In theory, sure. But I tend to think you should believe someone when they tell you they just want to be friends. He may now just be more relaxed because he doesn't have to worry about the romantic component.

Take care of your heart in all this. I think it's dicey remaining friends with an ex, especially if you are still holding out hope that you'll end up back together. Things can get really confusing.

Do Not hold out hope for this man.

Get out there and date other men and hang out with other friends.

I know I shouldn't be holding onto hope for him. He's just gotten more sweet and we have more fun and ease of conversation since the breakup. Here's the kicker too is we are still sleeping together.

This happened to me once...I got dumped we took a break for a year and during that year we went a few months without seeing one another but eventually started sleeping together again and then got back together. I've heard of it happening. It's hard cuz I really felt it with him

"Has anyone had a guy (or girl) break up with them because of lost feelings and remained friends (or maybe not) and then the feelings came back and they ended up back together?

If feelings can go one way, they can certainly come back IMO"

"This happened to me once...I got dumped we took a break for a year and during that year we went a few months without seeing one another but eventually started sleeping together again and then got back together. I've heard of it happening. It's hard cuz I really felt it with him "

Your own personal experience gives you the answer. If the "he likes, he likes me not, oh goodie, he likes me again" thing was really feasible long term, you would still be with the first guy.

Fair enough, I was just asking for honest opinions, I guess I sure got what I was looking for

Very few men turn down sex. And in his mind, he thinks your agreement to continue to be friends means you are perfectly fine being buddies who fuck. Sorry for being that blunt but that's what this is.

Why would you continue to have sex with him if you're friends? I'm not talking about him having sex with you, but why YOU are letting that happen? This is why being friends with exes when you still have feelings for them rarely turns out well. He gets to have all of you with no commitment or hassle and you end up just holding out false hope.

Stop trying to read into everything he does. This has nothing to do with him. I would focus more on why you're still putting everything into this man who is not your boyfriend.

As painful as it is, walk away, with your dignity intact.

Yea, I ve done this before - " friendly" sex. It only works if you have no feelings for each other. If you love him and he knows it, he is using you and you are allowing it. It really isn't friendship.
Tell him you started dating and stop having sex with him. Hen you will see how much of a " friend" he is to you.

I 100% agree with rmb and I think Aronia has a great way to test that theory AND it puts you in control. I like it.

you just keep asking the same stuff over and over again - and get the same answers.......and they're the answers you already know anyway...

the longer you prolong this, the harder it will be - and you're only making it more difficult on yourself.

You need some work around self esteem and self worth - and I agree - stop the sex and see how long he hangs around.

If he wants to be friends and if you want to be friends .. Great!!.. I would absolutely stop having sex with him if your feelings go beyond friendship and you are hoping that he's going to come back to you as a boyfriend... Right now he has his cake and he's eating it to... I think what he's doing is really hurtful IF he knows that you care for him a lot more then a friend?
I think you're setting yourself up for a fall Shanb.... Big hug...xo

I'm not sure IF he knows how strong my feelings are. He's leaving on Friday to go to Arizona for a week, possibly a bit longer and during that time I'm really going to think and hopefully come to a decision about what I'm willing to put myself through. We had amazing sex on Friday and he said how happy he was that I was in his life and that he cared about me. He wanted me to tell him the same which I did genuinely. Then he said "tell me you love me as a friend" which seemed a bit weird to me. The connection we have is absolutely insane, I know he feels it because he said so. It's passionate, slow, sensual, lots of kissing. Anyways....
We hung out yesterday for like 10 hours and him and his best friend (who's my friend now too who I have been starting to hang out with outside of Josh) came furniture shopping with me. He was being a great friend, making sure I was happy with the couch I was going to buy. We ended up buying a couch and love seat under my information....me keeping the couch and Josh keeping the love seat. It was a better deal to get both and I ended up paying an extra $100 on the couch while he got the love seat for almost $500 less than regular price. He asked if I was sure it was ok to pay the extra....I said yes. He was so excited when we were sitting down and signing papers and paying. He's like "you think it's a good choice right? The love seat will look awesome and be good for when I eventually get my own place don't you think?" He rubbed my arm twice and said thank you. It felt the least I could do because I was proud of him for graduating and also he's built me 3 things and helped me a lot. He gave me a very big hug with feeling as we were leaving. In the car driving to our next destination he was still talking about the love seat and making sure I was happy with my couch purchase...he's like it's nice when we can work together as a team and it worked out so well and then he rubbed my leg. I had stopped to let a bus into my lane which he didn't notice and he said "you can go Hun" or something like that. I swear that's what I heard, him calling me Hun. It was likely a slip I felt he wanted to tell me something after in the grocery store. Or at least his demeanour changed a bit and stopped texting and staring at his phone so much and actually became attentive. We hung out at Jeremy's and I swear he kept looking at me differently and instead of him just being "how's it going over there hey?" He'd say "how's it going over there Shannon?"
Yes, I'm likely hoping and thinking it's something when it's not. Especially cuz he didn't say anything when I dropped him off or give me a hug goodbye which he always does. Maybe he was feeling something and wants to think before he acts or its all just nothing and I'm analyzing every little thing thinking it's good or bad.
I'm getting counselling....I'm going to work on my self worth. I do believe he will be my friend even if I stop the sex.

The fact that he called you by your name makes you think he feels more for you than friendship??? Come on.

He should pay you for that extra $100 that you had to spend on the couch. But outside of that, I would caution you to not do things for him that involve your finances.

How is making sure your ok with your own couch that you purchased being a good friend?? It's not like he bought it for you.

I initially thought he was just a clueless dope and not intending to use you but I do think he says nice and reassuring things to exploit your feelings for him, to take advantage of you.

I really hope some distance from him while he's away will help you snap out of this fantasy you have going. Hang out with some girlfriends, re evaluate your relationship with him and with yourself. And definitely get some help. I know you either can't see it or don't want to see it but none of this is healthy.

Love to meet this guy. I'd eat him alive.

I have to agree with RMB.
You are not seeing reality here.

You really need to move on from this guy.

I am so sorry.

I've been in that situation and got seriously heart broken
It won't work please get out of there and stop seeing him

This is a truly scary level of self delusion........

Ask yourself why you're so desperate to only see things this way? When its so obvious that your version of reality is distorted? what is so bad about reality, and letting this guy be who he is without this desperate and needy level of attachment....

Who would you be without this self destructive behaviour?

The Work - by Byron Katie - look into it. You need a lot of help.