Heart Attack Support Group
Heart attack is a serious, sudden heart condition usually characterized by varying degrees of chest pain or discomfort, weakness, sweating, nausea, vomiting, and arrhythmias, sometimes causing loss of consciousness. It occurs when the blood supply to a part of the heart is interrupted, causing death and scarring of the local heart tissue.
Are you terrified of death?
This was a question that was posed on a little survey in another support group.
What I found interesting was that I don't find myself afraid of death because I know I will die someday. But I do find myself scared to death of another heart attack.
Heart attacks sometimes lead to death so why do I separate it? Just a thought.
What do you think?
This was a question that was posed on a little survey in another support group.
What I found interesting was that I don't find myself afraid of death because I know I will die someday. But I do find myself scared to death of another heart attack.
Heart attacks sometimes lead to death so why do I separate it? Just a thought.
What do you think?
.
john
p.s. oh rich love the new name
Did our Johnny just write reply #12? I never knew a "Chicago Hood" could be so introspective and eloquent at the same time. Still has trouble with the shift key on the i's but I'll take inspiration over 'white out' any day. Good stuff John. Pretty soon you will have your own column in the "Chicago Tribune" called quite simply as "Here's Johnny"
Thanks Brother,
Love you too,
Just Joe
Pam
john
p.s. joe you always make me laugh that one was good.Those days are long gone my shrink made me !..........lol
You know, I think none of us could imagine what that would be like. I have tried, like , your best feeling multiplied many times, ALL the people you knew, will ever know , and never knew.... you will know? and love? Very hard to imagine. The day my father died, he asked me that age old question..... Do you think there is anything after this?He made me look deeper, I am a spiritual person, and I really was caught off gaurd. I said" Dad, when I look at the stars in the sky, Why are they there? It is so magnificent that they HAD to be created. Later that day I saw the light go out of his eyes.
I also died and was paddled back, I do not remember that. I try to find simple answers or at least an easy way to deal with difficult questions.
I always think of the seeds that you plant and hope they will grow. Many studies have tried to answer when that "spark" of life begins and the seed tranforms into the growing life that it will become. I think none have, and I beleive that to be as mysterious as its death .....
Im no philosopher, not even sure I can spell it!!
Good subject!
i run a lot, about 20 km per week (2x10km) and the fear is always constant. I am acutely aware of all and any niggle, pain anywhere on my body,
Look at being afraid of death as living a life on a tiny speck of land surrounded by a deadly gorge. Across the gorge as far as the eye can see there are new things going on you have never had the chance to experience. The only way to get to those things is to cross this rickity old bridge that looks like it will collapse at any time. If your afraid to take a chance now and then you will never get to experience life.
PS. But do go to extremes and try to jump over the gorge.
BDT
john
I always fear of death, it's the unknown. Until like Joe or Johnny wrote about it was peaceful feelings.
I was taught in sunday school or church that there is life after death.
I just knew this. Did I really believe it? I hope to just like I believe in God I can't see him, I know he hears me! I just know.
As a child all I had was God growing up. My mother gave me away at 7 yo.
I won't go into what happen to me...........but one thing I had God with me. And I knew I would be ok.
I think that is what I feel I have God with me even today. Sometimes I don't understand why I come down with weird things and not that bad as far as I understand yet. Maybe warnings? I don't know.
I seem to be one of the older people in this group. I am scared I will go and not finish something? I don't know maybe my kids need me? I have COPD I never smoke, I have ask myself why me. I think after I die I will know that answer better.
I don't know if I will make it to 80 yo? When my mother was alive she hardly got ill, and she live to be 92. Her mother, my grandmother live to be 86 I think I remember that right?
I had a great aunt Ruth who live to be over 106. Most of my mothers side of the family live to be older.
My father died at 70 he had several HA since I was a teenager before that.
His mother died at the same or near the same age also HA.
I hope I live to be 70 now.
I guess I am in Gods hands what he wants for me and my family.
Lately most of my family has pass away.
My husband family has started doing that already. WAY too young too.
My husband sister younger then us died several years ago she had cancer. Her whole life ahead of her doing so well and stricken down at 50.
My husband sister in law died a couple of years ago after battling cancer of the breast 3 times the last one got her. I pray that night I believe in my heart she came to visit me. I won't go into it you might think of me crazy. But trust me It was true what I had experience.
It was to tell me she was ok.
My husband mother died may 30, 2008 it seems so fresh in my mind....she had cancer of the panitists (mis spell) and it was quick. She was in the hospital getting a pacemaker when she got ill. They put her in a home where the next week she died.
I remember how she look and how we couldn't touch her.
I think that bougher me the most when she died.
