Sexual Abuse Support Group
Sexual abuse is a relative cultural term used to describe sexual relations and behavior between two or more parties which are considered criminally and/or morally offensive. Different types of sexual abuse involve: Non-consensual, forced physical sexual behavior such as rape, incest or sexual assault, or psychological forms of abuse, such as verbal sexual behavior or...
Hi. I'm feeling very alone. We found out at the end of this past school year that our son was being sexually abused by another classmate, both being 7 years old. The other child threatened our son with that he had to keep it a secret or he'd take his things and wouldn't be his friend anymore. My son was scared. It had gone on for a couple of months. Yes, authorities had been contacted, nothing came of any of it. My main concern, he's in therapy currently, but will I know if it is actually helping? How do I help him? What do I say, not say? How do I stop feeling so alone dealing with this? We haven't talked about it too much since therapy started, I think he gets embarrassed now and I don't want him to be embarrassed. It wasn't his fault. But it's hard to tell him that when the other child was not disciplined at all for doing this. And I realize, at that age, the other child has had to be exposed to this kind of thing, which breaks my heart as well, but, I need to focus on my son and what to do to help him best get through this so that maybe he can shut the door on this. Is that even possible?
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Middy is off for a bit so if anyone needs a CL please just give me a shoutSending a big hug...xo
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I was sexually assaulted as a kid. I find it hard to accept that another person's actions caused me so much harm. He made bad choices and now I am paying the price. Stupid PTSD!
http://www.dailystrength.org/groups/parents-whose-children-have-been-sexually-abused/discussions
There are parents there who have very similar circumstances as yours, and it's a group that is very supportive. There's also a topic further down on the list of topics that has all kinds of resources-- websites, books for kids, books for adults, etc. Another website that is very comprehensive and educational is www.mosac.net (Mothers of Sexually Abused Children). It has taught me so much about this issue, and I think you'll find if you explore all the items on the menu on the left that there is info for just about any question you may have.
I hope this is helpful, and I hope to see you over on the parents' group. You are not alone in this, know that you and yours are in my thoughts and prayers...
You are doing in what you are suppose to be doing. You're loving him, but tell him... Bunches, and this isn't his fault..try not to use the word "but" to much like "it's not your fault, but the other boy needs help too.."it minimizes in his mind. Just concentrate on your son, try not to bring the other kid up. If you son does, that's different, you try not to.
Tell your son your proud of him for telling you, and how much you love and care for him... You can't stress this enough.
Also, mom... This next line is for you (I'm sorry I forgot your name)
You are NOT a failure. You did not fail him.
Please do not blame yourself, I know this is hard, it's very hard... But you did not fail! I promise you that!
Now, when you give your son a hug and tell him you love him, look into his eyes, and smile. He knows this is hurting you, might be blaming himself, tell him it's not his fault, hugs, and more kisses!
No I'm not crazy, but this will help both of you through this, and even if you don't do it all at once, just doing it is wonderful!!
(As with all my messages, any questions, comments. please drop me a message anytime!)