Loneliness Support Group

Loneliness is an emotional state in which a person experiences a powerful feeling of emptiness and isolation. Loneliness is more than the feeling of wanting company or wanting to do something with another person. Loneliness is a feeling of being cut off, disconnected and alienated from other people. The lonely person may find it difficult or even impossible to have any...

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/ Loneliness Support Group

I feel so alone, please help.

everythingsfine
everythingsfine
Please help me. I feel very scared. This Christmas was horrible. Most of my family is dead. My dad is dead. I have four siblings and three are dead. The one of two uncles I have that actually liked me is dead. My husband divorced to me. All I have is my mom and I am slowly losing her to Dementia. I went to see her yesterday (Christmas) in assisted-living. It was awful. Mom and I stared at the floor in her assisted-living bedroom. I kept having to explain things over and over and tell her who's dead over and over. Every few minutes she'd realize her beloved dog isn't there and would start crying again. I have never felt so alone in my life and my heart is breaking. I reached out to my friends for support and nobody answered me. I guess they are not real friends, even though I thought they were very good, close friends, some whom I've had since high school (I'm 45). Absolutely NOBODY cares about me or the hell I am going through and I feel so alone it's SCARY. I am scared. Sometimes I wonder if maybe I'm a ghost and that's why people ignore me. That's how invisible and alone I feel. Why do my friends ignore me when I am most in need? Does anyone see this post? I'm so alone. I feel like I fell into a cave and nobody can hear me.
billwfriend
billwfriend
I know the agony of having a parent go into the dementia stuff...My dad died of alzheimers and he needed things repeated for a long time but then he just wasn't even there any more.....only real communication that he made near end was blowing razberries.....it is very hard to see a loved one decline like that....I am lucky he is no longer in that state as he passed away in 09....mom is still fully cognizant but she too is needing things repeated now but she is 90 so that is to be expected....I am sorry your friends did not reply...what did you do text them or leave voice mails? I would hope you can plan to get together with them to relieve some stress that the holidays let you feel.....

we are here to be supportive some of us are better than others but you will enjoy this site....hugs bill
lovingmyselfirst
lovingmyselfirst
im sorry for your pain. there is so much pain in the world right now....try to go out for a walk, do something nice for yourself...maybe your friends are busy now...make new friends by joining meetups.com
hugs
USTIMON
USTIMON
I'm sorry you are feeling so lonely. Many of us struggle with a sense of alone-ness as we get older, as family members pass away and as estrangements happen. My mother had alzhiemers...I miss her, even though she was often hard to deal with in general. My father has passed...siblings are spread out all over and I only really talk to one on the phone. My only child...there is mental illness and estrangement there and though I am married/am fortunate to have him in my life, loneliness is something I've felt for most of my 50 years. Times have been stressful, certain things unrealized and not accomplished and often there's not much support out there but I keep trying.
I volunteer for a mental health org, I have my beautiful dog and knowing I have a roof over my head, puts me in gratitude mode.

I wish I had friends. I don't really have any, except for a few people online. Basically, being alone most hours of the day. So, that's why I joined here. Anyway, stay encouraged - no matter what, know that your life and you have much value and strangers across many miles can relate to your state of sadness and loneliness. That has got to mean something...
BlueYonderDreams
BlueYonderDreams
Hello. You are not alone. There are people here for you. I can totally relate to feeling invisible and alone. It is very painful at times. But you're not invisible on here. I don't know for sure why your friends ignore you. They may just not know what to do/say and avoid. It's not right, but that's how people tend to deal with it.
USTIMON
USTIMON
@blueyonder, sometimes there's no rhyme or reason to why people ignore us. Then again, sometimes, maybe, there's something about us that makes others feel a little intimidated or something even if we are gentle souls. I'm not sure why but this has been the case with me.

