Loneliness Support Group
Loneliness is an emotional state in which a person experiences a powerful feeling of emptiness and isolation. Loneliness is more than the feeling of wanting company or wanting to do something with another person. Loneliness is a feeling of being cut off, disconnected and alienated from other people. The lonely person may find it difficult or even impossible to have any...
I set 2 alarm clocks to be sure I'd wake up on time. Surprisingly I woke up 3 hours early, very weird. I puttered online, drank a yogurt smoothie, after I fed Annie cat. I discovered that due to brain fog I overpaid a plumbing company. If I'd been clearer, I'd have done my homework and paid $100 less. Sure will miss that much needed money, sigh! Especially since my wall is cold and wet. Don't ask, another repairman is coming to visit soon.
So I went to the doctor for results and found out the next step. I need repairs also. OK. I figured that. We have a plan. Good. Then I went to a Restore. Wanted to check it out. They are sponsored by Habitat for Humanity. Have lots of great items at very low cost. Interesting, had a good walk, looked around, bought zip, but I liked it very much.
Why am I telling you this? I'm breaking up the lonely cycle of living alone, being alone so much. Hearing this week that this journey on the way to seeking SSA disability I have been declared permanently disabled by the LTD people this week. They say I am not able to be vocationally rehabilitated. It's not a surprise, it just feels like another nail in the life coffin sort of...something you have to digest...not exactly a happy dance.
I need to continue to seek other ways to be useful in this life. Ways to bring joy to others, to be purposeful. I have challenges...not limitations...it's all about perception! Today I bought some coloring books. I already have the crayons!!! LOL...I bought a sketch pad, but it wasn't going very well. I never was much of an artist. with cognitive challenges, I was frustrating myself...so today I decided to try a new tact.
I'm smiling...me, at my age...coloring...why not? It will bring me quiet happy comfort...so that's the plan! Having chronic illness/chronic pain can lead me down a path that invades my thinking, my emotions...I don't want to live in a box of hurt and anger. I refuse, I've been there, done that. It's worse that being in the MRI tube for hours at a time. I choose to NOT. I know I will have some times when I will feel low or blue, but I don't have to be that way all the time......I can recalibrate.....I can gift myself with
COMPASSION
I am reading a story about a woman who lives an ordinary life in the most extraordinary way...it makes me laugh out loud.
Next I am going to read a book about a 12 year old girl who wanted to meet the governor of every state in the US and made it a reality. That is not my dream, I am not even particularly political...I am just fascinated that someone so young, had such a strong dream and lived it...got others behind her to help her make it happen.
I am choosing to help myself think fresh thoughts, my next book is about how to begin living a new life from this day forward, after that I have a book to read about how to make decisions that I won't regret.
I am setting goals to recalibrate. It takes time to reset and change old habits...and replace them with new thinking. I have been doing this now since July 2010. It is crazy amazing to me, how little it costs...I buy these books at thrift stores...I crack up because I plan to buy a thriller or a book on history or medical information..and I look down and see something entirely different. It's like an evil plot to reboot my life to joy and peace.............................................................................sneaky.
I have such an urge to get some Play Doh next.....whoo hoo!
Hugs!
So I went to the doctor for results and found out the next step. I need repairs also. OK. I figured that. We have a plan. Good. Then I went to a Restore. Wanted to check it out. They are sponsored by Habitat for Humanity. Have lots of great items at very low cost. Interesting, had a good walk, looked around, bought zip, but I liked it very much.
Why am I telling you this? I'm breaking up the lonely cycle of living alone, being alone so much. Hearing this week that this journey on the way to seeking SSA disability I have been declared permanently disabled by the LTD people this week. They say I am not able to be vocationally rehabilitated. It's not a surprise, it just feels like another nail in the life coffin sort of...something you have to digest...not exactly a happy dance.
I need to continue to seek other ways to be useful in this life. Ways to bring joy to others, to be purposeful. I have challenges...not limitations...it's all about perception! Today I bought some coloring books. I already have the crayons!!! LOL...I bought a sketch pad, but it wasn't going very well. I never was much of an artist. with cognitive challenges, I was frustrating myself...so today I decided to try a new tact.
