I'm a domestic abuse survivor as well I remember the stress I went through going through the divorce and child custody. It does get better and exercise helps get the stress out. Having something else to focus on besides what you're going through will help so finding something to keep busy makes a big difference. Being idle will just cause you to think about it more. Eat well too cause that will make you feel better .

Try your best to eat better bur stressful times are a hard time to buckle down and focus on losing weight I am sorry for the bad times and hopefully ir gets easier. Maybe stick to a simple eating plan an you can follow. Have alternates to replace weakness like me its sweets!

Sounds to me as if your doctor is at best ignorant, acting solely on your diabetes in isolation - do they know about the DV? If so they should refer you for counselling and support. There is no way you can get motivated to lose weight on your own if you are suffering the effects of DV. You need the full support of a team of healthcare professionals. You could also find Dv support sites and hotlines if you haven't already, it may help to speak to others who have been through similar experiences.

Hi there tpk1981

I agree with some of the other comments, losing weight can be difficult at the best of times!

Have you considered therapy / counselling for your eating, divorce and domestic violence which must be incredibly painful for you.

I don't believe in diets and that comes from decades of trying and working in eating disorder services for the last 6 years as well as mountains of research and campaigning.

I think it is actually quite ironic, because perhaps in order for our bodies to return to their 'natural' and 'healthy' weight, we might benefit from moving out focus away from weight loss and to understanding why we eat more than our body needs in the first place.

There seems to be a lot going on for you right now and perhaps embarking on a commercial diet would cause more stress?

Take Care, Leanne

I agree with Leanne, but have no professional training, myself. It just seems to me that dieting in general, or "eating less", any type of calorie restriction, trying to consume less than you burn, just causes you to burn less than you consume, probably through lowering thyroid levels.

The one "diet" that "worked" for me for a while, giving me more energy to do things was what I consider to be a general plan for healthy eating:
3 meals daily
3 snacks daily
5 types of foods:
1- Water - at each meal and each snack
2- Veggies (any type, no limit) - at each meal excluding breakfast unless wanted, and at each snack.
3- Whole Grains - at each meal
4- Protein - at each meal
5- Fruit and sweets, fats, etc.
Avoiding only caffeine and other drugs not recommended by your doctor, and avoiding trans fats and artificial sweeteners.
Eating enough for "pleasant satisfaction" but learning to stop eating after that point.

Even if there are times when you over-do it with the eating, the bulk of what you eat passes through you.

Realize that you are a person of great worth and are loved. You have friends here, and I hope you find love and support by someone in real life as well. Hugs.