The saying 'to have friends you have to be a friend' isn't true for me at all. I don't like drawing attention to myself but like to help others. I just try to be as genuine as possible but most people ignore me in the sense that most of what I say goes unresponded to.. For eg., I run a mental health website for a long time, I provide resources and feedback and support to people who go there. Most people either don't respond to my posts or ignore them but respond to others. It's as if they've come to expect Ill always be there. So even in cyberspace when people come to gether to be supportive of one another, it feels like I'm the odd man out. unfortunately, I've experienced the same kind of shunning, I have in real time. Of course, I don't show it bothers me but it makes me feel terribly lonely. So when we give of our selves and it gets taken for granted, it hurts.
ann54
ann54
I am so sorry for the difficult Christmas wih your mom. my friend mom has Alzheimer's and I see what she goes through, it is so painful. do your friends know how alone and lonely you feel? if you haven't felt comfortable talking to them about your issues maybe there is 1 friend you can confide in. many people get nervous and don't know what t say or how to handle different lives then their own, this is where we find are true friends. you will make many here, keep posting.
gracenme
gracenme
hi im sorry for how you feel, I too feel that way and I have the same situation with friends and family that all has passed. I am sorry about your mom, I have a neighbor with a mom like that and it gets so hard. I don't know if it would help to join the support group for those dealing with family members with Dementia. That has got to tough. As you can see there is someone here to vent to if you want..
zoidberg
zoidberg
I'm so sorry for all of the loss in your life that you've had to endure so far. Taking care of someone with dementia is a hard thing to do. I helped take of my dad at home for roughly 17yrs after he developed dementia from going on a drinking binge after retiring so I can relate to what you are going through. As far feeling like you are invisible I know that feeling too and hurts more than anyone can know. Hugs
LoveAlice
LoveAlice
That is so horrible that your friends are ignoring you. And you have been friends with them for so long so they SHOULD be true friends. One would think anyway.... You reached out to them for help. I am so sorry they are not helping you. That is awful that they are treating you that way by ignoring you.

I am sorry that so many people are that are close to you are dead. That must be so hard. And dealing with you mom in her state must also be really hard too. I am sorry.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I know how you feel. I've felt lonely most of my life and it doesn't get any better as you age.
everythingsfine
everythingsfine
Hi everyone, I'm so sorry! I never got any notifications that there were replies, I'm going to go read them now. So sorry for being quiet!
everythingsfine
everythingsfine
Thank you everyone for your replies! I just read them all. To each of you, Thank you so much! I wish I had seen the replies earlier. I'm also glad I came back tonight to check. Today I felt so alone it was scary. I cried so hard I was afraid my neighbors (paper-thin walls) thought I was losing it. Although, I was losing it. But after a nap I feel a little better. @gracenme, your doggie looks SO much like my American Eskimo that my husband took w/ him when we divorced (he was his baby, our pug is my baby). I noticed a lot of you have your doggie as your user photo. I have a Pug. He is my life, he is so sweet and smart. Animals are wonderful.
everythingsfine
everythingsfine
Do you all journal here at DS? I used to. Now that I am back, I ought to start up again.
PokemonKid
PokemonKid
I am so sorry to hear what you are going through. Sometimes friends who don't care step out of our life for a reason. It's to let people who really will support you into your life and I promise you will find that. Keep looking for support groups, talking to people who understand, and try to stay active as possible. Take care of yourself and surround yourself with positive people. If someone doesn't support you and uplift you, then they don't matter. You're not alone. You have so many people on this site that are more than willing to listen and try to help in the best way possible.
Have you looked into support groups in your area? It may be a good outlet. Until you can find one keep close to your online friends who DO understand. They are just as valuable as friends in person no matter what anyone says.
You're going to get through this. I have faith in you. Keep staying strong. You're welcome to talk to me any time.
2sis7luv
2sis7luv
I feel your pain. You have suffered SO MUCH loss. I think it is a GREAT idea to search out a local support group for those who have family members with Alzheimer's. That would be a way to make some new friends locally. I also agree with the post that sometimes, people (friends) do not know how to deal with your situation so they avoid. I suffer from loneliness (empty nest and a dh who is more a room mate) and I am VERY THANKFUL for my little dog who is a puppy mill survivor. If people could be more like dogs, think how beautiful the world would be!!
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