I personally still wear my rings on my left hand. I don't know that there is a rule that we must switch to right hand.. My husband's wedding band is here also and i have considerd wearing it on a nice gold chain. I won't change the integrity or the looks of the ring as it belongs to our son when I go to Heaven. Hopes this helps!

Thank you all so much for your ideas/comments. All of you who have responded have given me comfort in at least one area of this whole confusing mess. In my past life (pre-Darrell's death), such a subject would have been only a molehill and I would have made an instant decision and been done with it. Now, of course...

Thank you, again, for reducing the mountain a bit.

Hugs,

Terry

You do whatever you want! Totally up to you - ..Absolutely no rules at all!

I would not rush into any permanent altering/melting/redesigning, too quickly.....Once a jeweler changes it......can't change it back ...

I still wear mine...and I had my husband's resized to also wear.

I removed my wedding ring att aaround a year. I just didn't feel right wearing it anymore. In it's place I now wear a ring he bought me. There are no rules and there is nothing to say you must remove your ring. I did but it's what ii felt comfortable with. I have both my husband's and mine nestled together in his jewelery box. I take a peek at them every so often. To make them into one ring is quite expensive so I think for now i will keep them there. Hugs, Chris

For me I took my wedding ring off at one year, it was part of a ritual of moving forward. Years ago I had bought her a pendant of a zuni bear (her nickname was lil' bear) and it was one of her favorite things, so I now where that on a chain, the weight of the pendant on my chest feels good.

This is a very personal decision and everyone will be different.

As for our wedding rings, my oldest son asked if I could keep them for him when he gets married. He said being together for 40 years is an inspiration and he would hope the rings held the same magic for him (I did explain it was hard work and not magic that makes a relationship last, lols).

Hugs,

-Pete-

Well, I've been up and I've been down in my decision making about our rings. I wore my rings and my husband's ring on my left hand for 2 years (last Dec.). Then as I thought about possibly dating, I removed them and put a "widow"'s ring on my left hand. I wore that for almost 6 months but decided I really WANTED to wear my wedding rings. I put them back on and they feel just right to me. Who knows how I'll feel next year?

There is no right or wrong answer to this - even the etiquette gurus say it is entirely up to you and nobody else - it's whatever you are comfortable with.

When Cliff died, I was wearing a whole stack of rings: my engagement ring, my wedding ring, another wedding ring from when we renewed our vows, and TWO anniversary rings. I had worn his rings for so many years that my finger is permanently dented - I was smaller when I was in my 20's and those rings went on the first time. I knew for me that I would have to change what I wore, but I was reluctant, too.

Finally, I had a "family ring" made to match my anniversary rings (eternity rings). It is the same style but 3 of the stones have been swapped for the birthstones of Cliff and our 2 boys - mine is diamond so those remained. Cliff's birthstone is in the middle and the boys on either side. When I picked it up from the jeweler's, I had a close friend go with me, which was a good thing. I removed all my rings and moved them to my right hand and put the family ring on my left hand in their place. I cried like a baby, but my girlfriend and the jeweler knew and understood.

That was a first and major step in my healing. Cliff will always be part of the family and the ring symbolizes that.

His main wedding ring he was buried in - we couldn't get it off - but the second one from when we renewed our vows I have, and my hands were so much smaller than his big brawny ones that my ring fits inside of his. I wear them as a pendant that way - it looks like one of those circle pendants, so it's not too obvious. In fact, it actually looks pretty stylish.

I still wear the pendant from time to time, and I wear the family ring on my right hand now.

I hope this helps. Again, it is entirely up to you - you don't have to remove them or move them unless you feel more comfortable doing so. For me, I had to do everything in stages.

Love and Hugs,
Martha

My husband passed a year and a half ago and I'm still wearing my rings and probably always will--his ring is in a box put away--but I have considered putting it on the chain with the "wedding day silouette" pendant my kids bought me at Christmas so I can wear it around my neck when it feels right to do so.

I will wear my ring forever at least I feel that way now. I wear his on my right middle finger and it gives me comfort to look down and see it there. Take your time you will know when it's right for you to take them off if you feel better in doing so or keep them on it's up to you

My Charlie has been gone for 12 weeks. I continue to wear my rings on my left hand.

When Charle was in the ICU on a ventilator he was really retaining fluid. The nurse said we should take off his reing before we couldn't get it off. I put it in my purse. Even though he couldn't talk, Charlie kept letting me know he was worried about his ring. After he was on dialysis (and a few days before he died) the swelling went down some and I put it back on him. After I had to let him go, I couldn't bear to take it away from him again so I buried it with him.

I have given my family instructions to bury my rings with me. Charlie and I are married for all eternity.

Julie

I lost Joe ninth months ago now and will forever wear my wedding band. I only had it on my hand for ten day short of our first anniversary. He actually bought a diamond band for both of my hands and I will keep them on my fingers forever. His ring i had on a chain around my neck but I was so afraid of losign it that I put it in a special box.
I never heard of a widows ring? what is that? i am not sure I want to wear black stones, but who knows..in time I may change my mind.
My mom lost my dad 12 year ago and has never removed her band. She said when she married it was forever and that means eternity and beyond to her.
I think we all have to follow our hearts and feelings and nothing is wrong or right.

I am sorry for your loss.

I lost my husband 15 months ago. I wear my wedding ring, where he placed it. His wedding riing fits perfectly, on the middle finger of my right hand, fits beautfully.
I have no interest in dating, right now, and the rings are just a natural part of me.

I don't wear jewelry, except for earrings, my watch, and these 2 rings.
Simply, my own personal choice.

No rush, in time you feel what is right for you:)

(HUGS)
Debi

I took my ring off and it has been almost 9 months. I wore his ring on a chain around my neck but his ring was so big it kept hurting my chest. I decided to get a kids birthstone pendant for my daughter and one for my husband. I wear both on my necklance next to my cross. That way my husband and daughter are always next to my heart forever. This is a very personal decision. In time, you will know what is right for you, everyone differs.

Dear Terry,

My husband died on the last day of our honeymoon in Hawaii almost 32 months ago on Thanksgiving Day and I'm still wearing my engagement ring and wedding band. I am proud to wear the rings and whenever someone asks how long do I plan to wear them, I reply that I will wear them as long as I want to. Wear your ring as long as you want and don't let anyone tell you that you should take it off. As for his wedding band, I bought a chain and wear his band on that chain around my neck.