"resentments mark the places i see myself as a victim." ~anon

the depression which has accompanied the 5 year mark of the tragic start of my second parenting career has progressed to where i am recogizing the resentments of its necessity. i can easily claim victimhood in the loss of my second son and his wife. well? ? ? the romantic couple was divorce waltzing at the time of the accident. i probably would have lost the DIL anyway and still find it hard to miss a woman who called me, "monster-in-law." but losing my youngest son still feels like unmitigated victimhood. 

the list of resentments goes on, but i am venting freely elsewhere and don't feel a great need to list them here. the piece i am reaching for here is how to make peace with resentments. how to keep those resentments from eating holes in my soul. i theorate that harboring those resentments is a significant part of my depression.

thoughts? experience? unsolicited advice?

gentle inventory

the makeshit family feels like it is still holding an even keel. the busy summer is drifting into its final weeks. august 13 hails the start of the new school year. my depression has remained in the background enough to allow me to keep on taking care of business. most of it, at least.