Probably the best thing is not to discuss your health issues too much and not tell
Him how much pain you are in..
I know we should be able to talk to our partners, but it is best not to make them our go-to person for illness.
I wish you all the best !

Thank you but he can see it on my face and the infected area. He knows when I'm hurting before I say anything about it

I would say to be sure to tell him just how grateful you are to have someone so thoughtful and special and to try to do what you can to let him know just how much you do appreciate and want to do for him.
(I have been in a one sided marriage for 17 years. It is a terrible thing when one continues to give but the other simply takes and gives nothing back)
My thoughts and prayers are with you and I hope your relationship continues to strengthen and grow. Hugs, Kim

I have chronic pain and am waiting for surgery that might alleviate part of the pain.. But my husband does not understand. When I let him know I was hurting he told me to suck it up. This caused me to stop telling him when I was in pain. Now I never tell him about my pain or health. The bad part about that is he does not see the pain and expects me to be able to function like a normal person.
So find the balance of letting him know when you are hurting and not burdening him with it. Tell him you are grateful for him and appreciate him. Do what you can for him. (Make his favorite meal if you can..if you have a craft hobby make him something from that)

Hello Sherita. Welcome to DS.

I don't believe we get to control the weather of "Good Times" or "Bad Times." the winds blow where they blow. However, good times or bad, I earnestly believe I find far more accurate information on how to keep my love strong by looking into eyes rather than on the internet. Does life get more personal or customized than eye contact?

Your hubby and my hubby may be equally good, but they are quite far from identical and/or interchangeable. Keep it personal. Customize, customize, customize.

Thank you all for the advice

I kind of agree. I have a chronic disease so I speak from experience. If you have a chronic condition or disease, it can kind of take over everything in your relationship, your conversations, your activities, your plans, etc. Find additional support outside your home, whether it's on a group forum, like DS or through in person support groups. I think it's ok to share with your partner when your condition is really acting up because they have a right to know when we are really in the weeds with an illness and it's affecting our ability to function. But they can never really understand because they haven't experienced it. So I keep my expectations of others' ability to "get it" pretty low. That said, when I tell my husband I'm really sick, he knows it must be bad because I only discuss things with him in any kind of detail when things have really gotten bad.

But otherwise, I think finding things to discuss beyond one's health issues is really super important, not only for your relationship, but for you as well. Otherwise, we just start acting like sick people all the time and I that's pretty depressing for all involved.

Make sure to listen to him, work all the time will leave him exhausted. When he asks how are you doing tell him in a loving way, he wants to know and is concerned.
Remember to have adult time, you and him time, and fun times.
You aren't dead so don't act like it, also find as many others as you can to talk to about your pain, so you don't feel neglected. The a good church can help.

Remember to encourage your husband to grow as well, in his career, hobbies, and to live. You two are partners in life, stay that way.

I have a chronic pain disease called Complex regional pain syndrome it's a nerve condition that attacks the whole body.

Gentle hug Sdtay…… Your husband sounds like a wonderful guy.... I agree that as much as you can discuss illness with your medical staff and peer support like DS..... Having a SO as a caregiver changes the dynamic of the relationship …..Keeping these things separate is probably the best thing you can do for the relationship.....
I'm sorry that you're struggling.....I have had shingles so I have some idea how painful nerve pain can be......xo