I don't have any advice for you but I understand. My son is 2 and his dad is womanizer who likes to mooch off his women. I don't want my son to turn out like that. My only plan is to start dating and make sure I find a real man to counteract that horrible influence.

I feel your pain, that is why I stayed with my ex was because of our kids. But then you need to think, is that really a relationship? Someone that abuses you and doesn't love you? Is selfish enough to not worry about anyone but himself (and his cock)?

How long has your ex been with the new GF? I think that would take a toll on me as well because I don't want my kids to be around any of the women that their dad has been with (but he can't keep relationships) so then I don't want the women/flings in and out of their lives, and them thinking it is ok.

So you not wanting them to be around his new GF is fine. But you need to set a limit, like they have to be together for a year or even be married until you will allow that. At least that i what I would do.

Go out, date yourself, be happy. Don't let that jerk ex of yours control your life any more. It isn't fair how easily these things move on, but at least you are strong enough to know what is right and wrong, especially for your children. Good luck and hugs. It should get easier to cope with in due time.

Thats a great idea that theyd have to be together long so I know its serious.. Theyve only been together a couple months (part of which he was with me as well) & she claims shes pregnant.. Hes had other affairs too.. Glad I didnt let my kids around them since they didnt last long..

My kids are 3, 7 and 8 and I just left their dad 2mos ago and its harder on the older two...my 3 yr old is fine with it and wont really ever remeber us together.

I worry most about my oldest as he is really the one struggling and even having breakdowns. I am going to start the older two in counseling to help them deal with their feelings.

I stayed for the same reason but it would of been better if I left when they are younger. Now their dad is not dating and we seem to both focus on the kids.

It is a hard thing to deal with, my wife left me for another man when our kids were 3 and 5, she introduced him to the kids within 2 weeks of moving out of our home, she introduced him to her parents earlier than that, it was harsh, I had all the feelings of being afraid this guy was a bad person, worried he would hurt my children, worried she was trying to replace me in thier lives, and hers, I felt like she was trying to throw me away like trash with no regard to the kids feelings at all, it was hard to deal with.

However, all that said, kids meet different people all the time, new people at school, new friends of yours, other kids parents, there is really not much difference, people come in and out of their lives, you can't control every minute of every day with what they are exposed to, you just have to hope for the best when they are away from you.

I have the same doubts about the people my X takes my kids around now, but I fought hard to limit it, I have primary custody so she gets them EOW only, I am doing everything I can to be a major part in thier lives. She has addiction issues and the friends to show it, I can only hope for the best when she has them.

When people get divorced with kids it is a losing situation, you lose time with the kids, you lose part of that bond, in most cases the X will get visitation and they will go on with thier lives, without you, the same as you will without them. You not wanting the kids to ever see their dad with somoene else sounds selfish on your part to me, they need their dad in their lives, divorce is a part of that life, they love everyone involved, you and dad don't see eye to eye anymore, but they don't have that problem, they see the both of you as mom and dad just like always. The suggestion of making him wait a year to introduce them to a woman, I doubt you could get that court ordered, that is trying to control him after a divorce, if he has visitation he has ther right to do whatever he wants during that time, whether you approve of it or not. It took me a while to realize that with my X, but I feel better not worrying about her, she is out of my life, I just make the best of my time with the kids when I have them, and live my life like I see fit.