This is a tough one since she is your neighbor. Have you read up on any assertiveness techniques? There is one that I believe is called "fogging", and you come up with one standard response and use it every time, even if they keep pushing. Something like, "I need to be alone right now, I'm too tired for company." And repeat it every time she contacts you, until she just gets tired of hearing it and moves on. Since she is supposedly bipolar, maybe she is in a manic phase right now and her obsession with you will eventually subside. Good luck!

Thanks. This one doesn't take a hint.

I'm just not equipped to deal with her. I have anxiety issues. I've told her that. She doesn't care.

She's just going to drive me crazy forever :(

I'm going to take it one day at a time and keep saying "no". Ugh.

Ugh I just resent people like that. I think you just have to start literally saying no to her, on all accounts. I know it's hard, but you have to be firm, calm and direct with her. Don't make yourself available to her. Shut it down.

Women are often conditioned to think stating affirmatively what you want or don't want is not polite. You can politely say NO.

Yes, I know. I'm going to have to learn to be more assertive.

I'm sorry I gave her my phone number. She's really quite selfish, and likes to talk about her problems. Yup,, it's causing me resentment.

I don't mind being neighborly at all. We all need a good neighbor.
But this is ridiculous. She just invites herself into my life.

I'm actually starting to get the creep vibe.

I would get a creep vibe too. Start reigning things back in quick. Practice being assertive. It gets easier the more you do it.

Thanks. I'm going to have to. When I'm out in my yard and I see her walking towards the fence, I feel my anxiety shoot up from a 4 to a 10.

I got a guard dog and she actually started throwing milk bones and balls over the fence to befriend him. Lol.

Some people really can't take a hint.

I really like the "fogging" advice. I have never heard of that tactic, but I'm going to keep in mind should the need arise. "I'm busy, I don't have time for this now'". Don't even say "I'm sorry". Cuz you are not, you are too busy for her right now.

About the dog, whenever you see her put stuff in your yard, calmly put it back in her yard. Also call your dog off if he goes for the bones and toys. He will learn to leave that stuff alone until you can put in back in her yard. Can you tether the dog on a short lead so he doesn't have access to that part of the yard?

I’ve had a lot of experience with people with bipolar disorder, both close to me and not personally close to me. I advise not to tell her to *uck off. You don’t want to make an enemy IF you can help it. Also, there’s no reason to hurt someone unnecessarily (being bipolar is a very difficult life, and some folks who are dealing with bipolar really do need friends, and are sensitive despite their bravado.) Basically I’m saying you can stick to your personal values of being nice, AND can be comfortable in your own home, but to do so you are going to have to be very, very consistent in how you deal with your neighbor.

You MUST be assertive. Not aggressive, which is what it would be to tell her to *uck off. No, be assertive. If you are assertive and consistent and only deal with her when you are in the mood for some company or interaction, that will help. Be honest about what you need. If she comes to the door and you are really enjoying some TV show, or a chat on the phone with a friend, or you need to balance your checkbook, or take a nap, or … anything … just say so and stick to it.

Honesty has been important to the people I’ve known, who are bipolar. Oh, they may not always be honest with YOU! But they want a certain amount of honesty from others so they have a feel for you and so they don’t feel embarrassed or let down. If, for example, you don’t want to let someone in, but you do so anyway on a regular basis, and later they found out you don’t want them there, you will later hear ‘Why didn’t you just TELL me?!’

Assert your lifestyle and stick to it. If you are standing at the door and she wants to come in, be sensitive enough to know whether she really needs a shoulder, or whether she’s just being pushy, and then decide whether you want her company (or to go along with what she has in mind) or not, and act accordingly. Sometimes you may just want her to go away, so tell her what you’re doing and that you want to be alone. Other times, maybe a stroll down the street for a cup of coffee isn’t an awful thing, but you don’t want to sit and talk forever. You tell her ‘Sure, that would be nice, I only have 30 minutes, though’. And at 30 minutes you get up and walk away.

She will not always agree with you, or go away immediately, but you will feel so much more comfortable in your own home once you have established a pattern of being truly consistently honest with this woman.

By the way, it sounds like you’ve been very patient with her, lets give you a pat on the back, because you really are a nice person!

P.S.
It's better to deal with it before you blow. I have a coworker who is not bipolar, but who is annoying. At first I liked her and thought she'd be a great new friend, but she began to wear on me and I finally just blew up at her instead of telling her all along what I was okay with and what not, whenever something came up. If I had it to do over, every time I questioned her actions I would have asserted myself and called her on it.

I learned from that and became more assertive and now address the issues when they arise, and she stands still and listens, knowing I'm going to do this. I must say I'm more comfortable now because I feel free to be myself with her in the moment, rather than letting myself stew, and she's come to know me well enough to realize what things will be annoying to me, and she knows when she is going to have to answer to me if she makes a 'bad judgment call'.

Letting someone know the real you, the you that is not passive, can be the biggest step in getting your comfort level back.

That's one creepy neighbor, we can make movie out of this story, a thriller possibly,
jokes aside
tell her that you have anxiety issues and need space (a lot of space)

i guess she is the reason, the previous owner's sold the house.

Guess Jeana Rose is right

Honestly, I would tell her nothing about yourself. I think talking about any mental health or physical health issue, yours or hers with her will just make glom on to you more.

I don't believe in tip toing around people, regardless of their issues. Be firm, tell her to stop giving the dog treats, that you're training her and that doesn't help. I would say it in a tone that is not apologetic. She needs to get you're not messing around.

I don't believe you intend to be aggressive. I believe you were just saying what you feel like doing. If I acted on every feeling I had, I'd be behind bars.

I have really little patience for people like this.

OK, I have to correct myself, the technique I described is not "fogging", it is the "broken record technique". Fogging is also a technique, a good one also...I'll let you look it up if interested.

Thanks everyone, I'm going to use your suggestions.

I kind of resent it because really I mind my own business and after my nightmare of a divorce, I don't like confrontation. I'm not a mean person, but I don't like drama.

I resent it because I think these people pick up my energy , think I'm a pushover, and take advantage. And I'm sick of it.

She started sending me a text every morning that said "good morning beautiful". Wtf?

And she later wanted to know why I didn't tell her she was beautiful too.

Double wtf.

I was just wondering if I was crazy and just very unfriendly.

No what whe's doing is warped and effed up. I am really sorry you have to deal with that. I'd be so pissed off. Now you have walk around with your guard up. She's absolutely over the line. Do not feel bad for pushing back and if she gets upset, too bad. If she gets hostile where you feel threatened, contact the authorities. This situation sucks.

Yup. Sure does. Lol. Lucky me.

Thanks for the support. I really felt like I was going nuts. Like that movie ",the cable guy " with Jim Carrey. What a nightmare.