It's been a while since I posted so, I'll bring people up to date. Husband has been sick both mentally and physically since September. It's been wearing me down. Work has been busy as usual and I am having problems with my back. Everything came to a head in late December- I could no longer function for even basic needs like bathing and eating. The depression had won. I was picking up knives and thinking of plunging one into my chest. This landed me inpatient in the behavior health unit for a week. After that I was placed in a partial inpatient program for several weeks. The partial program was good- was living at home but spending my days learning a lot of coping skills and getting feedback from others on my issues.

Since I left the hospital the anxiety has been getting worse. Hubby wound up in the hospital right after me and has been fragile since. I am living with constant anxiety of varying levels. Depression is better but the anxiety is becoming taxing. Now the nightmares are back. Been waking up at least 2 times a night from them. Trazodone, Paxil, prazosin and Xanax before bed are not helping. Was even awake enough after 150 mg of Trazodone to drive hubby to emergency room the other night. Was up to 1 AM that night. I have been trying breathing exercises and meditation too but nothing seems to be helping. Just getting frustrated and needed to vent.