I have a close friend who said he was brainwashed because of the church. It took him 15 years of therapy to get over it. He married a woman that the 'church' deemed appropriate for a 'wholesome wife'. He ended up divorced a few times.

I hope you are getting lots of sex with this new girlfriend. Obviously if she loves it so much you should not be 'missing out'
anymore.

If I was you I wouldn't waste time getting jealous. I'd spend my time trying to make for lost time. Get a few young hotties round for an orgy (i'm sure your girl is keen). Pay them if you have to.... I would

I wish..unfortunately since she went through menopause she has cut way back on sex and now says she is not interested in any of her old lifestyle which includes orgies.

So while we get a long real well, still have trouble with having sex. She told me she could take it or leave it now. And she refuses to take hormones so pretty much stuck. Another problem is, she lives in Sacramento and I live in Vegas so it is a 9 hour trip to drive there. So we see each other every two or three months. While that is good in that we are not so close together that we get on each others nerves, kind of limits the sex when we do finally have it.
Before I met her (online) I tried to find a woman here locally but had no success. I am surprised I got with her. My sex life is so bad that I could be at a Cheap Whore Convention with $100 dollar bills sticking out of my pockets and still not get laid... ROFLMAO...

"If I was you I wouldn't waste time getting jealous. I'd spend my time trying to make for lost time. Get a few young hotties round for an orgy (i'm sure your girl is keen). Pay them if you have to.... I would "

Now here is a girl after my own heart. I like this woman!!!!

I would not like to hear that my significant other slept with that many other men.... That is beyond wreckless and when she told me i would ask her to be tested for diseases.. you can only roll the dice so many times before you catch something. I hope she told you this prior to you two getting married... also i dont like to think someone is comparing me to someone else even if i have better sex with her than she had with him... Its great to know the cliffnotes ie how many men... but i dont want to know the moves he had or how satisfying he was for her...

I guess it's a natural response for you to get jealous. As long as you know that you're satisfying her, then that's all that matters! If I were you, I wouldn't worry too much about it. It may be her way of telling you that she was once desired by many men! :)

It's not that fact that she was with so many men, most of the women (so far have been with 6) I have ended up with have pretty much been around circuit many times (except for my wife who claimed to be a virgin when we got married, she was 17 and wanted to get out of her home and I was the way to escape), one worked as a call girl previously, and one was a stripper (she did pornos, men, women and on a $1000 bet she did a dog). So it is not the number of guys that I am envious of, it is the experiences they describe that I am jealous of. I guess I am more "envious" would have been a better description than the word jealous.

Besides one takes what you can get. Locally the only woman I could get was a married woman and we had a brief fling till she got a case of conscience and cut off the physical part of the relationship. She had been around quite a bit also and she was almost the same age as my oldest son, so didn't really see much future ahead of us and she would never leave her husband and kids anyway (even though she said she wanted to.

Unfortunately as I mentioned in a previous post, the new girlfriend has gone through menopause and the only way she can get aroused now is by watching sex videos, for some reason, "She-males" and animals having sex (with each other not with humans) seem to be the only thing that will get her interested. She refuses to take any hormone replacements. She has told me that way back when she was in her early 20's she was treated for STD's but she has a clean bill of health now.

LOL As for making up for lost time, I would love to... paying is not an option, the prices here are ridiculous $500 bucks just to show up and anything after that is a lot extra. Trust me I checked. The Brothels here in Nevada are not cheap either. If they had been, I would have been out enjoying myself from the time I moved here.

I spent almost 5 years in forced celibacy in my dating search, finally resorting to going online and my present girlfriend was the closest female that responded and as I think I said, she lives almost 600 miles away. The females here seem to go for younger guys with lots of money ( I am retired Air Force and on disability so not rolling in dough but comfortable).

Over the years, from my very early 20's on, I have had a lot of female friends but have always been the "buddy" who was there for them to come crying over the latest bad relationship. I have brought up sex with them and got the "Youre too nice" or "you're like my brother" or "I don't want to ruin a good friendship" so even though the women were there, the opportunity wasn't. I can't help but wonder if I had ignored the religious brainwashing as a teen and taken advantage of the situations that presented themselves, if things would have been different.

