My older son did not take the news well. He adored his grandfather. He and his wife have suspected for a while. His wife's mom was abused also and we have had many talks, they must of over heard some. But, to actually hear it was hard.

Made first contact with Fl law enforcement. I now make the next step and call my local sheriff's office to file the complaint. I feel like bricks are being taken off my shoulders. My hubby doesn't understand. Does it sound strange?

That's awesome! I can understand your relief. I have never disclosed that my dad abused me, and I feel like I am a toxic waste container, holding it in for everyone's protection all these years. Good for you for laying down that burden, and bless you for it!

Thanks so much donnawanda.

You're Very brave Bobo :) GL with the process!! Are you in therapy? it's helped me alot.

Yes, lots of therapy.

Next step, my local sheriff's department called back this morning. They are going to reach out to Fl to find out how Fl wants the paperwork and interviews done. Everyone has been so great and supportive. I am encouraged that this nightmare will end with the bad guy in jail.

Wow, that's amazing! I feel like you are doing this for much more than yourself - it is a victory for all of us!

I have not replied to many of the post here but, all of you have inspired me to keep this ball rolling.

The police officers I have talked to say that my situation is not uncommon. They have been very nice to talk to. Next week I see my detective for the first time and swear out my complaint.

You have a lot of guts Bobohurts!! A lot of people are firmly behind you on this, including myself- you're ABSOLUTELY doing the right thing.

That is what prompted this whole thing. He said he wanted to travel with his camper now that my mom has passed away. The horror of him in a camp ground with little kids and his cute little dog. He is not going to be allowed another chance to hurt someone again.

Careful of Richie D. The pro-incest lobby gets in everywhere. No survivor of incest would ever use the term "family ties" because we all know that an incestuous family is not a real family. It is every incest victim's duty to report even if the perpetrator is dead so that the statistics are out there.

You are a hero ! If you have your brother as a witness, go through with it! Thank you, on behalf of incest victims everywhere.

Thank you. Everyone here is my hero. I needed to find a place where I could be me and ask hard questions. The replies have helped keep me going and push this even in the dark times. We all know there are dark times.

I agree that pro-incest people are found in many places, and they could even be on DS.

I'm not one of them. The main reason I was so loyal to my family was because I was in denial. The only clear memories I had of incest were memories of times when I was eight and my sister was eighteen. Those memories didn't emerge from denial and selective amnesia until fairly recently.

But like many of us, I bear enough of the signs that it's very likely there was much more beneath the surface that my mind repressed. Memories of the early years can be very difficult to recover.

My original family is all deceased now, only I and my sister remain. She is in a nursing home diagnosed with dementia and claims she doesn't remember who I am. So there's no one to prosecute for what happened after so many years have gone by.

I heard rumors floating around of inappropriate conduct between adults and children in the family for years, but it's hard to judge based on rumors. My family members were always warring with each other.

If I knew for sure anyone was sexually abusing a child, I would report it. I wouldn't care if it was the Pope doing it...or the ruler of the Mafia. We all have a responsibility to protect the children. All sexual interaction between an adult and a child is rape...both legally and morally.

But it's not easy for some, I understand that. They may have been raised since early childhood to protect their family from outsiders at all costs. I don't presume to speak for others, or place any burden on them to report long-ago abuse. I do hope that all abusers get prosecuted, though...especially the ones who wield authority and have access to children.