Dating "someone" who......

Yes, I would, and I have. But I would need to understand why things didn't work out, before getting too serious. For example, did things end because of cheating, drugs or abuse (by the person I am dating). It usually takes a long time, to get a know a person, why things ended (the truth), which is why it is wise to take your time, building a relationship.

I would and have. For me, it really depends on the person. I've dated some men who are divorced for a reason, and really have no business being in a relationship in general.. then there are some who really have been dealt a bad hand in general. Like I said, it just depends on the person.

for what it's worth, with my last/ current relation, I didn't not get a good idea what happened in his breakup, until about 6-9 months into our relationship. Before that, sure we talked a lot about it, but it wasn't until the time frame mentioned above, that the skeleton's/ baggage really came out. He'd only been married once (but was in a serious relationship before that, both time, he was cheated on). The guy I dated before, that, he'd been married twice. And again, I didn't learn about they whys, what happened, until many months later (6 months plus).

At my age, there are very few available that have not been married and divorced. As the board replies, in time a person finds out the hows and whys, and jmo, many a bad marriage has helped create very good partners, sometimes ones past can create a better future.

The pros: to me a person who has been married is showing that they have experienced a serious commitment and even thought the first marriage didn't work out, it didn't make them fearful to make that commitment again. ( and by all means, I am not saying that commitment without legal marriage is impossible or vice versa)
History of long term relationships, sharing a house, in general shows me that a person knows how to live in a family, which to me is important.

The cons : crazy ex spouses and child custody battles. Hate it, can't deal with it. I feel badly for the men who go through it but I ve seen it produce so many problems in relationships.
I'm sorry to say this, but in US men get screwed when it comes to custody battle issues and it affects everyone.

I have dated divorced people (Heck I am 48, at my age they are all divorced).
But none that were divorced more than once.
As someone else already said it depends on the circumstances involved and it can take a while to find out the truth because you will only be getting one side of the story.

If I met someone who had been married and divorce 5 times....I would really wonder about that...haha!

Oh and I agree with Aronia.......the whole ex wife or ex husband can be a real pain in the ass.

I prefer men that don't have kids but again at my age.....those odds are real slim.

Sure! Hopefully they don't want to head to the altar a third time.

Okay..but then again I've seen guys want to get married a third or second time! Its not uncommon..if you found someone who you just really click with them and you actually enjoy the same stuff wouldn't you consider marriage a third time?

I would however in my opinion there are 3 sides to every story his side, her side and the truth and one might not ever know the 3rd side but I base my relationship with anyone on how they treat me as well as others and I take it from there.

I figure I am pretty perceptive got some common sense and I trust my gut so I figure time will tell me all I need to know:)

Sure, partner is divorced once and he was in a live-in long term relationship. The divorce ended badly but the whole marriage was bad from the beginning. The live-in relationship ended mutually on good terms because her career took her to CA and his was in NC.

I would not get involved with a divorced guy who had small kids. I love kids, I have kids but my sons are 28 and 30 and I'm done raising kids. Partner has kids but they were teenagers when we met and are now adults.

No - I wouldn't.

The best predictor of future behaviour, is past behaviour - and two divorces is a deal breaker for me. The odds of number 3 working out are less than slim....odds for third marriage ending in divorce are over 75%. Why sign up for that.

It also suggests that the committment is taken pretty lightly. Don't like it? just get a divorce. Easy. That's not how I operate.

Also - all the baggage.....nope. Just nope.

I have been divorced twice. Frankly, it is embarrassing, but I have been upfront with the women I have met . I totally get how a man or a woman would not feel comfortable dating someone that has been divorced more then once. I try not to think this way but I even think/feel I am a two time loser. I realize I have made mistakes in both marriages that I need to look at and take responsibility for. I worry, have I really learned from my mistakes? Will I repeat the pattern of errors I have made in the past in a new realtionship? I certainly can see how the percentage of third marriages ending in divorce would be very high.

I'm of two minds on the subject.

1) failure rates for marriages, as of the statistics I was shown while going through co-parenting classes during my own (first) divorce were something like this: (I don't remember the exact numbers, but I believe these are close)

first marriage: 35%
second marriage: 65%
third marriage: 85%

It all averages out to that 50% failure rate we hear about. But with almost all statistics, there is always a complication. In this case it is that almost ALL of those 2nd and 3rd ones that failed, that marriage happened within two years after a divorce.

So, being on a 2nd or 3rd divorce might be a red flag, but not a show stopper... what would that make it an orange flag?

My other thought is that blindly applying rules to life, IMNSHO, rarely gives you the results you think it will, and every individual situation should be examined for what it is, intelligently and openly. I know of a very happy couple that were the 3rd marriage, and it happened within the 2 year window of failure... and it appears that they will always be together.