My boyfriend is super attentive when it comes to acts of service and gifts. He makes me coffee as soon as he sees me up, brings breakfast in bed on occasion, does most of the cooking and dishes, and surprises me with random little gifts that are usually really thoughtful. I think I should feel pampered, but the truth is, it’s not really my thing. I raised my kids almost entirely as a single mom and on a really tight budget for one thing, so, I’m not used to it and also find some of it kinda wasteful. I don’t want to be unappreciative and I do appreciate that he’s really thoughtful, like getting me a rose gold eyeglass cleaner because he saw it matched my phone, wallet, purse. It’s just not something I needed, even though it’s really sweet he pays enough attention to think “that matches her stuff!” The thing is, I’m much more a touch and words of affirmation person and I’ve talked to him about it. He seems to make an effort for a day or two, as far as hugs, kissing my forehead or holding my hand, then falls back into his usual routine, which also includes almost never initiating sex. I think he’s initiated a couple times in our relationship. Things usually start with me rubbing his arm or chest and then he may take the reins. I’m pretty sure if I never reached out or mentioned it, we’d barely touch and possibly never have sex. He says it’s just life stress and he’s not even been masturbating because he’s just got too much on his mind otherwise. We do have a lot on our collective plates, but I’ve been through too much to not have a relationship that’s really fulfilling to me. I’m not at a point of throwing in the towel over sex when there’s so much good between us, but I’m not sure how to address it without making things worse, him feeling pressure to perform, or him not realizing I do appreciate everything else he does. I know some of it is my own triggers and past, but really feeling wanted on a physical level is really important to me.