WOW ...
For once I am speechless. What a situation! ~~~hugs~~~

What exactly is it that you're jealous about?

Is it some fear/anxiety that she could easily find someone else and leave you if she wanted to?

Or is it a more general jealousy/insecurity that other people have had a much wilder time than you, at least on paper?

Personally I'd rather go for quality over quantity, so I'm not going to play that 'comparing' game with anyone else.

And as for the ex who had sex with a dog, all I can say is wtf? How the hell does that constitute having a good time in bed???

Perhaps you need to treat yourself with a bit more respect rather than taking the distinctly un-sexy attitude that you'll "take what you can get." Maybe by raising your own standards and recognising your own worth you'll start to seem a bit more attractive to someone who's worth having!

Awesome post, Phoenix. I agree completely.

OP: Value yourself for what and who you are. Don't envy others experiences...make your own happen.

There is no way that I believe that there is not a single woman in your local area who isn't interested in you. You just have to find her. She's probably not on the Internet...or in a brothel ;)

Basically it's the "Or is it a more general jealousy/insecurity that other people have had a much wilder time than you, at least on paper? " mainly because they DID/ARE have/Are having a much wilder time than me.

I look back on my life and realize that while I have done some moderately interesting stuff, I really haven't done the things I would have loved to try and do, not for lack of trying, but because I just never was in the right place at the right time or had the opportunity. My life has been pretty vanilla, in other words BORING!!

"Perhaps you need to treat yourself with a bit more respect rather than taking the distinctly un-sexy attitude that you'll "take what you can get." Maybe by raising your own standards and recognising your own worth you'll start to seem a bit more attractive to someone who's worth having."

Well, I tried raising my standards and found that the higher they were the less there was to choose from, and none of them were interested in me romantically. So I went where there were choices. In other words if you don't have any luck at the top, go to the bottom, at least you will get laid once in a while. Contrary to popular belief I am not a ladies man. LOL I do what I can but have found that I tend to be the best buddy and not a romantic interest for women in the higher standard level..

"OP: Value yourself for what and who you are. Don't envy others experiences...make your own happen.

There is no way that I believe that there is not a single woman in your local area who isn't interested in you. You just have to find her. She's probably not on the Internet...or in a brothel ;) "

Well looked around for 5 years here and had no luck which was why I ended up on the internet. The one "success" I had here, I was at a Craft fair and saw an attractive woman who was dressed not fancy but nicely. Went up and started a conversation with her and got a date. Picked her up and we had lunch and talked, she seemed real nice and I thought maybe things might be going my way, until she asked me for a ride to the rougher side of town. Let's just say, I found out where some crack houses were. So that kind of killed any romantic ideas I had. I had a girlfriend who OD'd back in Ohio and was not going through that again.

I went to a singles meetup here in Vegas and was talking to several ladies my age and I asked them why women their age were not out where single guys could find them, the general concensus was that most older women do not go out and stay home. They had come to the meetup just to mingle with people but were not interested in having any kind of relationship.

NO ! jealousy is a sign of insecurity and a relationship killer

I'm thinking you ought to reassess the way you present yourself to the world of potential partners.

I don't know you from Adam, but if that picture is of you, then for sure you have some work to do.

Get a haircut, lose the beard, shed some pounds.

Think of the things you find off-putting about other people and avoid being that way too.

It's about eliminating negatives.

Once you've done that, start adding positives to your life. Do things that are interesting. Add some spark to your life.

Dress well, be groomed, and have a positive attitude when you meet the random lady of interest. Be complimentary in a noncheesy way.

Don't waste your time trying to connect to women hundreds of miles away who tell you stories about their promiscuous past who now are not interested in sex.

Just because you haven't found your ideal woman, it doesn't mean you have to lower your standards to the point of women who do it with animals!

I think most people just find a safe comfortable in-between level - I know I'll never catch Johnny Depp, but I'm sure I can still do better than Ron Jeremy!

Well I am working on losing weight... Got depressed and gained a hundred pounds when I didn't leave the house for a year (the 5th year of my search) LOL Once I get back down to 200 then figure work on rest of looks.

I had the same problems when I weighed 180, had short hair and no beard. Same thing back then, I was the best buddy and not the romantic interest...