit here and let you be nasty to others here who have been nice to you...you're out of order!!!!

Since you ask, I'll tell you why I'm here.

It's because I haven't had a drink since Saturday.

Because I tried "harm reduction" and it worked for a while. Until it didn't.

Because I was suicidal.

Because I would binge drink once or twice a week. Until I was drinking until I passed out several times a week.

Because I drank myself out of jobs and into financial difficulties.

BTW , that last drink was on Saturday, July 3, 2004. I'm here to share what worked for me and has kept me sober for the last 12 or so years with those who are interested in achieving a sober life.

But then again, I'm a reductionist, what do I know? "Keep it simple, stupid" works for me.