happy Birthday, my wish for you is that you try and be thankful that you are healthy. Worry about today and be healthy. and happy. We all come in different sizes, we are all not meant to be the same. The trick that I'm trying for my self is "just for today" I get up and decide that just fro today I'm not eat this or that or I'm gonna walk further and I stick with it and am doing pretty well. On Wednesday I decided no bread and i made it Thursday it was no sugar and i just stayed off the bread to cause I knew if I wanted to I could. Today is my decision to have veggies only. It gives me control over what i want.

I know exactly how you feel Steph. I know I wont fit in booths. On the few occassions I have ate at a restuarant, in the last 5yrs, I had hubby go in first and see if there were tables with chairs. Mostly he just picks up take out and we eat it at home. Its been a long time since Ive ate at a real restuarant., having a waitress come to the table and ask what I want, feel her judging me.
I feel bad cuz hubby likes to eat at buffets but since I put on this last 100lbs, there is no way in hell Im going to a buffet. I can just see the ppl staring at me, watching what I put on my plate, watching how many times I go up to get food.
I guess in a way, this is a good thing, my not wanting to eat at food places, lol, imagine what I would weigh if I felt comfortable eating out all the time!
You are not alone Steph. But I think you still see your body as it was at 350+. Im sorry your birthday didnt go smoothly. You need to remember where you were at this time last year and see how far you have come! Thats the greatest gift ever!

First of all.HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!!!! btw...my birthday is tomorrow :)

I know exactly how you feel. I have these issues as well. Recently at work, i needed a new office chair. I was told to check around the office to see if there was one i could start using. Well...ALL OF THEM WERE TOO NARROW!!!! and to make matters worse, the evil HR lady told me they were going to have a "hard time accommodating" me. How embarrassing and it made me feel very ashamed of myself. I am also getting to the point where my stomach is so big it is almost touching my steering wheel. It is affecting every single area of my life.

My bday is monday:) I kinda dont or have never let my weight totally control things I want to do. Although deep inside it has bothered me. I even swim with my kids. I have been losing so now am a quite a bit smaller than I was but still hate the size I am. I wish you would go and eat with your parents and enjoy your birthday . I agree that we all need to love ourself no matter what size we are and I work on this daily! Its not easy for me. I hope no matter what you decide that you have a wonderful birthday.

Im sorry you are going thru this also TC. I know what you mean about office chairs. Thats sucks so bad that the evil HR lady was a bitch. They are supposed to be the understanding, accomodating ones at work. Thats just wrong.

I understand exactly how you feel. I can't fit into most booths and I am always afraid of breaking a chair, even when I visit someone's home. I am proud of you for telling your parents what you needed to do, it is so hard to do that sometimes. My niece is getting married in July and I am so stressed out about having to go to her wedding! The outfit, the chairs, people I haven't seen since I put the weight on, etc...I know it sounds selfish but I doubt I will enjoy what is supposed to be a fun event.

I can totally understand how you are feeling about the wedding, Kathy. I had trouble at my sisters wedding. They held it at an old time pioneer village and there were picnic tables and booths to sit at for the reception area and NOTHING else. Thankfully we had helped decorate the day before (hubby and I) and we found a stack of chairs with no arms that we pulled up to opposite ends of a picnic table. No one realized WHY we had done that. Only my mom knew the real reason.

I hope you find a really cute comfortable outfit to wear! Thats so important!!

Happy Birthday Serenity!!!

Thanks tc40! How did your bday go stephanie?

My actual birthday is on the 22nd of the month but I'm going to celebrate quietly on that day with my daughter and a slice of cake, just one slice on my birthday.

I would say that people are getting larger. If restaurant owners don't want to cater to us, they will lose money. If they want to cram in too many tables so there isn't space, they will lose money. If they provide substandard furniture which breaks easily, they will lose money. It is our choice which restaurants to go to, and we are likely to go to places which are welcoming and provide a good atmosphere and customer service, including plenty of space and good quality comfortable furniture.

If you wanted to stay at home, why get takeout? To me it would be more special to have a proper birthday meal cooked for me by my family and they would be happy to do so if that is what I wanted. I would probably share in the cooking too, since it is a fun communal activity. It would be cheaper and I could choose exactly what I wanted.

As for people looking, mostly they aren't. But if they have really boring lives and their best source of entertainment is laughing at others, you just have to feel sad for them. It's pathetic to act like them, don't like these losers live rent-free in your head.

Snippy is right. Live for today, be grateful for what you have. Don't worry about what others are doing or what might not happen.

Stephanie, I hope my opinion won't hurt you but I think you have body dysmorphic disorder. I have been suffering from it all my life. Most people never realize that the body image they have in their head is totally different from the body they have.
I know there is a hard but amazing journey behind you, you have lost a lot of weight. You need to get rid of that weight in your mind, too.
But hey, if you don't feel like going out, don't do it.
I meet people a lot because I work as a teacher but anyway I spend most of my free time with my books and I couldn't be happier.
It's fine if you prefer to celebrate at home but the reason for it shouldn't be your weight.
First of all you are much much thinner than you think, secondly you have a really nice personality, you should share it with the world, and thirdly (it's a minor one but it's connected to the topic) the restaurants are for YOU (and for all the other costumers) so they would be lucky to have you.

Thanks Gondwana. You could be really right about thinking I look different than I actually do. I mean I was a lot heavier a year ago and I did go out once in a while. I guess I still compare myself to the skinny me from 13 years ago all the while realizing that coming to the place of obesity for me was a lot of different life changing factors that I have since been working on. I also know that obesity for me is not going to always be a way of life as I am working really hard to get out of it. I need to embrace myself where I am at and realize that I shouldn't stop my life because of this and there is more to me than my weight. Thank you for helping me see that.

Make life easier on ourselves.
rest. call around/call ahead to c if they can n will make accomidations, n to make resivations.
Other than salad n occassional salad w soup, I don't know why anybody would want to go to pigs trogh/buffa.
Make rest reservations, n have manager to set up a table w y patio chair/s for my guest n myself. If needed take patio fold up chair to rest.

Regarding office chair, Make life less stressful n easy on yourself. simply buy desk for your desk, n have it delv to your offc desk.

I have what I refer to as a man size desk chair, n man size recliner. when I was 422 they were big enough for my butt.
I didn't half to have seats special ordered.

Stephanie, my pleasure. You had already known this but sometimes we all need reminders. :) I think you are doing really well so I would like you to be happier and more optimistic. Your achievements rock.