I'm smiling...me, at my age...coloring...why not? It will bring me quiet happy comfort...so that's the plan! Having chronic illness/chronic pain can lead me down a path that invades my thinking, my emotions...I don't want to live in a box of hurt and anger. I refuse, I've been there, done that. It's worse that being in the MRI tube for hours at a time. I choose to NOT. I know I will have some times when I will feel low or blue, but I don't have to be that way all the time......I can recalibrate.....I can gift myself with
COMPASSION
I am reading a story about a woman who lives an ordinary life in the most extraordinary way...it makes me laugh out loud.
Next I am going to read a book about a 12 year old girl who wanted to meet the governor of every state in the US and made it a reality. That is not my dream, I am not even particularly political...I am just fascinated that someone so young, had such a strong dream and lived it...got others behind her to help her make it happen.
I am choosing to help myself think fresh thoughts, my next book is about how to begin living a new life from this day forward, after that I have a book to read about how to make decisions that I won't regret.
I am setting goals to recalibrate. It takes time to reset and change old habits...and replace them with new thinking. I have been doing this now since July 2010. It is crazy amazing to me, how little it costs...I buy these books at thrift stores...I crack up because I plan to buy a thriller or a book on history or medical information..and I look down and see something entirely different. It's like an evil plot to reboot my life to joy and peace.............................................................................sneaky.
I have such an urge to get some Play Doh next.....whoo hoo!
Hugs!
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I know this is stupid, but after not being able to find a job after graduation for almost two years, I ended up just taking an online teaching job because I couldn't find anything in my field. I was trying to get out of teaching and I feel so devastated. I felt this crushing feeling when I signed the paperwork and when I was in the meetings. I know that sounds so dramatic but it is how I felt. It...
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Tomorrow is National Massachusetts Day!Have you ever lived in or visited Massachusetts? If so, tell us what's great about the Bay State!
I sometimes wish I could live alone. I live with my boyfriend and his mom now. There is never time for me alone in the house.
I used to play the tv and music too but no more.
I know you can find things to do with your life like it sounds like you are now. I feel that there is never enough time in life to do anything.
You should feel good that you have what you feel is a lot of time on your hands. Sorry to hear that you overpaid the bill.
Just thought but you could maybe call them and ask about it.
Maybe if nothing else you could use the money towards the next repair.
I don't explain very well sometimes...I mean this company overcharges! Other companies charge more reasonable fees.
I should have made two more calls, gotten two more bids. This is on me. My cognitive error. I woke up to water on the floor, a migraine, back pain, a flare and made one call. (not enough...sigh)
It is good that my doctor ordered me to stop working. She told me I had two choices. Work and die or stop and save my life. It was pretty clear cut. I had been living in denial and running the show on stubborness for years, putting my life at risk for quite some time. She finally had enough of my shenanigans. I was pretty lost and miserable at first, curled up into a ball. I was really sick, but in time, I started to come to and figure out how to live a new way.
Yes, I have time on my hands as you say...but it comes with a price. I am isolated most of the time. Chronic illness is very limiting. I am learning to say challenging, but it is a much smaller world. I can not walk far, do much, can not drive far, socialize much or well. In the last year, based on hours spent with others all told, I spent 11 out of 12 months alone. That is too much alone time. It is not ideal. I don't say it to seek pity, I say it to give you a slice of my reality....I do keep my mind as occupied as I can. I do try to keep myself content. I worry about my spirit. Staying connected with others is important. DS has helped me a lot, I have made many friends here.
I know you need time for yourself also.....you need space and time to do your own thing. You need time to listen to music, watch some tv, to pursue creative endeavors and just do your own thing!!!! No one has a perfect environment. I hope you and I can both find an appreciation for what we do have and seek ways to make what we do have, what we get to do......to have a better balance in the days to come.....sending you hugs!
Happy recalibrating.
coloring books..the clerk prob thought you had kids..LOL
I am glad to have decided to read about your day....hugs bill