I am thinking I have not been told anything about if I had an HA, only that I show I have had one. They don't know when I had the HA. I just had lots of chest pains for a long time.
It is not like all of you explain. I guess I must of skated thru I don't know what happen?
I do know that my insurance refuse to pay for all these tests so I couldn't go back to the Cardo I first saw. So I didn't go to another Cardo for sometime.
When I did he said to me which was differnt that "why would I want to have an angogram done"? so he brush me off.
I just went back to work as nothing happen and I was ok.
But I guess I wasn't ok.
I started having the chest pain again not until this 3rd Cardo who refuse to let me go back to work once I was in the ER. She found 3 blockages. And I guess you could say she save my life.
How weird I fought off any knowledge there was anything wrong.
I don't show the usual signs that is weird to me.
They put in the stint.........I went back to work driving my school bus.
I still had chest pains. I wasn't aloud by my boss to miss any more work. I had to go to rehab by his words on my own time.
But I had to go to the hospital for rehab. I coudln't do it.
SO FOR ME I NEVER HAD REHAB! I don't know much so I came here and found all of you.
I learn so much from all of you.
Still I don't know if the pain I do experience is real. Should I or shouldn't I still learks around me for getting help any more.
I did show the last time some evadance (mis spell) of a HA again in my blood work up. But the cardo PA didn't think so.
I fired them nicely by just saying I will be coming once a year to them.....because I want another opion. I haven't done that yet.
I need to find me a new doctor.
But to think of dying......I guess I am going kicking and that's me....
Until I feel whatever God wants to change my mind.
I put myself in his hands.
Thank you for letting me have the box..........I am done.
Ruthie/bee
I signed onto DS tonight specifically looking to post on this discussion thread, thinking the thread would have dropped way down on the list, and lo and behold, you had just added a post this morning!
I appreciate what you wrote. It's been clear that you are a strong survivor, and hearing a bit about your childhood explains how you came to be that way. I share your confidence in life after death, and I agree that it's a source of peace and comfort.
It's weird how there's not always as much rhyme and rhythm as would seem fair about who dies when and who gets what disease, like in your family, and your getting COPD. And as I've said previously, I totally agree with your frustration about how your health care coverage limits your care and options at times. It shouldn't be that way. I agree with your idea of getting a new doctor for a second opinion, and I hope you do that soon (please tell us).
As the prison where I work, I lead a Grief & Loss recovery group with the women inmates on Mondays. We were talking about how some people believe their deceased loved one is at the gravesite, and some don't, and it reminded me of the following poem. I agreed to find the poem on the internet and bring it to them next week. I also found the story of it's authorship.
I decided to share all of that here. I imagine many of you are familiar with the poem. I don't think of my deceased loved one as being at their graves- I think of it more like how it's described in the poem. I tried to read it to my husband, and on the first attempt, I had to stop when I started to cry.
I hope you all enjoy the poem.
DO NOT STAND AT MY GRAVE AND WEEP
Do not stand at my grave and weep,
I am not there, I do not sleep.
I am in a thousand winds that blow,
I am the softly falling snow.
I am the gentle showers of rain,
I am the fields of ripening grain.
I am in the morning hush,
I am in the graceful rush
Of beautiful birds in circling flight,
I am the starshine of the night.
I am in the flowers that bloom,
I am in a quiet room.
I am in the birds that sing,
I am in each lovely thing.
Do not stand at my grave bereft
I am not there. I have not left.
THE BACKGROUND:
Mary Frye, who was living in Baltimore at the time, wrote the poem in 1932. She had never written any poetry, but the plight of a young German Jewish woman, Margaret, who was staying with her and her husband, inspired the poem. She wrote it down on a brown paper shopping bag. Margaret had been concerned about her mother, who was ill in Germany, but she had been warned not to return home because of increasing anti-semitic unrest. When her mother died, the heartbroken young woman told Frye that she never had the chance to stand by my mothers grave and shed a tear. Frye found herself composing a piece of verse on a brown paper shopping bag. Later she said that the words just came to her and expressed what she felt about life and death. Mary Frye circulated the poem privately. Because she never published or copyrighted it, there is no definitive version. She wrote other poems, but this, her first, endured. Her obituary in The Times made it clear that she was the author of the famous poem, which has been recited at funerals and on other appropriate occasions around the world for seventy years.
Having and engineering backround and embracing logic over faith for most of my life, I have come to understand that universally with a scientific and spiritual slant to support the theory. "Nothing is Created or Destroyed, It merely changes shape and form". This fact is scientifically sound but also does not step on an eternity which is suggested in the bible and other works of philosophy.
Great Poem a "Mantra in my Book"
Thanks for sharing.
Pam