Not sure if I have PTSD or not. Was in an emotionally and physically abusive relationship for ten years, now I've been out for five but we co-parent so I still have to maintain contact with my abuser. Sometimes I get scared that something will happen to the kids while in his care. I have nightmares about him. Occasionally I'll look in the mirror and think I can still see bruises around my neck from long ago. Mostly I'm functional, I have a full-time job and school and the kids and when I have something to do, I'm fine. But when I don't keep myself busy, thoughts come crashing back and I get depressed. I start remembering all the things he said about how I'm lazy, a waste of space, a loser, and worse and I wonder if it's true. When I have to deal with him I get anxious and think irrationally about what ways he could screw my life up, so I avoid any unnecessary interaction. He still texts me to tell me he wants me or misses me, then gets mad when I don't return his advances. But I get the same anxious feeling dealing with my dad because he only ever calls to ask me for money, or some favor. I feel like my dad was emotionally abusive though, I know he emotionally abused my mom, I think he physically abused her too. Anyway, I've kind of been on the fence about posting here because I'm not sure that I have PTSD.