This thought has crossed my mind, and I think my husband would have handled some things better when it comes to the kids, but I think he would have been equally devastated.

My husband and I have 2 boys, and they are truly a handful. It's amazing how they listened to him in such a way that they knew when he meant business. They listen to me too, but their is something about raising boys, and how the role of the father means so much.

I think he would have done the best that he could have with the grief that he would have faced.

Khanya

I hear you Khanya - there are some things that guys just need a guy for. I could handle most things, or pay someone to handle them for me, but the thing that threw me were the "man to man" talks. I had hoped their uncle (my brother) would have bcome more involved in my sons' lives so that they would have a man to ask these questions of, but he didn't. It was left to me to try and finish the "male education" stuff. I have heard from widowers trying to raise daughters that they have the same problem with "female" subjects. I am not a prude, and I havealways been honest with my boys, but I don't think anything fully prepares you for stepping into their parental shoes for some things. At least that was my experience.

Love and Hugs....

I some good friends who told me the day after Mike passed that if God had to take one of us it had to be him because he would not have made it. My youngest son also told me that his dad would've fallen apart and they would be homeless under the bridge. I was my husbands whole world. My kids tell me that all the time. I think he would've nurtured our children and took care of their grief better than I have. Like many of you have already stated, I would not want him to go through this, this early in life.

Mike would have drank himself stupid. His mother would be telling him how to raise my kids. He would have to hire an accountant to take my place in the business, if he would have had brains enough not to let that go bankrupt.

Maggie

Oh, Maggie, Maggie....truth is, I think Joe would have handled it the way I've handled it. I don't know though, maybe he would have sold the business and gone back on the road. Thinking about it makes me teary, isn't that odd?

I thought about this too.

During my husband's cancer years, I believe I was the better caretaker of us two. My husband wasn't a good care-giver. I was always the one who took care of family when in need.

However, IF it was me who passed on first, I believe he would of handled the being alone much better than I am.

He had much more going on in his life than I did/do. He had interests, which didn't involve me (sports) that he would carry on. Financially, he was the source of income, therefore less stress about bill paying. The grieving and missing me, well there would have been some, but not as I am experiencing it.