Was it chemicals, was it a virus, are my pain receptor not working right. I have seen a change in the answers through the years. i try to guess when I got fibromyalgia. Since I can remember I ached. I never really said anything at eight because I thought every one did that. when I was ten I slipped a disc in my neck that wasn't found out until I went to the othedontist when I was 12 to see if I need braces. In fourth grade I started playing the flute. I practiced the normal amount of time and sometimes forgot to practice. In band my jaw would tighten so bad I would have to stop playing. I hate tmj at ten years old. My extra of my jaw was very strange. The ortho wanted do thousands of dollars of work. He said he had only seen my jaw in old people. My jaw bones were practically touching. My mom not having alot of money decided to get a second opinion with a chiropractor. Thus at twelve I started seeing my trusty chiro. He always made my jaw feel better when it slipped out and locked and was just messed up. Thus then I beleve my neck problems started. myfascial. neck and jaw pain. I was twelve and I ached. Had been doing that as I said for years. Hm. Obviously this injury has something to do with the severe pain and myofascial I have in my jaw and down my neck. I can even see it making my head hurt and going down in my shoulders and arms. But was it all from the injury. Why had I ached since childhood. I lived near enough to the Kodak plant in the seventies to be breathing its heavily polluted air. It also seems strange that my grandmother has reumotory arthritis and is my likely suffering from fibro too if she would go to a doctor. My mom may have had it for years but was only diagnosised in the last five or six years. She also had a mild case of polo as a child. Doctors say it could just be polo disorder. I sick a lot as kid. more than my brothers and sister. A lot infections from the start. I also think I never handled stress as well as everyone else and my body took alot of tension. I don't know. Today I am thirty eight was diagnosised in the early ninties and have been on almost every pain med and muscle relaxants known to man. With me I think the relaxant is more important to the pain med. Right now I question everything. I see others living there lived on supplements. I am not a stranger to pain. My tolerance is high but the only supplements I take is vitamin B and D and calciuam and magnesium. I have become tolerant to all meds they have given. Me. Some didn't work of course but the ones that did never lasted longer than a few months until I had to take higher dosage. Right now I decided in June to finally get out of a relationship I had for ll years. I thought my stress would diminish alot. it is hard though when you don't drive. Have no friends because you weren't given the chance during relationship. Controlling. Your family is not able to help you. Your sister lives in town she can't do anything cause her husband and she and daughter work and they only have one car. She also has two special needs children. She barely is getting three hours of rest now. It sad. I was getting transport to doctors visits with my insurance. Well my insurance was suppose to have changed counies two days ago. it didn't get done. I can't get to my doctor. He also needs to send another paper in that I have to make him fill out. I can't go there and give to him and it may not happen. He considers fibro a temporary things. I didn't get Liftline because his lack of medical info. I don't know how much longer I have to get him to expound on this in case the new program I am trying to get into will consider me unexceptable because of no way to get to the doctor and have an ignorant physcian. I can't take regular transportation which for me is the bus. I also have chronic fatigue, chincal depression , anxiety and painic disorder. other mental health issues and medical ones. I have disablity for my mental health isssues. Is there any reason I should try for fibro. It seems stupid because I can't get benefits twice but I can prove that it is a serious issue. I just pray I can get to the doctor on time to get to understand that I am just exsisting and tell him what my day is like. I think he may see the light but is there time to find a different physcian who take Medicad and Blue Choice option which is my HMO with Medicad who knows what he or she is doing. I have switched so many doctors in Rochester I don't think there any left who know enough about Fibro and take my insurance. I am down. Not only am I in pain I am still trying to figure out why I was given this. What truely is this and how can I make it better. when I moved I had a hot tub and it helped but then my landlady sold it because it didn't help her daughter who has fibro. I didn't have the money to buy it. I have to rely on my ex to take to the grocery store and that is hell. He doesn't know what a controlling annoying person he is and he makes me carry in my groceries. Really not helping. if I got this program. I would get transportation for what I needed. I have someone come in to help with meals and cleaning. I would be able to go out to social events and talk to other instead of being completely alone. I would have a worker to help me with any problems I had with my landlady etc. They would take over my section 8 so I wouldn't be discriminated against if I ever wanted to move. It is a new program from the federal government to keep people out of nursing homes. It is for NY state and you may qualify. if you have questions feel free to ask me. I wonder all the time just what started all this. I have read the literature but can't agree on one thing. I know I am tierd of all this. I know not always having a partner is the best. It can be worse but I couldn't stay with him anymore just cause I was dependent. My Mom did that with my dad. Please keep me in your prayers that things will work out. if you live in Rochester and know of a doctor who could help and takes Medicad and Blue choice option please tell me. if anyone lives near me or wants to just email me. I live off North Winton Rd in the city. It not a bad area at all. My street is mostly families.if I can help you with anything please email me. Just keep praying. I have also been trying to go to Bethel Church for more than a month if you go there maybe you could find someone who lives near me and tell them about me. I went there as a child had same pastor. I have called four times and I guess I will keep trying. Seems strange that no one is willing to pick me up. Keep me in your prayers I really need them. I am stranded. I will be going to actually family reuion this week. I haven't seen all my siblings in five years. I guess they can pick me up for this. I don't know how am suppose to have fun but oh well. Maybe I can get some groceries on the way home if my parents don't stick me on the bus. I need a new family that is reliable and near me. Maybe some day.

So I got these heat wraps at my drug store. I'm trying them out at work. Put it on my upper back and shoulders, says it's good for 8 hours. Doesn't take the pain away, but the heat feels good on my back. I guess it will help me to get through the day at work.