Fibromyalgia Support Group
You're not alone in your pain. Fibromyalgia is a condition that can be difficult to diagnose and manage. If you're trying to cope with pain throughout your body, sleep problems, general fatigue, or other common fibromyalgia symptoms, you're in the right place. The community is here for you to talk about therapies and share your challenges.
Do you ever feel that the fibro fog affects your self esteem? I always felt like something was off. I never felt smart and I always measured myself up to my sisters. I didn't go to college right after high school because I felt dumb.
I still feel dumb. For instance, there is something going on with our van and we thought it had something to do with the axles. So we agreed it's best not to drive it until we got it looked at. Anyway, I was able to take it in and it turns out it's the tires. They are really bad. And we don't have the money to get new ones. But it didn't occur to me that I shouldn't drive it still. I haven't yet but I planned on it. Well, my husband I were talking about it this morning and he got upset with me because I had planned on driving it. He said we talked about me not driving it and he didn't know why I planned on it. We actually didn't talk about me not driving after realizing its the tires but I don't know why I thought it would be okay to drive it.
Another example is disciplining my daughter. She's 8 and the other day she was really rude to me but it didn't occur to me to punish her. I mean, I told her she was being rude but that's as far as it went. I'm frustrated because she needs consistency and I'm not that because I forget.
I have self esteem issues and a bazaar way of thinking and it's not fun. Anyone else go through this?
I still feel dumb. For instance, there is something going on with our van and we thought it had something to do with the axles. So we agreed it's best not to drive it until we got it looked at. Anyway, I was able to take it in and it turns out it's the tires. They are really bad. And we don't have the money to get new ones. But it didn't occur to me that I shouldn't drive it still. I haven't yet but I planned on it. Well, my husband I were talking about it this morning and he got upset with me because I had planned on driving it. He said we talked about me not driving it and he didn't know why I planned on it. We actually didn't talk about me not driving after realizing its the tires but I don't know why I thought it would be okay to drive it.
Another example is disciplining my daughter. She's 8 and the other day she was really rude to me but it didn't occur to me to punish her. I mean, I told her she was being rude but that's as far as it went. I'm frustrated because she needs consistency and I'm not that because I forget.
I have self esteem issues and a bazaar way of thinking and it's not fun. Anyone else go through this?
I think a lot of us have self-esteem issues from the cognitive difficulties and other things. I get very frustrated because there was a time when I called myself the "eight track mind" (you can tell how long ago THAT was) because I could keep so many mental balls in the air at the same time. Now I'm incapable of doing the simplest tasks some days, and I'm convinced I can't learn anything new.
I'm sorry you're dealing with this - maybe others will have some positive suggestions for you. My biggest issue is forgetting so I carry my iPhone like it's a part of my body and my whole life is in the calendar app.
Please do not beat yourself up. We have to talk nice to ourselves and accept that sometimes we are dingy. :D
I can't understand books I read, or how to spell things when I type, I have to read really slowly because I keep forgetting what line I was on.... I'm sure people who don't know me very well think I'm mentally retarded!
I find myself saying "I used to be smart, I swear!"
Is Brain Fog permanat? Do we know what causes it?
I think our brain signals are misfiring or bouncing around. which causes fibro fog and pain.
I have always had problems with names, but, since the fibro has become bad, I sometimes even mix up the name of family members.
I have always been able to do a lot of math in my head and easily read and comprehend math skills if I didn't already know them. Now I am luck to be able to add numbers in my head correctly.
And passwords...I have a horrific time remembering passwords online now. I would write them down, but I am afraid I would misplace them.
So, yes, I understand. Hang in there!
My favorite moment was when my daughter did something & I wanted to say 'Perfect!" but instead I said "Purple!" (I snickered just writing that)
Seriously - if I'm on the phone with someone I take notes. My husband thinks it's funny, but hey, I'm going to forget otherwise!
I also can't tolerate antidepressants - even beta blockers & Flexeril throw my system for a loop. The worst was in the beginning when I was on them & my Mother-in-law called to ask when my daughter's Birthday party was. I had COMPLETELY forgotten her birthday. I thank my MIL to this day for calling & asking.....
It bugs me when I can't remember words and make stupid mistakes. It would bug anyone. I have set routines about some tasks (like set up coffee pot at night cause in the morning I'm extra foggy.) I use a planner and to-do lists just to keep track of basic tasks.
Also I have set up a routine to help burn off the fog in the morning. It involves mostly a set of computer chores: checking email, checking DS, checking to see if I've had on-line sales in the night. Then I switch over to playing chess against my computer, usually in "training mode"- it really stretches me to try and analyze. I also meditate and drink coffee. After 2-3 hours I am feeling ready to take on the demands of the day.
In addition to creating methods to compensate, the other thing is to just not sweat it or be down on yourself about it, because fibro fog is not our fault. I don't fret about it any more.
As for whether it's permanent, for me it comes and goes- just like the fog by the ocean.
I have all the issues that everyone has listed. I never was real smart smart in school, put at least I had self-esteem and tried my best. Now, I'm scared to try anything new. What use to take me 20 min. now takes me an hour to do. Then I have to check it over and over to make sure its right. I have NO self-esteem anymore. It's a trouble feeling not being able to trust your own actions.
I'm still working full time, and I don't know how long I can keep up this pace. Have to write everything down, my spelling is real bad, and my memory is getting worse. It gets real stressful to keep up with my work. With the fibro fog and pain some days seems unbearable. Knowone understands more than everyone on this support group what we all deal with daily.
God Bless
This very week I wrote a journal .....it started off with If driftwood and chalk had a baby I would be the baby. I am so out of it at times.....sometimes I know I'm out of it and other times I got nuttin'. I try telling people that I may be looking at you with intelligent eyes, but the truth is most of the time I am one solid sheet of teflon windshield......nothing sticks, nothing stays round long......so even as I'm nodding and seemingly aware, I won't have a clue ten minutes later or the next day.......hard to call it via the memory of things at all. At other times I seem to do alright and then I go back down the slide .........I'm so grateful that I know the big stuff.....my name, my address, my kids names and phone numbers.......phone numbers are slippery little suckers.......sigh. be kind and respectful and tactful.........you are doing the best you can. your body is exhausted because it is in pain, it isn't getting a great quality of rest and you are doing way to much for a sick person............
it all adds up to just too much for a body.............use a notebook or sticky notes to help you remember things. whatever works best. a lot of times i am in a conversation, the fatigue hits hard and I am just not there.......I appear to still be there, but I am so GONE. People say things to me and I don't process it correctly .....it creates a lot of awkward moments.........sometimes an hour later I'll think I never said anything to that person OUT LOUD........words trapped in the head don't make for a very good communication.........i feel ya, hear ya and am sending hugs..........do your best, be nice to dear you and don't stress too much.........just try to find a method that aids you and do your best to let your family know as you can how you roll.......help them help you...............big big hugs.......we get it here, vent and work on things with us..........we want to help you find a way to better......we all need some better........xoxo
This is a daily problem for me. It doesn't just happen once in a while. It causes a lot of social anxiety.